blog to keep track of the night time adventures i go on when i cant sleep, and other things also [Edit: to say that interacting w me here is great and encouraged, if anyone feels inclined] last night though! started getting the spooked out chest flutters around 8pm (naps are evil traps filled with anxiety) so i went out. thought i might wander north toward the abandoned train bits, but went south toward the lake instead, because i wanted to see the water and it was less work to get there. ended up walking around the small enclosed part, 3~ miles. discovered that i can use the train tracks spit (land bridge?) to cut across the lake (it might be frozen enough i can just skitter across in a month or so. when i see the ice fishers camping out there, that means its safe, right?) which was very fun! discovered a cute little coffee shop across the lake that opens at 7am for early morning insomnia adventures in the future. ended up coming home at 10 or so, and watching parasite(2019). slept hard, was actually tired, but woke up with stiff legs. i wasnt sure the walking would help but it did, so, shows you past!spike
no outside adventures tonight, as roommate started having a real shit ptsd episode about when i got off work, so the night was instead ice cream and smoking on the porch and keeping an eye on things. i started making bone broth too, and texted some pals, and started picking through some old writing projects (and started posting on this forum again). it is wild to me how like, even the awful hard stuff is, in some ways, easier to handle than it was for us even a year ago. growth? trust issues say omen, but i wouldnt know what to do if i wasnt constantly waiting for the other shoe to drop, so.
this is unrelated to anything in this thread BUT since you asked on your profile: idk how many teeth exactly i have off the top of my head but i’ve always had fewer than normal too? (edit: counted and unless i fucked that up i have 28?) also they’re weird fucking teeth generally. TEETH BUDDIES.
it is Always the time and place for teeth dicussions!! 28 is a good number; i've literally only once met someone who had the ""correct"" number of teeth. did you just never get wisdoms/12-16 yr molars or? tell me about weird teeth, one of adult canines grew in backwards and ive never gotten any removed, 25 is just the natural number my mouth settled on TEETH BUDDIES!!
i got wisdom teeth and had ‘em yanked, but i had fewer baby teeth than average too soooo shrug emoji basically. it was prolly a similar situation to yours where my mouth just said “fuck it, 28’s good!” the weird things with my teeth are that they’re a bit short with a bunch of gaps—my two front teeth especially are very widely spaced (i can stick my tongue sideways through the gap)—and one of my canines is unusually pointy. i’ve got a fang. >:D
it has been raining literally all the past two days, but we briefly left town for a couple hours on friday and i got to explore a little path. encountered three Youths not more than 12 or so who came down the train tracks like an episode of stranger things, their leader with a skateboard in one hand and a mystery novel in the other. they asked me if id seen their stolen shopping cart.
i think i said something like "no, i came up the other way" and the two not holding things wandered off, but the leader took a couple moments to give me. his version of context? apparently theyd discovered the cart earlier and had hidden "treasures" in it, among other adventures, and i genuinely think i got caught in some sort of stephen king novel for a couple minutes there
yall ever look back like god damn that was the hypomania when i made all those plans and started actually living my life and now i struggle to get out of bed and havent done my laundry in two weeks? anyway, mad that lighthouse keepers arent strictly speaking a Thing anymore. i would like to bring that profession back
i have not done Much skulking during the nighttime but i did go to chicago with a friend and we roamed all over the city. im so good at riding the subway. it is freezing in the north and my horrible swamp body is trying to remember how to cope
unwilling to brave the outdoors, and also because it is easy and soothing, have been rewatching a lot of black sails and it is so incredibly fun to watch silver accidentally catch feelings. character pretends to befriend other character for Survival and accidentally ends up genuinely bonding is my jam, as is watching his motivations shift as soon as he does catch feelings. he's selfish and wants to live and wants his people to live and will do whatever he must to accomplish that goal and that.... appeals greatly. also, flint is pretty.
re:black sails: late season two/early season three is the best because for a hot minute silver genuinely suspects that flint is a sea god with control over the weather
classes are Fine(tm) so far. im still working through the boiling with rage part of interacting with rich college kids (and unfortunately anyone with enough income/support to live comfortably is Rich in my eyes) and also that literature class moves so very slowly (for me) but they seem good so far. i have the same ta for rocks class that i had last rocks class, which is comforting. i am... the only humanities major in the entire lab group, but i Will use this as a reason to ask a bunch of dumb questions. like what words are we supposed to use to describe the luster of rocks,
all rocks professors are very earnest and kind nerdy professors and i love. all the ones i have met so far. lecturing prof today was an older kentucky man who just seemed very chill and was not at all confused or repulsed by my everything, which is the quickest way to my heart,
school has begun!!! i do things from like 11am-9pm and then i come home and do more things like look at graduate programs and other homeworks!!! somehow this actually makes me pretty happy!!!! things sucked a bit today but i finally seem to have Made Friends with my coworkers enough for them to show me the secret place where the books the library doesnt keep are thrown away, and i got two neat little art books and a collection of Swamp Pictures and some color pages ripped out of an old guide to the Galapagos Islands. Many friendly iguanas to put up around my room. im working on making them crowns. if anyone ever wants to share reptile stories, please do
had a conversation about maybe doing brain meds w college psych. i have till the weekend to decide and i. Dont Want To. but i think i should try, just to see. and if it sucks i can stop taking them and then ill know thats not an option for me. meanwhile i love the goldfinch, book and movie. vicariously living catharsis through fucked up sad fifteen year old theo and boris in the desert