Adulting is Hard etc

Discussion in 'Brainbent' started by Enzel, Jan 14, 2016.

  1. Enzel

    Enzel androgynous jrpg protag

    just found out that while the covid test u took in August was free, they're charging me $100 for the special clinic visit I had to go to in order to be allowed to go back to work


    at least there's plenty in my hsa to cover it now...

    dentist tomorrow and gotta calls...nervous abt going for an eye appointment too but its getting to the point where I really need a new prescription bc I have a hard time driving at night x.x
    • Witnessed x 1
  2. Enzel

    Enzel androgynous jrpg protag

    sorting things out for my brain...

    car situation: weird. I finally took it to a transmission specialist & he said initially it was looking like $3000 just to dismantle it and look inside to figure out what's wrong. Discussed w/ Aki and we were like "well the car is old enough that much money to fix it might not be worth it..." so I went to go pick it up instead. and the mechanic said to me he tried a couple minor things and to tell him if it worked by some miracle and he wasn't charging me. (replaced the transmission fluid and patched a leak i guess?) And...its been running fine since...i gotta call him and follow up bc he said to bring it back after driving it a bit so he can make sure the leak was properly fixed. So. fingers crossed???

    I attempted to re fill the coolant myself and was a dumbass and didn't have a funnel so it kinda splashed around the reservoir...I've learned my lesson...I poured a bunch of water on the stuff that dripped on the ground in hopes of diluting it bc I know that shit is like. horrifically toxic. D: cars are...difficult. but necessary...

    money looking...not great this month...but...I've been practicing my digital art and I think I might be able to handle commissions...maybe...

    -keep cleaning/organizing
    -do dishes
    -help aki put up shelves
    -call eye doc and make appointment
    -call car repair guy
    -possibly go pick up laundry and drop off bed frame
    -pick up meds

    -figure out medical bills
    -Aki's medical bills
    -health insurance
    Last edited: Nov 25, 2020
  3. Enzel

    Enzel androgynous jrpg protag

    /looks at the list


    (lmao go me I forgot to go to the pharmacy Friday and now its closed so I have to ration the Adderall I have til Monday...thankfully(?) I missed a few doses previously so I can do that...)

    also hard to feel accomplished when I did do cleaning and dishes but there is still...more of those to do...

    at least i am taking the car in Monday for the follow up repair & hopefully it'll only be $250 like the guy said sobs. he said it won't permanently fix the problem (only the $3k repair would) but it might buy us some 6 mo. to a year.

    so need to remember to go to pharmacy after work Monday once i pick up the car (hopefully)

    bed frame will have to wait still and I need to do laundry again...wondering if I should just pay for a laundry service but I rly can't afford to rn...
  4. Enzel

    Enzel androgynous jrpg protag

    reapplied for UI, hopefully it'll process soon...

    sorted all my medical bills and something...doesn't add up. going to try to call billing next week. it looks like when I first started on this insurance in 2019, there was confusion over my copay and that seems to have muddled things. (a.k.a I don't really seem to have a copay?? even though I thought the paperwork said I did? seems like I'm just supposed to wait until they bill me. I was paying $30 up front which then got credited to my account before the insurance claims processed, and so the payments and bill dates don't sync up and certain payments got attributed to different bills than I thought they did's a mess.) My online account says I owe something like $700 but by my calculations it should be more like $200. I did my best to write down all the post-insurance charges, add them up, then add up what I've paid total and got the difference. so unless there are bills there's no record for??

    Friday at work wasn't too bad...not any busier than a Saturday is usually which was...sort of a relief, but I'm working today and nervous it's gonna be crowded...urgh. I might ask manager for a face shield after all even if it makes my work a pain in the ass...just the amt of customers coming in and out of the store and hanging out near my workstation puts me on edge.

    Also working weekends kinda sucks bc the train schedule is different and throws me off...I have to leave like 1/2 hr earlier and I'm already having trouble getting myself to go to bed on time so I'm just existing on 6 hrs/night on work days. I can't necessarily *feel* it bc my meds keep me awake but I know it's not good for me. x.x annoyingly I was sleeping at the right time for a few days...that I had off...and then the minute I go back to work, this. argh.

    just crossing my fingers I'll be able to make rent w/o letting my credit card roll over this month...I'm tired of asking for people to lend me money I just...want stability...just feels like a never ending chain of roadblocks. I did manage to get thru some of the executive dysfunction that's been dragging me down recently, idk if i just had to wait it out or it was stress abt the holiday or what...Aki got me an art program I've been wanting for a while and using it was really nice, idk why but it's just easy to use and feels less stressful than other ones I have, so I feel like I can actually do commissions now. I did start making a commission sheet months ago and stopped bc I got overwhelmed, but I think I was trying to offer/price too many options and I need to simplify. So going to do only digital for now I think.

