I've been a little freaked out to join this forum, despite its great reputation and my positive experiences with a number of kintsugijin on tumblr. I haven't joined a forum in years - in fact I've actively avoided building up social connections for quite some time. I kind of want to change that and it's pretty scary. So... I'm a tabletop gaming nerd, big on DIY OSR D&D when I'm not avoiding doing things that make me happy. I write some, I draw some, I studied religions in college and I have large opinions on certain things but I worry about steamrolling conversations. I have been dealing with depression for most of my life, and I mean I actively avoid the things I enjoy for years at a time because I resent my anhedonic inability to enjoy them. I have been trying to push myself to get treatment but man am I stubborn sometimes! Also presently dealing with some identify questions. It took me years to accept my bisexuality and I'm almost done doubting it - getting romantically involved with a NB partner is pretty convincing ^_^ But I'm kind of up in the air about gender. Seebs has been instrumental in showing me that ambiguous gender identity can be okay, I'd just really like to know myself better than I do. For now I'm still using he/him pronouns but I'm comfortable with they/them and I won't object to she/her either. Idunno, I guess that's all I've got to say for now. I'm not really sure where to start here. I've browsed the various forums and I'm just a little overwhelmed.
Hi there! ^^_ ^^ *waves* welcome aboard ::D if you're into tabletop, i know we've got general discussion threads about those, either in fan town or in galley's turn, probably the latter, although there you also have the threads for the currently running rps, tabletop or otherwise. *offers a genderfuck high-five* you're not alone regarding the "wtf gender is even" thing, we've got a whole subforum for that, gender wtf of the day thread included. apart from that, just plop yourself down in a discussion if it's interesting and you've got stuff to say about it! or just lurk for a while. any other fandoms, besides tabletop? what's your fave d&d edition?
Fav D&D is weirdly the Whitebox/pre-installed edition. I like the simplicity of the rules so I can mutate it to my taste without throwing other things off. I season my campaign with stuff from the B/X and BECMI versions of the basic/classic game as well as tidbits from retro-clones like Labyrinth Lord and LotFP. (I can write at great and terrible length about d&d and the various editions and playstyles if you enjoy Way Too Much Detail or Very Large Opinions). I also really like fifth edition, but I haven't gotten to play very much yet. Roomies are starting a new campaign in the next few weeks, so I'll get some more of that. As for other fandoms, I'm kind of averse to joining communities (coming here is an experiment in improving my well-being), so I don't much participate in fandoms. But some of the things I really love include Twin Peaks, the Black Jewels, most of Neil Gaiman's work (but not American Gods for some reason), Blue Monday, and the Goon. I faithfully read Dumbing of Age and Questionable Content. My favorite superhero is Renee Montoya as the Question. I also consider myself filthy homestuck trash, although I'm pretty low end compared to some of the folks here, from what I've seen. I haven't even finished, due to ongoing technical issues -_- Uh, I have heard it said that there are people who love one particular thing in great depth and people who love a great number of things but somewhat less deeply. I'm more the latter category for sure.
I have both played and DM'ed 4th ed, and have to say I like 3.5 a lot more. And I won't touch 5th with a 10 ft. pole, same with DSA 5. My system of choice is WH40k Dark Heresy, even though I kind of dislike the setting, but that's what cribbing the system and applying a different setting to it is for. Next favourite is Private Eye, which is also a d100 based system. Wolsung is also funny, although I'm not that much of a pulp fan. I think my problem with D&D, Midgard, DSA, etc. is that it looks too much like generic fantasy to me to care. I'm still a fantasy fan, but... it needs to be really, really good of a setting and DM for me to care any more. Speaking of good DM's, one of my earliest games was 7th Sea, and I'd play about any setting with this DM, he's just that good. Shame we live 5 hours from each other now that I've moved away. Regarding communities, this one is about as chill as it gets (... there have been clashes, but only rarely, and we've got a place to discuss those away from the fandom threads so those don't get clogged with the drama), and it's mostly excited yelling about stuff ::D
There are things I really love in those editions (mathematical elegance, cinematic action-packed combat) but overall I find they don't fit my needs as well as I'd like. One of the things I like about whitebox is that it is more of a game about exploration, and combat is deadly and dangerous and unpredictably swings, so it suits a tone that is a little more gritty and pulpy than high fantasy. It also populates encounters according to the verisimilitude of the game-world rather than based on challenging the party, so it's easy to be flexible with my players. They can come and go from week to week, and whoever is around can mount the next expedition into the ruins or wilderness, in search of fortune or plot. My campaign is set in a distant colony of a collapsing empire (analogous to Roman-occupied Britain during the late classical/early dark age) and the aesthetic is very Howard & Wagner, with an overall theme of scoundrels carving out their own destiny in a hostile universe. But I'd like to start a new campaign focused on marginalized characters creating a sense of belonging in a knightly order of their own, striving to protect the realm and make the world more just. Sort of an arthurian romantic fantasy, with a gothic aesthetic and lowkey vampirism. That's been a dream project for a little over ten years, and I've been developing my own system to run it. Other games: I love Fudge, I'm lukewarm on Fate but I like some of its offspring like Icons. Big fan of Savage Worlds, used to be quite active in their forums. I'm impressed with a WIP called Magical Burst and hope to see its development continue (a magical girl game inspired by darker-toned shows like Madoka). I cut my teeth on the d6-based Star Wars published by West End in the 80s. I actually could go on all day, I collect way more games than I can play bc I love to see what designers are up to and how I can mutate or learn from their work.
