Okay so I just I've just been reading a bunch of tweets about a first-nation group of protesters at the Women's March in Washington and I just I'M SORRY PEOPLE ARE SO ASSHOLES AND I JUST I DON'T WANNA BE WHITE WHY AM I WHITE WHITE PEOPLE ARE HORRIBLE I'M HORRIBLE BECAUSE I'M WHITE I'M SORRY I'M SORRY I'M SORRY (I'm a quarter-jewish - if my great-grandad on my mum's side hadn't got the fuck out of dodge before Hilter got any real traction in Czechoslovakia. But that's NOT AN EXCUSE and I don't even know what kind of jewish Poppa was??? Scottish-Australian on my dad's side and Yorkshire-Czech on my mum's. I joke that I'm a mongrel but it doesn't change anything.) I just aughhhhh and when I think of the awful things white settlers to Australia did to the native population I just feel sick and guilty and AWFUL and I should just DIE because that's what my asshole dad's genetics deserve. (The white settlers formed a human chain across the island of Tasmania after they'd already done everything they could to kill everyone who was there first - all they found was a little boy and an old man beCAUSE EVERYONE ELSE WAS ALREADY DEAD D:) And there's no way to take it back. I just I don't know what I can do Protests TERRIFY ME I'm so bad with large crowds and I have no money to donate ANYWHERE AND I hate it i hate it i hate it f I'M SORRY I don't know what I can DO I feel so horrible and guilty and there's NO WAY TO TAKE IT BACK I can't undo all the fucking awful stuff people have done to people down the years and I JUST help me I need to stop thinking about it and i CAN'T
Hey, hi. It's important to remember that no single group is a monolithic entity. When someone starts talking about how they hate white people, or cis people, or whatever, chances are they don't mean every single white or cis person. They're speaking specifically about the people who have harmed them in some way, directly or indirectly, and using "white people" as short hand. Not you. It's important to recognize the shit our people have done, the harm we can do if we let ourselves be blinded by our own privilege. To understand how we've benefited off the suffering and oppression of other people, so we can stop it. Or at the very least, embrace compassion. That's what you can do. That doesn't mean flogging yourself with guilt. Guilt is a shit motivator for change anyway, and the last thing any minority needs is the emotional labor of comforting someone's guilty complex over harm they haven't even done. Your ancestors did some shit. White people completely unrelated to you did some shit. Unless you did some shit too, you're not what people are protesting against. You're not evil or horrible. It's okay.
And even if someone legitimately believes every white person is a fucking asshole, there's nothing you can really do about it. Just be the best person you can be -- be thoughtful, try and see things from multiple perspectives, be a force for kindness. That doesn't mean you have to protest or donate money. It just means being kind and compassionate in whatever small ways you can.
I thanks I mean I do try it's just sometimes it feels like I'm one tiny speck against this ocean of awfulness and there's nothing I can do about it and there's nothing that can change it. But thankyou. I did need to hear that from someone else tonight <3
No problem, dude. I understand, it's like....well. Everything Happens So Much. Change is a gradual thing and it requires patience and due diligence. On the days where it all just seems so much, I allow myself some time to just get away from it. Close social media, turn off the news and indulge in a little escapism. Maybe remind myself of how much good there still is in the world, because it is there, it's just that we allow ourselves to drown it out with the terrible and terrifying shit. I hope you feel better soon.
