Bad, Hilarious, Or Just Absurd Baby Names

Discussion in 'General Chatter' started by Acey, Oct 5, 2016.

  1. Acey

    Acey optimism and bad vision

    I actually have a friend in a similar situation (albeit less sexual)--his surname is Stone, and let's just say that while his first name is actually a very nice name on its own, it just makes a really bad pun when combined with Stone.

    His first name is Miles.

    His parents named their child Miles Stone.
    Last edited: Oct 5, 2016
    • Like x 10
  2. Nertbugs

    Nertbugs Information Leafblower

    I used to go to school with a guy called Heavenly. His surname happened to be the name of a type of bug.

    I also went to school with a boy called Angel Friend.

    We also managed to persuade a friend with a new baby to give him a very unique middle name. You know in films where someone says, 'My middle name is adventure!' or something of the kind? It's along those lines.
    • Like x 5
  3. ChelG

    ChelG Well-Known Member

    Singer Colin Meloy gave his first kid a normal name. If I've been informed correctly, his second son's name is Milo Cannonball.
    • Like x 2
  4. Vacuum Energy

    Vacuum Energy waterwheel on the stream of entropy

    • Like x 4
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  5. Zin

    Zin Professional Lurker

    There's a local cop whose last name is Slaughter.

    Officer Slaughter.

    ( also a Richard Wang went to my high school. He OWNED the nickname. )

    • Like x 4
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  6. ChelG

    ChelG Well-Known Member

    Back before I was born, my mother's office contained a lady pregnant out of wedlock, which is not a problem until her surname gets involved. She wanted to name the baby either Wayne or Duane. Her surname was Swane. Fortunately she married before the baby was born and I think the new husband persuaded her to name it something else anyway.
    • Like x 1
  7. Mossflower

    Mossflower Well-Known Member

    There was a newspaper editor where I lived named Harry Beetle
    • Like x 1
  8. rigorist

    rigorist On the beach

    My genealogy work has turned up two strange 19th century naming conventions.

    1. Names would be re-used. So, if you had a child Thomas who died, sometimes a later child could be named Thomas.

    2. It was a bit of a fad to give a son his mother's maiden name as a first name. This isn't so bad if your mother is named Davies or Anderson. It becomes ridiculous if your mother's maiden name is Disbrow or Voorhees.

    I have the transcript of a will of a Dead relative with the first name Disbrow. Aside from standard distributions of land and chattel property to his wife and children, he also bequeaths small sums of cash to various cousins who were all blessed/cursed with the first name Disbrow. I call it the Disbrow bonus.
    • Like x 16
  9. Void

    Void on discord. Void#4020

    Norman Reedus's son is named Minugs Reedus.
    • Like x 2
  10. Wiwaxia

    Wiwaxia problematic taxon

    Some of my friends went to elementary school with a dude named Heaven Lee Angel.
    • Like x 8
  11. Saro

    Saro Where is wizard hut

    My family was big into name reuse. There are also some choice names on my dad's side. I gotta call him to refresh my memory on what exactly they were. I'll update when I've got them.
  12. Everett

    Everett local rats so small, so tiny

    i know of a guy who, however many many years ago, got named Darling in the same fashion
    • Like x 2
  13. Secret Squirrel

    Secret Squirrel certainly something

    so I was looking over my lab roster sheet and it's a good thing I did or else I would have called "fey-LEEN" feline in front of the whole lab
    • Like x 4
  14. Aondeug

    Aondeug Cringe Annoying Ass Female Lobster

    I have a fondness for bizarre and confusing spellings of Caitlín. Because they are part of a journey. A long and confusing journey through changing pronunciations. We started with Anglicizing it as Kathleen because th is as close as we're getting to slender t and ee is about as similar as you can get to a long i in English. There were of course variant spellings of this, but still Kathleen had a hold on the populace.


    Because people applied English spelling and pronunciation rules to what was very much not an English word but an Irish one. So because "ai" tends to be an "ay" sound in English and because we have no earthly conception of what long vowels truly are Kaytlihn began to exert her presence.

    with more variant spellings

    a bizarre rush of variant spellings

    FAR MORE VARIANT SPELLINGS THAN YOU CAN SHAKE A STICK AT. With some Kathleens still tossed into the mix. To say nothing of the Catherines/Katherines and Katarinas of the English speaking world.

    You might be a god awful spelling hopefully fake KVIIIlyn. But in a way I love you and desire to protect you.

    EDIT: Well more accurate isn't the proper way to word that. Caitlin is much closer to the typical Irish language spelling of Caitlín though. Given how English spelling works out with pronunciation Kathleen is actually a marvelous spelling in terms of transcriptive accuracy.
    Last edited: Oct 6, 2016
    • Like x 8
    • Informative x 1
  15. Nertbugs

    Nertbugs Information Leafblower

    My mum has been researching our family tree for years. She discovered that we have ancient relatives with the surname Bastard.

    I used to work with a guy called Randolph. Often shortened to Randy. His surname was a common synonym for 'penis'.
    • Like x 4
  16. thegrimsqueaker

    thegrimsqueaker 28 Moribunding Mouse Aggravates the Angry Assholes

    I have a cousin named Street. my sister and I have tried to convince his parents to change the last name to Smarts, but they refuse

    also, in true Texan "oh god it's the first kid we have to make both sides of the family happy" tradition, my brother got both grandfathers' names, along w another traditional family name. so he has two first names, a middle name, and our surname. oh, and for bonus points, his initials w/o the middle name are JKL

    other than that, I went to hs w a guy w the surname "Schmerling," which is really fun to say. and a kid named Skylar Sklarr, which our freshman math teacher really enjoyed poking fun at. I also knew a child named Einar, and I feel so sorry for him every time I remember that
    • Like x 4
  17. Hart

    Hart the answer is no

    I had a classmate in high school who had a brother whose middle name was ? (a literal question mark), which her parents had put down since they hadn't thought of anything and it never got changed.
    • Like x 6
  18. Lerxst

    Lerxst salty parabola

    norman reedus' former fetus mingus reedus

    Also, I just made a plaque for a kid named Jaygo.
    • Like x 9
  19. Lerxst

    Lerxst salty parabola

    From same order: Allexus.

    what the fuck. what the fuck.
  20. Another Shy One

    Another Shy One More books than clothes

    Can i recommend y'all look up victorian childrens name and possibly the horrible histories sketch of victorian childrens name because god damn most of those names absolutely outrageous
    • Like x 2
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