Say, can anybody tell me the difference between Brainbent and Braaaaiiiinnnns? I can't put my finger on it, both look like brainweird to me
Tell me about your favorite Black Jewels characters. :D I think you are probably one of the few people I've met who's read Anne Bishop's stuff. Have you taken a gander at any of her other series? I'm actually a pretty big fan of the worldbuilding on Ephemera too. Braaiiinss seems to be (from my outside experience) more about asking for advice, information, and anecdata on certain types of brainweird. Brainbent in its current iteration is more of a vent thread/hugbox area, where advice might be wanted but isn't always.
:D I think I've only ever met one other person who knew Anne Bishop's work, not counting the people whose brains I have colonized myself! Oh gods I love them all! The characters are what I love most about the books, like every set of characters has an interesting dynamic and each individual is engaging. Even the villains are a pleasure to loathe. But Papa Saetan and Karla probably stand out as my special favs. Saetan as the reluctant badass, the adopted patriarch, the honorable to the end, the celebrant of darkness and life - he embodies a lot of my favorite character tropes and a lot of what I want to see in masculinity. Karla is so brazen and bold and I always love tomboy characters and androgynous characters and at the same time she fully embraces her femininity, she just defines it as part of who she is rather than something that defines her. Or that's how I read her anyway. So yeah, she also pushes a bunch of my buttons. I have mixed feelings about her being confirmed as a lesbian in Dreams Made Flesh, bc on the one hand I was glad to finally see some lgbt representation and I'm interested in how that changes the dynamics of Protocol but otoh I'm kind of annoyed that the most stereotypically "butch" woman was the first token. I dislike when that happens in fiction partly because it perpetuates the idea that if lesbian then this, and partly for the opposite reason, if this then GAAAAY. That just rubs me the wrong way. While I'm ranting I'm gonna say that I want to see more bi/pan characters everywhere (Willow fell in love with a girl after breaking up with a boy, she's gay forever now = disgruntled Xi) and more platonic love between genders. (Daemon and Surreal are great until they're not, Lucivar and Jaenelle are endlessly fantastic.) I'd also like to see how trans, nb, and genderweird characters fit into the Blood but I'm wary. /rant Also very fond of Cassidy, I can't articulate what grabs me about her but she's just so full of feels! I started the Tir Alainn books but they didn't grab me the same way and at the time I was kind of sick of seeing not-even-thinly-veiled witch-hunts in fantasy novels, but I might try them again. Haven't tried the Ephemera books and can't glean enough from promotional material to whet my interest, but maybe you can tell me what awesome? But I did read the first book of the Others and I love it terribly. It's an intriguing approach to urban fantasy, creating a modern setting in a fantasy realm, but it has some if her least polished writing (an antagonist motivated by the hope of leveraging her larceny into a television career, a city called Sparkletown, some places that are barely-renamed earthly places, others that are straight-up fantasy places) but again I love the characters. I'm here for them and their interconnections and the plot is just an excuse to keep pushing them around. But man, it could have really used a firmer editorial hand. (tl;dr: Written in Red is embarrassing garbage and I love it to pieces) ^_^
(I'll admit, I was always a bit bitter/sad that Surreal ended up with Daemon in the end and not Karla. I loved that ship with such a huge passion, and while confirmed gay Karla was nice, I would have liked to have a bi Surreal too) Saetan as the embodiment of masculinity while being acknowledged to be soft spoken and genteel and a little effeminate in the face was... nice? Like, there were places where he was shown to be a bit stodgy and set in his ways, and he occasionally had Opinions about gender (which were always rebuffed bc the Coven wasn't about to let him get away with it :P) but he genuinely cared, and that caring was so integral to his character and his masculinity and I just. I have so many emotions about how the men in BJT were shown to grow as people through caring, and how caring was so important to so many characters. edit: I am deeply attached to Rainier and Surreal. Every scene with them is like Christmas for me. Lucivar and Marian are close seconds though, with The Prince of Ebon Rih just barely missing Tangled Webs for my #1 spot. Tir Alainn has a rough start on book one, but books 2+3 end up being more about political wrangling and culture clash (and eventually war). Also you meet Askh, who is the best character, and ends up borderline QPs with Morag. I feel you on the witch-hunts-as-plots aspect of fantasy though-- I've got a few series where that's a major