Adulting is Hard etc

Discussion in 'Brainbent' started by Enzel, Jan 14, 2016.

  1. Emma

    Emma Your resident resident

    Congratulations on your new job!
     
    • Like x 1
  2. Enzel

    Enzel androgynous jrpg protag

    Putting this here bc i still need a better way to keep track of things (i got a notepad app but its super unintuitive bleh) (maybe there are journaling apps instead??)

    -Get milk tomorrow
    -finish pillowcase
    -rent/budget math for this mo.
    -cap tomes in FFXIV
    -scan stuff

    -post writing on tumblr??
     
  3. Enzel

    Enzel androgynous jrpg protag

    *screeches at doctors for giving my partner the runaround*

    *wishes i could actually screech at doctors irl and that would get their pain taken seriously*
     
  4. Enzel

    Enzel androgynous jrpg protag

    (To the tune of "Agony" from Into the Woods) IiiiiiiinnnSOMNIAAAAA


    Anyway its amazing that ive been doing 5 7 hr shifts a week and i dont feel dead inside

    Physically still kinda shitty but i think 70% of it is my period so

    But not being emotionally drained by work is a fucking miracle

    1 week until paycheck!!! Then its...budget math time...(i have to work out a schedule to pay back partner & my parents)
     
    • Winner x 1
  5. Enzel

    Enzel androgynous jrpg protag

    Why is sleep difficult

    By which i mean my sleep schedule could be more regular but i went to sleep at 1-1:30 am and struggled to get out of bed until 10. 10 is when im supposed to *leave* for work

    I was hoping that earlier work schedule meant id adjust bc i was going to bed earlier but...urgh

    The meds adjustment helps during the day but it doesnt help w the morning lethargy and i have to get *out* of bed to take my meds to begin with

    Doesn't help that its so freaking cold in the mornings

    I dont rly know what to do other than wait and see bc again...period...but in the meantime i really dont like being late to work

    Technically its not a huge deal bc i just need to get my work done for the day so if im in 10 min late i can stay ten mins later to make up for it...im just...tired is overused but its true. Its embarrassing. Im nearly 30 and i still cant get to work on time.
     
  6. Enzel

    Enzel androgynous jrpg protag

    I accidentally confirmed w my manager that its fine if i don't come in at the exact time im scheduled and that makes me feel...a little better...but i still wish i could figure out how to manage time better

    Me trying to sign up for company health insurance: "thats how much i have to pay per month?? There's no way I'll be able to afford tha--" (remembers I'll literally be making over twice what i used to per month) "....ok that's not so bad."

    There wasn't much info about anything except the monthly fee (like what copays will be etc) but i asked a coworker & she got me the number for HR so they should be able to tell me...

    Did confirm that my current doctor takes this insurance so that will be ok. Also i will be able to get dental/vision which is. Really great honestly.

    Ear hurts a lot today. Its probably the TMJ. Was so stressed for so long that i never got it together to schedule an appt about it. Will try to do that Friday when i go in for therapy bc somehow its easier for me to talk to a receptionist in person than call on the phone...need a flu shot for this season too i think. (I can never remember if/when i got them)

    1st paycheck...tomorrow...(well i cant deposit it until Friday but i will be able to hold it in my hands.....) have a list of things to budget towards. Need a good pair of winter boots, luckily work gives me a discount. Need a fire resistant safe for important papers. Can start a 401k again. (Maybe in a few months)

    Definitely emotionally just...way better...had my first difficult customer but since i dont handle the sales end i don't need to deal w her. Wanted the sleeves shortened on a winter jacket, was a pain in the ass (i had to turn a 1 pc sleeve into cuffs to avoid putting in entirely new snaps which would be even more of a pain) but i agreed to do it anyway. She showed me how long she wanted them & after i did it took the coat home w.o trying it on, then called the store demanding a discount because they were ~still too long~ but it was too much trouble for her to come in and get remeasured i guess

    Feel a little bad for the manager/supervisor who have to wrangle her but man it is great that its NOT MY PROBLEMMMM. I just do the work people give me.
     
    • Like x 1
  7. Enzel

    Enzel androgynous jrpg protag

    If my rent check bounced because my landlord decided to deposit it in the exact 8 hours i dropped below the check amount before getting my new paycheck I'm going to scream

    I got a text from my bank on friday that said something like "you dont have enough in your account to cover a check, please make a deposit by next business day" and i deposited paycheck the same day like 4 hrs later. It's Monday and paycheck processed on Sat but nothing else has gone thru...not even a pending notification...can't find any info :/ haven't gotten any texts from landlord either so...idk???