    (a couple things are also still blocking me but I hope I can get thru them...every time commissions come up I stress abt possible scamming & art theft, and my deadname being on my paypal...sigh. its honestly less that it's my deadname and more that my full name is...very unique/rare and I'm nervous about being doxxed. I realize that's a bit paranoid but. The internet is scary. I've considered changing my name to my dad's surname which is extremely common because of it. I guess I might be able to make a business paypal but then I'm gonna have to worry about taxes see why i keep getting stuck

    i know some of it is just. things that will be easier once I actually do them and understand the process bc I tend to get hung up on things I've never done before.)

    it's been kind of a rollercoaster...esp for Aki more than anyone. x.x cat seemed to get better and then worse suddenly & now we think she just...idk...needs to be desensitized to the sound of the door opening? sometimes she's ok w it and sometimes she isn't. She's very hard to read...She's been ok with me and I've been making a point to brush her when I have the time and that seems to have endeared me to her.

    I am proud of myself for realizing she was getting overstimulated and stopping brushing her, she has a weird purr so it can be hard to tell when she's happy vs stressed. (it kinda sounds like she's congested tbh) I didn't know that a cat's sides twitching was a sign of overstimulation but I did notice her tail wagging so I was like "hm, she doesn't usually do that while lying down."

    read noelle stevenson's comic abt surgery and I really should to my doctor abt top surgery. I know it's going to be at least a couple years out if anything bc I dunno if insurance will cover it but I rack up PTO fairly rn the big issue is covid...but I may as well get the process started?? my health center is lgbt oriented so I think they have. a process. and advice. I know my dysphoria is affecting me more than I realize, and I *do* realize it...I mentally sort of set a goal for myself the other day to get it done before I turn 35. I think as daunting as everything is, I know I'll regret waiting too long when I'm older.

    I just hope I can find a surgeon who is familiar with nbi people because...I don't want a man chest or sculpting or whatever. I just want it to be flat. not even nipples. (they're useless to me and annoying)
  5. Enzel

    Enzel androgynous jrpg protag

    I MADE THE EYE DOC APPOINTMENT's ridiculous how such a small thing can be so difficult and basically hold up everything else on the list for weeks
  6. Enzel

    Enzel androgynous jrpg protag

    sometimes I feel like a Bad Trans because i picked out deadnames for my characters. like i get why people say "don't ever deadname your ocs, don't even pick one" but unfortunately my own experience with my name is literally tied up in what my name is. Idk how else to put it. I think if my dname had been shorter and I hadn't been going by a gender neutral nickname version since I was in like...elementary school, I probably would have chosen a completely different name unrelated to it, but it is what it is. But I'm also weirdly attached to it because it was a very unique name and no one else had it when I was growing up.

    I was mulling it over because we were getting out holiday decorations and i found this pair of ornaments i got years ago for me & Aki with our deadnames on them, and I got the idea to paint over them and put our actual names on them. but it was actually hard to do mine because i could never find my dname on those stupid touristy junk items. It was like an obsession I had as a kid trying to find my name. So I have that ornament and a mug and a cheap necklace that have the name on them simply because it was impossible to find for so long. it's a more common name now, so I'm trying to let it go, because it *doesn't* actually make me happy to be called by it,'s complicated. I don't know!! a big source of dysphoria when I was younger was relatives (mostly my grandma) making gendered statements about me while playing on my dname. Which would have been cute if I were actually a girl but it was just a source of discomfort.

    So I guess I just...feel like I have to know how a character was affected by their deadname growing up. maybe that experience is different for people who had more common names but mine was *constantly* commented on by people to a level of uncomfortable scrutiny. "Oh, that's such a pretty name" etc and my mom giving me shit for wanting to go by a nickname because ~your name is so pretty that's why we chose it~ (I didn't even realize it was a gender thing at the time, I just thought it was too long)

    with Mhati (trans dude character) it's a bit less important, I guess, there's no real "deeper meaning" behind his name or his deadname, he just picked a name he liked. But for Laelius i deliberately picked out a deadname for him that 1. sounded overbearing and unpleasant to me and 2. has a meaning to it that makes him choosing a different name for himself even more of an act of rebellion.