plot aspect, and even with them being my favorites it gets boring after a bit. Ephemera is like... the books are less connected, for sure. They end up following a specific character for each one, I think it goes Sebastion>Gloriana>Lee. Which fits, because the world is broken into shattered dreamscapes where the feelings and dreams of the people living there can shape them (for better or worse.) There's a loose thread where the Big Bad is an embodiment of evil, but a lot of the plot is contingent less of fighting it and more on teaching people to be kind/reinforcing that kindness affects the world around them. Which doesn't make the Big Bad any less horrifying, but. They're all basically one-to-one romances, which is par for the course, but I do like how they ran with it (and the third book has a species of people that are three souls inhabiting one body and they swap faces and it is sick as hell.) Same. Like, it is falling apart at the seams with the worldbuilding and yet... and yet. I'm caught up through Marked in Flesh so I won't spoil anything but there's definitely some tighter wrap up later on. Still feels a lot like loose worldbuilding to push the babies around but I can't say that I don't enjoy it.
I totally love how the characters in Black Jewels are building a family of their choosing, how the blood ties between them are really secondary to their choice to love and trust each other. I even like how this is driven home by the fact that as much as Daemon likes Lucivar and Saetan, his loyalty is always to Jaenelle full stop. Even though he's the most like his father out of all the family, that fact has no real power over him; he chooses to bond with his father and he is fully capable of walking away from that if he needs to. I feel that's a very powerful message, and I would recommend these books to any abuse survivors with the important caveat that the depictions of abuse and cruelty can be a little unflinching at times, particularly in the first book. (I almost feel like we should start an Anne Bishop thread in fan town, but I kinda think most of what I'd want to say I've already said here!)
We could still make it anyways? I am Crossover Trash and I'll admit to occasionally doing things like trying to figure out classpects to the BJT characters (or, since I read this series first, I always try to figure out the rank and jewel character of canons :'D) and hey, it might pick up some traction? (I also love that the entire thing with Kartane is that being an abuse victim doesn't mean that your actions aren't abusive. I'm so glad that she wrote that he never deserved what happened to him, but none of his victims deserved it either.)
That is also a great point! And Kartane's doom was a direct result of his hurting other people. If he had asked for help earlier, he could have been saved, but continuing the path of abusing those weaker than himself just made him another villain in the end.
Oh hey, DIY D&D/OSR high-five! I'm currently running an editionless/kitbashed homestuck D&D game for some people on here, and slowly plinking together a time-traveling pirates open tabletop game with @Aviari. //drags you over to the D&D thread
I love the Black Jewels books to the point where my copies are falling apart at the seams. I kind of headcannoned that Saetan and Daemon both being natural Black Widows meant that they are a bit genderweird themselves, and said genderweird is maybe part of what makes them so powerful. As for her other stuff, I did like the Tir Alainn books when I read them, but I don't have as much attachment to them as the Black Jewels books. I liked Written In Red, but a couple scenes seemed to keep repeating over and over in slightly different forms over the next few books, so I haven't bothered picking up Marked in Flesh. Have you read anything by Jacqueline Carey? I got into her around the same time as I was reading the Black Jewels books, so if you haven't, you might want to check her out.
I have started buying the newer editions of the original trilogy, partly so the whole set will have visual consistency, partly so I have copies that can survive being loaned out. Headcanon accepted I tried the first Kushiel book but I didn't get far. I might have just been really unfocused at the time, so I might give it another try in the future. Or maybe a different series would be worth looking at even if Kushiel didn't work for me?
Hello! I don't have much to say beyond now I have some more books that I want to read! I hope you're feeling a little less overwhelmed, and enjoy your time here!
I liked Santa Olivia, which works well as a standalone, and is a completely different style than the Kushiel books. I enjoy that about Carey; she's got a couple different worlds, and her style (in the three that I've read) is different in each. I have a ridiculous amount of love for the original Kushiel trilogy and how a large part of how it plays out is because of Phedre's bond with her childhood bff, but I picked up and put down the first book a few times before I actually got into it.