    Did budget math and i should be ok this month but i have to be...cateful abt what i spend....might try to open commissions to pad it a bit. Id be fine if not for making payments toward the stupid deposit. Still owe abt $1100 once this rent check goes thru. Been paying in $300 bits but its still...oof.

    Id love to have savings again...soon...work has been weirdly slow, i shouldnt complain but there hasnt been any alterations to do for days so i end up helping coworkers out around the store, which is fine. But once there's nothing else to do i just sorta...sit there...and ppl are like " oh you can go home if you want" and im like " wwwwwell i gotta hit 30 hrs a week so i can pay all my bills ._. "

    SO BORING

    I organized all my sewing supplies and then the entire stockroom out of sheer boredom lmfao. I expect it'll pick up closer to xmas tho
     
  8. Enzel

    Enzel androgynous jrpg protag

    Successfully obtained doc appointment but it turns out that 1. My new insurance doesnt start until January and 2. TMJ mouthguards count as a dental thing so it needs to be covered by dental insurance, which i won't have until January 1st 3. The alternative is like $400 out of pocket so i guess im waiting 6 more weeks...its only been a year since i first went to urgent care for this...sigh

    So gotta call and move the appointment date and also...call my regular dentist bc i have a cleaning in december and see if i can get that moved too

    A little apprehensive since my boss texted me and was like "if theres no alterations for you to do you should just take the day off today" and im like...money...

    She said this happened at other stores where the work came suddenly piling in 6 weeks bf xmas after practically nothing so here's hoping. I budgeted based on doing 30hrs/week tho so...*distressed noises*

    Guess im going to do some creative stuff today then, a co worker from previous job owns this little shop with kids clothes and gifts and stuff and said she could sell my handmade bags for me. I have a few made and material cut for a bunch more and enough zippers for like 14 so that should be good until i can afford more zippers...

    Why is it so cold

    Why is it so damn hard to get laundry quarters these days
     
  9. Enzel

    Enzel androgynous jrpg protag

    Rent check went thru finally. One anxiety down.
     
  10. Enzel

    Enzel androgynous jrpg protag

    I've never been so happy to be told i have work to do lol

    Made progress on bags, got all the fabric cut out for like. A lot. I think like 35 of em. Need to make a pattern for paintbrush wraps too. And i guess a pricing chart. & try out new assembly method. (Old one involved a lot of hand sewing but i think i have an idea how to get more of it done on the machine to make things go faster)

    Aki getting me a rotary cutter for xmas *_____*

    Weirdly having sewing as my job made me more likely to do work on my own stuff, i guess because im in that mode more often?? Idk.
     
  11. Enzel

    Enzel androgynous jrpg protag

    Want to sleep

    Feet are cold

    Thats basically the biggest problem in my life at this moment, personally so i guess thats pretty ok

    Well, i forgot to pick up aki's pain meds & pharmacy is closed until monday so i feel pretty damn shitty about that, going to see if i can get it transferred to a CVS if possible but dunno if it is because the doc office is also closed

    Paycheck friday

    Dunno what it will be bc i didn't get all my hours these past two weeks for various reasons (boss told me to stay home one day bc there was no work to do..late because of train system maintenance...etc) need to find out if thursday is actually a paid holiday. I get to collect actual paid time off too like wtf. Anyway once i deposit it gotta do budget math again. I think i will be ok??? But not sure.
     
  12. Enzel

    Enzel androgynous jrpg protag

    Turns out i get PTO for holidays which is. Pretty cool but im like. Hmmmm can i spend it.....now..........

    I have...a dilemma...

    I had a teeth cleaning in Dec. but was going to call and reschedule for Jan bc that's when my new dental insurance kicks in. Ofc...what happens but i wake up 2 days ago with a toothache.

    It hurts but not...unbearably, like i could feasibly stick it out for a month, but...idk how much worse it would get in that time and how long it would take to get me scheduled for a filling if it *is* a cavity, so i would rather not leave it

    (Idk what else it could be but...)

    So wondering if i should keep the cleaning as is so they can take a look at it and schedule me something in jan if its bad...and just pay the out of pocket cost for that appointment (like $130 i think)

    I can't afford it now but they take like a month to bill so theoretically i would have the money then

    I could ask my parents to cover it but im an idiot and went and told them excitedly that i have dental insurance and they wont need to pay for cleanings anymore -_-

    I guess i will call dentist and ask for advice...worst case they won't have any and i just need to decide on my own
     
  13. Enzel

    Enzel androgynous jrpg protag

    I was fussing over the hurty tooth bc i don't want it to get worse and while flossing poked the gum between it and the tooth next to it and it kinda sprayed blood everywhere....but after I cleaned that out it felt...better??? So I'm wondering if it was a gum irritation/infection/w.e and not a cavity. That would be a relief. gonna keep cleaning and keeping an eye on it and I guess if it stops hurting in a few days I'll know.
     