    I get that people are worried about bigots/assholes deadnaming their characters and I don't feel like I have to broadcast it but I feel bad just. having the names? knowing what they are? I don't know. I had them written down when I made a timeline (in the sense of [x character was born] this year) but I realized that people might take issue with the info being public so I've been meaning to go back and delete them...not that anyone looks at my DW account but...sigh. I don't know.
  7. Enzel

    Enzel androgynous jrpg protag

    somehow squeaked by this month able to pay off my credit card. still need to find another income source.

    this week is going to be dedicated to wrestling w the state health insurance system for Aki bc there's a whole process where you can get subsidized insurance if you're disabled even if you're working. but ofc its deliberately convoluted. We gave up last year bc couldn't wrap my head around it but they got a raise this year which doubled their premium (absurd) so. it's time. unfortunately you can't do that part of the application online...but I need to call the insurance people for some info on how to proceed.

    (technically they can get insurance from their job but its exhorbitantly expensive and covers shit all.)

    ...ofc I paid some medical bills and then I get another bill for ~$600...hooray...going to have to do partial payments bc I only have a third of that in my hsa (it's because I had extra psych appointments this year bc I needed a meds adjustment, BLAH)

    money stressful.

    I kinds hope the eye doctors can re use my old frames bc I rly like them...
  8. Enzel

    Enzel androgynous jrpg protag

    this song is just abt living w ADHD right

    Why you even bother?
    Why actin' like I'm wanted?
    You know me, I'm a fire starter
    'Cause I tend to ignite and it might burn
    I don't even bother, yeah
    I just do it how I wanna
    I know me, I'm bound to break a promise
    No offense, don't make sense, that's who I am

    How come you still think it's just a phase?
    Don't know why
    Can't you see I'm hopelessness embraced?
    I'm doin' okay

    Keep messing up my lifestyle
    Never make it on time
    Realize in hindsight 'cause I'm a fool
    Smilin' upside down now
    'Cause I ruined date night
    Tryna make a joke 'bout how I'm a fool

    I'm not in a mood, not being rude
    I'm just a tool missing a screw
    Keep messing up my lifestyle
    Messing up a lifetime
    Messing up 'til I die 'cause I'm a fool

    I don't know where it started, no
    I've always made it harder for myself
    That's kind of how I want it
    I get lost in my thoughts and I like it there
    When you get all frustrated
    I'm laughing, I'm laughing, I'm laughing it out
    Being bummed is overrated
    You should eat what I serve, think it over
    How come you still think it's just a phase?
    Don't know why
    Can't you see I'm hopelessness embraced?
    I'm doin' okay

    Keep messing up my lifestyle
    Never make it on time
    Realize in hindsight 'cause I'm a fool
    Smilin' upside down now
    'Cause I ruined date night
    Tryna make a joke 'bout how I'm a fool

    I'm not in a mood, not being rude
    I'm just a tool missing a screw
    Keep messing up my lifestyle
    Messing up a lifetime
    Messing up 'til I die 'cause I'm a fool
    When you get all frustrated I'm laughing it out

    My wits are dislocated, I'm rolling without
    Say I'm sorry, I'm sorry but you should know
    I'm not really, I'm happy, you should know by now
    That I'm just a hopeless case, I hope it's okay

    Keep messing up my lifestyle
    Never make it on time
    Realize in hindsight 'cause I'm a fool
    Smilin' upside down now
    'Cause I ruined date night
    Tryna make a joke 'bout how I'm a fool
    I'm not in a mood, not being rude
    I'm just a tool missing a screw

    Keep messing up my lifestyle
    Messing up a lifetime
    Messing up 'til I die 'cause I'm a fool
    Keep messing up my, messing up my
    Keep messing up my lifestyle 'cause I'm a fool
    Last edited: Dec 7, 2020
  9. Enzel

    Enzel androgynous jrpg protag

    I managed to fuck my sleep schedule again by...hyperfocusing on Minecraft...woohoo

    (it is almost 6:30 am and I've been in bed since 1:30 and have not slept bc I've been up til at least 5am past few days.)

    current list:

    -follow up on health insurance shit

    -remind Aki abt medical bills

    -SET UP GAS AUTOPAY THIS WEEK aughghfhf I never did this. apparently. been at this apartment only 6 months and only ever paid the first gas bill!!! thankfully there don't seem to be late fees!!!

