I can has treatment!

Discussion in 'Brainbent' started by Vierran, Oct 30, 2015.

  1. Vierran

    Vierran small and sharp

    So week before last, I finally called the place about the psych appointment and today I had my intake eval. and it was not terrible at all. I am going to have more therapy sessions with the woman I saw, and get medication for depression, and do a depression management class, and get an ASD assessment. I will say this for my insurance/care provider people: when they decide you need treatment, they really cover all the bases.

    The person I saw was reasonably nice, though I kept wanting to tell her to stop trying to reassure me with stock phrases. She paused the eval halfway through to do an exercise about pulling me out of my head, so I'd stop being too anxious to actually explain anything. That was good. Also, she thought of the ASD thing before I mentioned it, and had a number for me to call for an assessment. I didn't feel like she and I "clicked" or anything, but I think we can work together to get my brainweird under control.

    It feels weird but good to have done this, and now I want to tell everyone about it, but am limiting myself to friends and kintsugi.
     
    • Like x 7
  2. Vierran

    Vierran small and sharp

    Updating with thoughts as treatment progresses:

    I've been on 10mg fluoxitine (prozac) for ~ 2 weeks now. I think it is helping my mood, but am worried it is harming my digestion, which is already a delicate balance. Spent the last two days barely able to eat, even though I've been hungry all the time. I'm hoping that smooths itself out in another couple weeks. Today is slightly better, I think. Of course it hadn't really started when I met with therapist again, so I couldn't talk to her about it. Maybe I should email...

    I saw the therapist again last week. She's been big on reinterpreting and replacing anxiety-induced thoughts. As of when I saw her, this wasn't really working, because depression brain makes me really cynical. As of today and yesterday, it's working better, which I'm betting is because of the mood improvements from the prozac. I'm having problems with minimizing things when I see her, and just generally not feeling comfortable telling her things. That's to be expected; I don't really trust or feel comfortable with people, much. I'm going to make a point of writing down some topics before I next see her. That won't be for a while because apparently she's going on strike? I hope her union gets a good deal out of it...

    Depression class is tomorrow, which is fairly terrifying, but will hopefully be good. I am not convinced it will have new advice for me; I've been managing this stuff for a while now.
     
  3. Vierran

    Vierran small and sharp

    Bringing this thread back with exciting updates:

    So, I went to the counselor person twice and then couldn't make myself go again. Got bumped to 20mg prozac around last December, and just sort of kept taking it without, like, talking to anyone about it. Then I started grad school and moved across the country, and my mental health was fine for a while, and by fine, I mean, better than I remember it being ever before in my life.

    And then it was October again, and my parents came to visit, and everything did its usual fun falling apart game. Also, I switched health insurance to my school's insurance, so I couldn't just keep requesting refills of my prescription without talking to a human being. Last week, with about five days left before I ran out, I called the health center to get an appointment. Assumed it would be a 20 minute process of "here, fill out this mental health questionnaire, oh good, you're only slightly depressed, lets keep doing what you've been doing." I was very wrong.

    The questionnaire was out loud, with a student nurse who was obviously not comfortable with the subject matter. She asked me about suicidal ideation, I explained that I've been having some passive thoughts about not wanting to be alive lately, she kind of freaked out and got her supervisor. The supervisor had a very serious conversation with me about was I sure I wasn't going to hurt myself. I told her I haven't been actively suicidal in over a decade, and I'm used to dismissing intrusive thoughts about methods. She was somehow less than reassured.

    She ended up deciding to up my prescription to 30mg, and that I should see the school's psychiatrist and counseling center. She called both places to try to urge them to see me. I was slightly bemused by the effort being put in, but agreed to go and fill out an intake form at the counseling center. Did that, even though there wasn't anyone at the desk there. We'll see what happens from here.
     
    • Like x 2
  4. Vierran

    Vierran small and sharp

    Yesterday I went to counseling center, had an appointment, and scheduled appointments once a week for the rest of the semester (with any luck -- counseling center is overbooked but I explained that if they referred out, I probably wouldn't go). Am in the process of scheduling psychiatrist visit, and have picked up new prescription. So, yeah, being proactive and taking care of myself is, uh, happening? Counselor I saw asked lots of helpful questions like, once I explained about anxiety with authority figures, if she was making me anxious. (Answer: yes, I was dissociating a bit). Am cautiously optimistic about being able to keep doing the thing, and maybe even having it help.
     
    • Like x 1
  5. Vierran

    Vierran small and sharp

    Status report: saw counselor again yesterday. She seems helpful, it was good. We talked about how I always feel like an outsider (even in communities of outsiders) and how apparently I never actually notice I am feeling things? Well, I do, some, but she has a point that I am disconnected from feeling things. Am working on that.

    She picked up on sensory processing issues (on visit 2, fuck you mom) and asked me if I'd ever had trouble with vision tracking, which was weird, because I always considered the vision tracking after school program to be sort of a weird blip that didn't have to do with anything. But she says it could explain some of my social stuff, so that was very cool to learn and think about. We talked about ASD a bit, but having the clusters of symptoms and the words for experiences is more important to me than having exact diagnosis, so we're not pursuing that.

    Today was psychiatrist appointment. It was ... longer than expected, but functional. She ordered blood work, which I thought was sensible. It does seem kind of odd that I got started on antidepressants without having my thyroid hormones or vitamin D checked, so that's going to happen. Yeah. I'm still doing things. Tomorrow after my practical exam, I will call to schedule the blood work.
     
  1. This site uses cookies to help personalise content, tailor your experience and to keep you logged in if you register.
    By continuing to use this site, you are consenting to our use of cookies.
    Dismiss Notice