This is a general thread for reality checks. If you feel the need for a reality check, go ahead and post it here. Like I am! ... Though not very well. Having some difficulty parsing which part of reality I need checked. Screwing with my sleep cycle tends to do that to me. I posted about it elsewhere, I'll just copy-pasta that here and then maybe later elaborate when I can do articulation better. (goddamn, i can pull out a word like articulation to describe how i can't words, but i can't focus long enough to describe wtf is wrong. that's gotta be, like, a record or sth.) ... wow that was too many bluhs.
Im not clear on what you're asking. "Last few posts ive made in (the complaints department thread right?)" changing your mind about how you feel about...??? I like this thread but this might be a better discussion for after you've done some self-care. Meditate, listen to soothing music, have a bath if that feels good. Sleep when you can. You sound pretty fucked up on your own chemicals atm.
I love the idea of this thread btw, subscribing to it so that I can help others / use this resource. Thanks for that! Echoing what Lissiel said though! I know the feeling of that near-manic state, it's awful and twists up everything in your head. Take a breather, relax, self care!
Im not sure if this is exactly what the thread is for, but here's a stupid little thing in the meantime. My friends and i decided to start a freeform rp that was half cthulhu mythos and half dumb teen highschool shenanigans. My character was already posted, was 14. The next character up was listed as a 22 year old pretending to be 18 to get into the school to investigate stuff. I flipped my shit. :( My stupid animal brain was DEAD CONVINCED that this was deliberately making a character who couldnt be friends with mine and that that meant the other player hates me specifically and doesnt want to play the game at all or with me, take your pick and probably doesnt even want to be friends IRL why did i ever think anyone would like me or want to do anything with me etc etc This might be reasonable, if the other player were not my husband of twelve years. :/ brain, i am not amused. But i keep having intrusive thoughts about it all day because why would you do that? All he can tell me is ' i didnt think,' which doesnt help when he had to have had SOME thought process. Any clue? Im probably overreacting? It seems a totally absurd thing to cry over and yet. :/
Honestly I'd be a little ticked off as well. Maybe he assumed your characters were going to be up in the 17 / 18 year old range? I'd be mad but I don't think he did it deliberately, not at all.
I just can't figure out what he *was* doing, and my brain likes to take that as an invitation to make up the most hurtful possible interpretations for me. :/ (And we got to spend like half an hour doing the 'im not saying youre wrong, im trying to figure out what you're saying in the first place' 'ok im sorry, im wrong, ill fix it now' dance before i just said the hell with it and went to sleep. )
why couldn't the characters be friends? they couldn't have a romance, that would be skeevy, but they could have a fun hero-and-sidekick or master-and-apprentice type friendship, or even a "go away kid" "nope" type of dynamic like tony and harley in iron man 3.
Hi, back. Got food, ice water, spent some time in a semi-doze state. Still jittery, but feeling a bit less imbalanced. Also, still struggling to words, but I think it has something to do with the empathy thing, my tendency to get "dragged along" with other peoples' emotions, and whether that's happened re: my assessment of Rhett. I have a really ambivalent, push-pull relationship with my own empathetic response, and throw a night of missed sleep and too much caffeine on top of Drama Stuff (even other peoples' Drama Stuff,) things that should be simple disagreements kinda get blown into "EHRMAGERRDH WHAT IS REALITY?!!1!" ... like this one time when I was seriously unhinged (like, just-got-out-of-the-hospital unhinged,) I got in a flame war with a similarly-unhinged poster on another forum, and someone suggested that we might be the same person. And I freaked out, because I couldn't prove it wasn't true, so like, how did I know I wasn't him? So I was reeeeally relieved when one of the mods told me we were posting from different IP addresses. ... I'm not that bad right now, at least. Whoooo fun times.
Wow that sounds scary as hell! D: Im glad you're feeling better now. Fwiw, i think your assessment of rhett makes a lot of sense. I dont know him well enough to say whether its true or not, but it was internally consistent and plausible?
Okay, after a solid night of sleep, edges-of-reasonable are no longer doing a wavery mirage dance in my brain. Yay! Now to work on making sure the solid night of sleep doesn't turn into a solid day-and-a-half of sleep. Thanks for answering my check request, guys. :)