    -really really need to fucking sit down and work on my resume. keep getting frustrated bc I can't find the final copy I sent to get my current job?

    -pay some of the medical bills I guess (finally got the paper statement and the cost is all the phone/remote appointments I had bc I had that fun little mental break in August and needed my meds upped)

    - check on UI

    -laundry soon

    -ssssssstuff...there was sth else I'll think of it later I'm sure
  10. Enzel

    Enzel androgynous jrpg protag

    feels like my brain is a container that's overflowing and people keep pouring water into it anyway. I keep losing track of things. there's too much to do and even lists dont help bc they're time-sensitive or time-dependant so I have to remember to check and--everytime there's some new thing to remember it bumps something else out and I have no control over it.

    you know how when you want to pick up something in minecraft but your inventory is full so you start throwing items on the ground but then accidentally picking them up again? that but instead of choosing what to throw away there's just a button that randomly chooses which item to yeet onto the ground.

    I have just sort of accepted that 5-6 hrs of sleep is my life now, I guess. the only thing keeping me upright is the fact that I take stimulants. ha ha.

    what really fucking sucks is that it's no one's fault (aside from, I guess, our shitty-ass govt) and there's no solution except to keep muddling through.

    speaking of meds. need to pick them up this week. sighs deeply

    idk what the timeline on the stimulus check is gonna be but as meager as it is it's going to save my ass z.z

    hit a bad executive dysfunction wall today. just want to sleep
  11. Enzel

    Enzel androgynous jrpg protag

    what I would love to understand is. I take my meds at ~9am on work days. ideally afternoon dose at 2:30. By 9pm at the latest they should be completely out of my system and you'd think I would crash if I didn't sleep enough. but no I just hyperfocus on shit till 2-3am. and the cycle repeats.

    i mean tbf i can take 40mg Adderall and then take a nap at this point. but also stay awake when i should be keeled over. there is...something wrong...with my brain.
  12. Enzel

    Enzel androgynous jrpg protag

    I need a better way to get dishes done...I mean tbh I should not have been like "it's fine that this place has no dishwasher " BUT yanno

    I just. keep hitting a wall w/ the dishes and i hate it. i told myself to do them the minute i get home from work bc doing anything else but brain has been so mush I just. can't. also need to fold my laundry and move the computer junk off my floor.

    eye doc appointment got moved to wed bc of snow ...I just...want it over with...

    I'm sort of (SHRUG) abt xmas... Aki & roommate & I all got gifts for each other but other than that...I guess I get to skip some stressful stuff...
  13. Enzel

    Enzel androgynous jrpg protag

    I think I've finally put my finger on manager wants to be told about every little thing but doesn't actually want to help fix problems. and also for some reason. she just loves jumping to the worst conclusions. if I ask her for help w an issue she basically tells me to handle it myself. but if I take initiative she gets mad abt me "wasting time" bc I'm not doing exactly what she expected.

    ex. yesterday I was starting work on an order and noticed it was something the customer should have been charged for but there was no note on the paperwork abt it. so I asked if she had any idea abt it and she immediately goes "call the customer and tell them they have to pay for it." and I'm thinking lmao WHAT? tell a customer the thing they were getting for free actually costs them money a week after they drop it off w us and get yelled at for someone else's mistake? fuck no.

    turns out they HAD paid for it & the employee taking the order forgot to note that. Which we found out by asking her. which should have been the first step instead of trying to antagonize a customer right off the bat?

    this is just the most recent example...but in the past she's assumed people were slacking when they weren't etc and it's like. just fucking. talk to people instead of immediately accusing them of things and maybe they won't hate your authority so much.