  14. Enzel

    Enzel androgynous jrpg protag

    uterus: hey i got you an early holiday gift

    me: no and also fuck you

    uterus: ~*~*~HEMORRHOIDS~*~*~

    at least i barely bleed anymore but it still fucks w my digestive system for a week or so. blergh.

    dunno what's up with the BC. i take it more consistently now than I used to even, though i take it two hours later on the days i don't have work...that really shouldn't be enough to fuck it up tho. WHY.
     
  15. Enzel

    Enzel androgynous jrpg protag

    Got paycheck, did math, this is going to be the first month in a while im not struggling to pay rent. (deep relieved sighing)

    Also when i get my w2s in January gonna do taxes IMMEDIATELY and probably use my return to pay off as much of the deposit as possible. That way i can actually start building up savings again. We want to move next year so gonna need funds for that. Also credit card. Tho i might need to save for a deposit for that.
     
    • Winner x 1
  16. Enzel

    Enzel androgynous jrpg protag

    Some TERF bullshit on my dash

    "oh yeah body dysmorphia is a thing! It doesnt mean you're trans! It's normal for girls to wish they weren't girls!" Uhhhh

    Like people who def have not realized it's a TERF post being all "after all, if you just hate your girl parts and don't want boy parts its just dysmorphia! You're not trans! Being trans means you want boy parts!"

    Me: *is not a dude either* sorry, try again
     
  17. Enzel

    Enzel androgynous jrpg protag

    Note to self. Anxiety meds on monday. (Forgot to refill today)
     
  18. Enzel

    Enzel androgynous jrpg protag

    I may have,...broken my home sewing machine 8(

    was taking in some pants and it suddenly slowed down and started beeping (it's an electronic model with like 40 different stitches, beeping means "im stuck on something so I'm going to stop until you figure out what's wrong :(" ) I poked around and saw a pin...shoved under the needle plate??? I took the needle plate off...and the pin fell into the depths of the machine. so I keep taking out screws to try to get to it, finally do, clear out years of lint buildup, go to put the feed dogs back, and of COURSE i drop one of the fucking tiny screws into the machine. In the process I discover that the original problem was in fact that the UPPER mechanism is stuck somehow and only moves very very slowly when I turn the hand wheel.

    So now I have to figure out how to get the casing off and it takes two hours because there are no instructions anywhere on the internet (this model has a 2 piece plastic casing wheras it seems every OTHER model you can just. screw off the bottom of the fucking machine) so I took out every screw I could find and struggled with it. I finally get it open, find the wayward screw, and hear a noise...and a tiny metal piece falls out of the casing.

    I have no clue where it came from for what it's for and I still don't know why the machine stopped turning to begin with.
    machinepart.jpg

    I am probably going to have to get it serviced which means borrowing a car and I really won't have the money to do so until. like. nearly february bc money is tight rn. which means no more sewing at home. im. ughjhgdfjg
     
    • Witnessed x 3
  19. Enzel

    Enzel androgynous jrpg protag

    I should really close the machine back up but i dont want to until i figure out what the hell the part that fell off goes to...

    I found the repair/service manual for $12 online and am seriously considering it :<
     
  20. Enzel

    Enzel androgynous jrpg protag

    I hate not owning a car

    Yes, i cant afford it and parking in the city is a royal pain in the ass.

    However my partner is disabled and we're subject to the whims of public transport, the weather, how many groceries i can physically carry on my person

    Also, whenever we visit someone, esp holidays, no one wants to fucking help us out

    Aki's family lives over a mile up a very steep hill from the last train stop & their dad is 90 years old and should not be allowed behind the wheel of a car (not that anyone in their family has tried to stop him, apparently???) But asking if anyone else can drive 5 minutes to pick us up from the train is, apparently, a horrible inconvenience

    Every time i complain about not having a car people love to go "ohh but you live in the city! Cars are so expensive! You should be glad you dont have to deal with it!" As if i havent already weighed the pros and cons and the cost (and the fact that we could move somewhere with cheaper rent IF WE HAD A CAR)

    Freedom is a pretty fucking huge perk

    Edit: i also dont really want to have to bust out "well my partner's heart rate spikes to 145 or higher if they walk for more than a couple minutes and doctors arent doing shit about it" every time someone tries to tell me how lucky we are
     
    Last edited: Dec 24, 2018
    • Witnessed x 1
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