getting diagnosed with adhd is more laborious than i expected?? (just kind of whinging)

Discussion in 'Braaaaiiiinnnns...' started by Socket, Jul 26, 2016.

  1. Socket

    Socket fuzzy tabletop goblin

    I got there in the end!! I am, my dudes, Officially Inattentive.

    Things I didn't expect: this appointment to take 3 hours. CHRIST. My poor sweet Wyrm and her mum were sat outside for 2 hours before I sent them into town to go get cake so they weren't bored to death.

    I also didn't expect to spend so much of those first two hours sort of...asserting that yes, I had these issues before my childhood got Troubled, before I had my post-therapy-oh-god-emotions-how double year of anxiety, that these things exacerbated existing issues rather than caused them. For the first assessment with the first guy I was genuinely worried I was going to be labeled Not ADHD Enough because the focus kept itself fixed on my childhood which I just don't remember very well, rather than my present issues. I strongly pressed that even on my best days, even when I'm not stressed in the least, my inattentive traits are alive and well and I still misplace multiple objects per day and only complete 50% of most multi-step tasks.

    edit: he did seem to get in the end that the reason my questionnaires made me look so put-together is that i'm SUPER GOOD at outsourcing my decision-making to more organised people, avoiding situations that will trigger my BSOD reactions (which is great but it does keep me relatively stagnant if i avoid potential avenues of progress like finding new and better jobs that don't have the safety net of People I Know Being There) and generally i've been compensating for these things most of my life?? he did seem to come around to that realisation eventually

    The second guy was SUPER NICE though and really chill, had a little giggle at some of my answers (especially when I answered his question about time management with the Omelet Story, where I insisted that 20 minutes before work was ABSOLUTELY enough time to make myself an omelet for breakfast and had to practically be shovelling cheesy egg into my mouth while putting my shoes on and even then I was still 3 minutes behind schedule).

    Felt a lot more relaxed after that! He seemed genuinely invested in the idea that it would be really great for me if I were able to work to my potential in my desired areas (i.e. my illustration) which is nice because I was sort of feeling like....well, obviously I'm doing well enough in my retail job and that seems to be all that counts. Whereas he seemed to grasp that while it's great I can manage okay at work, the work I'd really love to pursue is art and it would be really positive for me if I could find ways to help pull together the focus and discipline to manage the things I know I've got in me but struggle to wrangle.

    And yeah, in the end, surprising nobody I'm Absolutely Definitely Inattentive ADHD. And now we get to discuss ways to manage it and see if we can't get me to a slightly more focussed place. :)
     
    Last edited: Jun 22, 2017
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  2. Socket

    Socket fuzzy tabletop goblin

    Reviving my olde thread to gather my thoughts for the newest instalment in the Socket’s ADHD Saga.

    I’m real nervous about pursuing medication? But I guess I’m doing this? I had the opportunity immediately after my assessment over a year ago - I went all the way up to the appointment that precedes the prescribing one and bottled out. I don’t know why. I guess because it’s new and new is scary to me always.

    And maybe it’s kinda dumb that DMing a game of D&D for my friends is what’s spurred me to go “no, I think I want to medicate this”, but here I am? Because god, imagine having a brain that Functions even barely and doesn’t require a list of really basic things to remember just to ensure I remember the ranger has a dog while we’re playing. And I’d like to be able to focus on my art again? I dunno, I worry I’m hoping for too much out of this. I’m here like “oh what if it doesn’t work for me and it becomes this whole process of trying to find what works” and getting overwhelmed by the thought, a little.

    But also i guess if i have the chance to maybe have a better being-me experience, I don’t know why I should keep barring myself from at least trying it and seeing what happens.

    So maybe i’ll be making a phone call later to get re-referred because I think I’m done procrastinating on this? Wish me luck maybe?
     
  3. Mercury

    Mercury 17 Quicksilver Scribe Tramples The Unrepentant

    Luck!

    Medication doesn't ~fix everything~ but it makes life one hell of a lot more manageable.It's kind of like with my cane - using it hasn't made me into an athlete but it has made me someone who is physically capable of leaving the house every day without overwhelming pain.

    I don't have experience with anything outside of stimulants but it seems like in general that trying them out is a lot less fraught than with, say, antidepressants - I noticed the effects very quickly, and if the medication disagreed with me I could pretty much just stop taking it. When I was trying out a new dosage and it was too high, it was just one day and I was like "well, that sucked" and went back to my normal dosage. So finding out the right dosage was annoying, but that's all - just annoying, rather than exhaustingly awful.
     
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  4. Socket

    Socket fuzzy tabletop goblin

    Thanks, that is all super reassuring - I think I work myself up over new things *very very* easily, but realistically I’m sure it’ll be fine and probably even good. :p I appreciate your good words, Mercury.

    Alsoooo getting re-referred was entirely painless, I don’t even need an appointment, they’ve just done it. So that’s cool! Now all I have to do is wait for a letter I guess. :)
     
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  5. Alaspooralice

    Alaspooralice An actual trash fire

    Good luck! I'm on a non-stimulant med right now and that's working for me pretty well! I think usually docs will start you on a stimulant but if you are concerned about the effects you can always ask for a non-stimulant.
     
  6. Socket

    Socket fuzzy tabletop goblin

    re-re-reviving this thread to go AYYYYY two and a half years later (thanks for nothing, COVID!) i got my appointment and i'm finally OK'd for meds!! i gotta get them an up-to-date blood pressure/pulse reading first, which i'll do on Monday, but i'm fairly buzzing about the fact that at long fucking last i can see if the ol' dopamine machine can do its job better with a lil more fuel :D

    we're gonna set out with a stimulant med and then if my body hates it we can try other options but i'm just here like YESSSS FINALLY maybe i'll finish artwork EVER
     
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  7. Socket

    Socket fuzzy tabletop goblin

    ya boi is ME~DI~CA~TED!

    day 2 and i'm still not sure what's placebo and what's legit, but i sat down and wrote 500 words yesterday so :Dc MY POWER GROWS. it's also desperately funny being prescribed meds that are technically only licensed for children because the leaflet is all in Very Plain Text which

    honestly?

    they should always be like that.
     
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