Reporting the mods

no no, a spockette is like a baby!spock. the immature form, before puppation.

 

Before spuppation (spockpuppet pupation)

 

Hey, this is getting a bit close to making fun of someone for having communication difficulties, which has potential for some serious splash danage on this forum.

Nor do I think Athol deserves to be made fun of, even if she is an asshole.

 

Aww, I was hoping the Spockettes could be a mildly embarrassing but well intentioned cheer squad that shows up when she’s about halfway to done, with some enthusiastic but painful motivational rhymes about moderation.

Seriously, though, the way you address someone (names, pronouns, and such) should get more and more scrupulously correct the less you like them. That might come across as frosty, but maybe that’s what you want. Using incorrect forms of address will sound like you’re trying to bully them.

 

Yeah, err on the side of over politeness. If you want to make it clear you dislike someone, frosty works just fine without being cruel.

 

ok, leaving stuff as a puzzle is the opposite of communicating clearly

beyond that, the aside about aids had nothing to do with anything I've said to you, and if it's in the wiggler then I haven't seen it

so, I'm reading this as "I'm only mean when people provoke me, and once I'm mad everyone else has to be extra nice to me or else I'll start yelling at everyone"

is that accurate?

Spock has actually been very patient with you, esp considering how you consistently refuse to treat her with any amount of basic human respect

 

Maybe clearer repeat statement: altering someones name is generally only a good idea if you are on good terms with them, otherwise it comes across as mocking them.

 

I think they were the one who got extra pissy about it. So yeah, I gave Spock an effeminate knickname, and it looks like the pronoun preference disappeared from their signature.

I explained my problem with pronouns, but I guess people just dismissed that in favor of believing that I'm trying to be deliberately disrespectful.

Yeah, I'm getting a bit annoyed at the amount of teasing that went on while I was getting groceries. More because I was making an effort and people seem to have taken it the wrong way.

That works as a good explanation, and this is a video that makes it really obvious.

https://kintsugi.seebs.net/goto/post?id=844069#post-844069 The tone I was trying for was a little in the "why do I have to repeat myself" range, but also relief. All I can figure out is that it wasn't as snarky as it should have been.

I would say emoticons might help, but that would require a guide on what emoticons mean what thing. (OMG, I was looking for examples, and never realized that there was a technology problem. I thought there was just people who thought poop meant chocolate.)

 

Uhhhh, Spock never got "pissy" (that's a bad word choice btw, it's incredibly invalidating) about her pronouns. She politely corrected you several times. If you wanna get mad at someone, I'm the person who specifically told you to shape up wrt pronouns. What did I do that made me deserve an apology where Spock didn't?

 

It was crossed out, and might have been a hint where I was coming from.

Yeah, the AIDS thing is in the wiggler... Fucking asshole mods using their moon-logic as an excuse to destroy any evidence that I'm open to recanting so that people can call me unrepentant. (Really, we're not on the same page about dogwhistles. The only way for me to get to their page is to let them gaslight me about what my intentions were.)

Yeah, I am only mean when people provoke me. However, the rest of it is that after a bunch of provoking, it gets really hard to read nice statements unless they're obvious. An easier thing to do might be to be super-obvious like stating "I'm here to help" or something. It's like people reading everything I say as bad just because I let some bullies push me over the line.

I've treated Spock with more respect than I've gotten here. I explained why it's hard to remember her pronouns, I tried to do something reasonable about it. I get called demanding for wanting people to actually listen to me.

 

Oh stop talking to me until you're ready to listen instead of going off the deep end. I've had my fill of crazy from the last one. If I had learned my lesson I wouldn't even give an opening in hopes of reconciling.

 

It's not moon logic and you're being incredibly demeaning. Even on posts that *don't* get wiggled you tend to manipulate the order of events and presentation of peoples words, including your own, differently. Like calling Spock pissy.

We had the pronoun conversation. You still need to apologize to her.

 

At this point, I'm going to get yelled at for apologizing wrong.

 

Also, you're sounding more and more like a narcissist whose façade is slipping. Maybe it's fleas from someone else, but we are not a bottomless well of emotional labour to be exploited whenever you have a curiosity about an incredibly tense topic.
For anyone to keep engaging there needs to be appreciation and acknowledgement of time and effort spent. Saying that you appreciate a well thought out response, acknowledging you read some of the sources.
We deserve thanks for the intense effort of trying to help you, even when you don't necessarily agree with conclusions drawn. Not just when your emotional requirements are met.
You can get better, you can *do* better, but you have to meet us half way.

 

If you got negative feedback on apologies it would be the same as last time since your apologies often put the burden of hurt on the person who felt it.
I'm not yelling at you. I have never been yelling at you. I've never been more than slightly frustrated in my communication with you.

 

Wow. This is fucked up. Spock isn't crazy?? Don't say that???
She's been trying to help you! And you don't get to say horrible things about her
Jesus fuck, *now* I'm yelling. That behaviour is reprehensible and I am not talking to you anymore until you apologize.

 

The opening was if you just calm down and say you're willing to listen. People told me to not go forward and catastrophize things before understanding them, now I'm asking you to do the same.

 

Oh my god *apologize* she has listened to you every step of the way and doesn't need to "calm down" when you've been insulting and demeaning her nonstop and that's just what we can see in public