    I miss my old manager...
    • Witnessed x 1
  14. Enzel

    Enzel androgynous jrpg protag

    first thing I am doing once I have some extra money (aside from bills and paying people I borrowed from) is getting my winter boots stretched...holy god the foot cramps

    (is partially my fault for not eating/hydrating properly today but slightly-too-small footwear exacerbates the issue. it sucks bc these are very nice expensive boots that I got thru work for a steep discount, and I can't afford a new pair, but I settled for "my toes just bump the front" bc they don't sell above a women's size 10 nor do they have tall men's boots (???why) and we get knee-high snow here frequently enough. plus I think the toe box needs to be wider. basically my foot fits in them but the motion of walking makes me reflexively contract my foot muscles bc they're a bit tight and...)

    money situation this month is bleh. I had the foresight to put all groceries on my credit card so I'll be able to pay rent but I might be getting hit w interest next month x.x I'm not sure if my bank is still being lenient bc covid or not...

    I did get an extra day (&Sunday pay) this week but p sure that's gonna bump me off UI again and once again back to 20 hrs next week...tired

    mental load is a bit less now that some things are done with but I need recharge time x.x

    thankfully can use my HSA to order glasses. turns out my prescription hasnt changed but I need progressive lenses for work/computer use bc its tiring my eyes out. plus the trouble w night driving is bc the anti glare coating on my current pair is wearing off.

    thankfully I have a spare pair that are ugly as hell but I got them for free when I still had state insurance, so I might send my current pair in to have the lenses replaced since I'm v fond of the frames. either way eye doc appointment was a success and I'm glad my eyes haven't actually gotten worse.
  15. Enzel

    Enzel androgynous jrpg protag

    so this week:

    -order new glasses
    -work on Aki's insurance stuff today
    -sort bills
    -try to tackle cleaning off the porch (I dumped a bunch of stuff there to get the living room cleaned up for xmas but now it needs to be addressed)

    was going thru some old papers & found a poem the friend who passed away last year wrote for me when we were in middle school. just started crying on the spot. it's been a little over a year now and it still...I don't know. I'm not actively avoiding thinking about it but I still get overwhelmed when I do. I still don't know what happened to her, I never asked. and part of me doesn't want to know but maybe I need to in order to get closure. I don't know. when it gets warmer again I do want to bring her some flowers. everything is so much right now.
    Last edited: Jan 5, 2021
  16. Enzel

    Enzel androgynous jrpg protag

    ok I really do not understand our govt processes but I got the $600 stimulus so. I think that saved my ass this mo. still need to math a bit but.

    ordered my new glasses. apparently the website I use no longer just does lens replacement which is a bummer but I got another pair of my current frame as a general/driving pair and then a frame w slightly bigger lenses for work (old frames are too small for progressives). Plus a pair of prescription sunglasses bc my current ones are...I picked small frames and they're not v effective as sunglasses. it was a little bit of a splurge but all 3 pairs together still came out to like...about the cost of a single pair at a regular glasses store so SHRUG. just gotta remember to reimburse myself manually w my HSA once it has the money. am looking forward to my eyes not being tired woo...I just hope adjusting to progressives isn't too hard. I specifically got the short range ones for close up work.

    going to attempt to clean today... my room was briefly, blessedly organized but then i pulled out a bunch of stuff in the pre-xmas flurry and now I have to reorganize all my fabric...(lies on floor)
  17. Enzel

    Enzel androgynous jrpg protag

    today or tomorrow

    -grocery store for cat food, also check list on fridge. need distilled water for steamer
    -check HSA for glasses reimbursement

    -Aki medical records (figure out if can get the childhood ones digitally or if we need to fax the hospital)
    -call health insurance


    made a mistake since...stuff changed on me and I didn't realize something would be a problem so I didn't ask...

    summary is. dude brings in winter coat for zipper replacement. the coat is practically brand new but it's a color we don't currently sell so I assume he got it at an outlet or sth. either way I don't have the right color zipper so I email him to tell him it might take extra time bc I need to order one. its currently almost the date it should have been due bc I had enough work volume that I didn't get a chance to even look at it to know I had to order sth until now.

    well, previously my manager just let me do my own ordering but now we have to email someone at corporate that oversees all the tailors and she orders stuff for us. so I explain the situation to her and she's basically like "sorry can't order that for you, just use another color, tell the customer we cant guarantee replacements will match" (I mean she CAN, its available, but I'm assuming its bc they don't want to spend shipping on a single item?? idk)

    so now I'm like "cool I already told the customer I can get the right color so...thanks" and then my manager comes to me and tells me this customer has in fact brought like 3 other jackets in with broken zippers over the course of the past two years. He's like a zipper breaking menace. and ofc he's convinced it's a manufacturing issue and not that he fucking sucks at using a zipper. and apparently is rly entitled and demanding and now I have to inform him I cannot actually do what I told him I could...aughfhfhfhfh

    /drags hands down face

    honestly considered just driving to a store and buying a fucking zipper myself and solving this problem for less than $5

    the other option is contacting the customer again and asking him why the hell his zippers keep breaking (diplomatically ofc) and if there's something I can do to change I do have a matching color in a different type with one slider instead of two, and I can switch the side of it so it's oriented like American men's coats bc maybe that's an issue he's having? I just wish I knew all this shit BEFORE I CONTACTED HIM IN THE FIRST PLACE THINKING THERE WAS A SIMPLE SOLUTION TO THE PROBLEM aaaaaaaa

    the zipper thing is like...idk. I try not to get super heated abt it because I know people have dexterity issues sometimes but it seems like the majority of people 1. do not grasp how double zippers work and 2. if they screw up and it gets stuck they yank on it too hard instead of being patient and gentle getting it apart and it breaks. like I would love data on whether or not other companies that sell coats have this problem with people breaking zippers! but also very few companies these days do repairs & I think the ones that do are our competitors so it would be weird for me to walk in and ask....
  18. Enzel

    Enzel androgynous jrpg protag

    god, FUCK TERFS

    I automatically block anyone spouting gc shit on twitter but I made the mistake of looking thru this one person's posts first and...urgh

    the minute these assholes start whining about how ~~all the lesbians are leaving bc they think they have to be a man if they're not traditionally feminine~~ I want to surgically remove my uterus and throw it in their faces

    (I mean I want to do the first thing anyway so the second is just a bonus)

    also the way they laser focus on obscure news articles about the one or two crimes committed by trans or gnc people as PROOF that...being trans makes you commit crimes? people only become trans because they want to commit crimes?? I don't understand

    bonus points for "wehhh dehumanizing women by calling them people who menstruate" this isn't even ABOUT YOU. FUCK OOOOOOFF.
  19. Enzel

    Enzel androgynous jrpg protag

    that literally raised my blood pressure as I was trying to settle down to sleep...ughhhhhh

    I'm just extra on edge rn because of everything. (gestures at the entire USA) ...I feel like i say that at least once a week. wonder if it's ever going to change. always stuff to do.

    since I'm here griping. computer fussed at me about being behind on security updates but then spit an error at me when it tried to update so I ended up staying up later waiting for it to fix itself bc it wouldn't turn off. no idea if it's fixed but its sleeping now...I'm so done w windows shit. like I nearly gave myself a heart attack rewriting the whole. partition style for the OS or whatever the fuck and this is how you repay me???? corrupted updates. christ.

    also I'm grouchy bc I did laundry today and washed my slippers (wear them basically all the time indoors rn because my poor cold feet, but they were getting covered in cat hair etc) but they cant be put in the dryer so my feet were so cold all evening while I wait for them to dry...they work well when I *can* wear them but the second toe on my left foot p much constantly has chilblains x.x I'm so fed up w this like. ok so I have reynauds. the solution is...dress warmer... I did I need what a pair of extra slippers when I have to wash my regular ones just because my toes can't get their shit together?

    I feel like the shitty circulation is related to the fact that it feels awkward to flex the toes on my left foot somehow. like the joints feel...stiff? less precise? I can curl the toes on my right foot but the left ones just kind of bend a little and that's it. like I don't have articulation in them? its bizarre. They dont hurt aside from just being ice cold all the time. I've been trying my best to wear warm socks to combat it but idk what the hell else to do. it's such a weird fucking medical issue bc its not the worst thing in the world but it's so. annoying and tedious and I'm worried I'll get nerve damage or something eventually in that toe, or something else horrible, bc its constantly got shitty circulation and nothing I do improves it much.

    could I have worse problems? yes. but also


    I really want like. a week off from work. the problem being yknow. money. I have the PTO but I can only imagine the fuss manager would make
  20. Enzel

    Enzel androgynous jrpg protag

    got inauguration day off because my route to work goes too close to the state capital for my liking

    I would like to lie under my bed and not come out for a month tbh

    ...waiting for my W2 to arrive so I can immediately file my damn taxes...
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