Scared about seeing my psychiatrist tomorrow

Discussion in 'Brainbent' started by Elph, Jun 7, 2015.

  1. Lissiel

    Lissiel Dreaming dead

    Goddamnit how do you do strikethrough on this forum?
  2. WithAnH

    WithAnH Space nerd

    [ s ]Like this.[ /s ] Without the spaces.
    • Like x 1
  3. Lissiel

    Lissiel Dreaming dead

  4. Elph

    Elph capuchin hacker fucker

    Feel free to steal 'psychocircus whirlwind'.

    I *thiiink* that it's probably statistically less used these days in its 'crazy lady' capacity, and more as a valid concept? Maybe. But the diagnosis is still hugely gender biased. One of my friends sees a therapist who used to work in prisons (like, until this decade, not ages ago or anything). He says that a massive number of the male inmates he saw were textbook cases of BPD, except for their gender - and were therefore diagnosed with other PDs, or anger problems, or whatever. Meanwhile, BPD was an extremely common dx for female inmates, even those who didn't meet it at all. So I think it's still misdiagnosed/overdiagnosed in women, but I don't know if that's strictly as a 'this woman bothers me' thing, or more of an excessive willingness to see BPD in women who have any kind of MH problem.

    For Dr Fuckboy, I think it was a combination of the two. Supposedly it was the clinic's team, not Dr F himself, who first flagged BPD (the day after assessments, individual psychs bring the case back to the team). On the team's behalf, I wouldn't doubt that they consider 'generically crazy + female' to be a sufficient match for the criteria; for Dr F, me annoying him can't have helped.

    Lissiel, I don't know enough about you to comment on whether your dx was correct, but it's certainly something to look into.

    I just... I already knew the criteria & general presentation of BPD. When he brought it up, just to be fair, I did more research. I took screening tests. I looked at personal accounts. Nothing. Literally nothing, even with the things that make people say 'well EVERYONE gets that!!'.

    We left our appointment having 'agreed to disgree' (his words), with him continuing to insist that I was absolutely, 100% wrong about autism. (I kind of wanted to tell him that for the first five years of my depression, I assumed it was simply the logical result of not having any friends. I was certain that the reason I didn't have friends was because I lacked social skills and was 'weird' - my 'weirdness', in retrospect, consisting wholly of perseveration and stimming. From the way Dr F talked, though, I didn't think this would matter much to him.)
    • Like x 3
  5. seebs

    seebs Benevolent Dictator

    What an asshole.
    • Like x 2
  6. ZeroEsper

    ZeroEsper Well-Known Member

    I'm so glad you got through this!! Congratulations!
  7. Elph

    Elph capuchin hacker fucker

    Thanks, but apparently congratulations are slightly premature ¬¬

    I was woken up this morning by a phone call from Dr Fuckboy, trying to convince me to accept a BPD assessment. Reasons given:
    1. 'I did what you asked [i.e. made the autism assessment referral], so isn't it only fair that you do what I ask?'
    2. 'You have only made a lay assessment. I am an expert. The PD assessment team are experts too, and they accepted my referral; that means that a team of experts has decided there is reasonable grounds to dx you with BPD.'
    3. 'The clinic won't refer you for Behavioural Activation Therapy [FFS DICKHEAD, THAT WAS YOUR FUCKING IDEA] without a diagnosis.' (I HAVE A DIAGNOSIS. A FEW, IN FACT. I JUST DON'T HAVE A BORDERLINE DIAGNOSIS, BECAUSE I'M NOT FUCKING BORDERLINE.)
    4. (in response to me saying that, validity of the dx aside, I'm extremely concerned about the huge stigma attached to BPD, and how this would affect my future care) 'That doesn't matter here.' (WELL IT MATTERS TO ME, ASSHOLE, THIS IS MY LIFE)
    anyway, I told him that if they won't refer me for BAT, then I won't have BAT. And that if he continued pushing this, I would like to be discharged from the clinic entirely. (Dicks.)

    @seebs, this reminds me, I've been meaning to write up my Why I Think I'm Autistic piece to see what you think
    • Like x 2
  8. Emma

    Emma Your resident resident

    Well. That was a dick move. Sorry you had to go through that :(
    • Like x 1
  9. IvyLB

    IvyLB Hardcore Vigilante Gay Chicken Facilitator

    eww, doctor fuckboy what kinda boundary pressuring bullshit is this even...
    like I am now mildly concerned about any other ladyshaped patients he ever had if he is ready to manipulate you into 'giving in' about a diagnosis you don't agree on and can show material on why you don't agree, using some sort of bullshit bartering system basis that has nothing to do in a medical context. Doctor Fuckboy essentially works for you he has no grounds to do the 'I did what you wanted me to do now you do what I want you to' thing. the fuck.
    Last edited: Jun 11, 2015
    • Like x 2
  10. Elph

    Elph capuchin hacker fucker just occurred to me that the ICD still has Asperger syndrome as a dx, and that maybe if I'd told Dr F that that was more what I meant by 'an autistic spectrum disorder', he wouldn't be so utterly resistant to it.

    But yes, I'm concerned too. Especially since he was also essentially saying 'I'm going to withhold treatment until you do what I say' (no BAT until BPD). Now, that could maybe make sense if it was a physiological problem, and a doctor was saying 'I'm not going to give you this medication until we do that blood test', and there was actually a really good reason why the results of that blood test affected the appropriateness of this medication; but that's not what's happening here. What's happening is that a psychiatrist is telling his patient that his expertise trumps her (very valid) concerns, and that she can't get help unless she disregards those concerns.

    So why don't I just agree, and go to the assessment, and trust that they will correctly determine that I don't have BPD? Well, that's a good question, and the answer is that I have no reason to believe that my assessment will be unbiased. Dr Fuckboy says the assessment team has already decided that a really common psychiatric condition is, in and of itself, evidence for BPD. In light of that, I'm even more concerned than I was before that said team will not be assessing me for actual BPD, but for the much more common condition which can be described variously as 'hysteria' or 'Disobedient Woman Disorder'. :P
  11. Lissiel

    Lissiel Dreaming dead

    Is there any way you can get care anywhere else? I know resources might be limited but this sounds like you dont trust him at all and that would make for a pretty piss-poor therapist.
  12. Elph

    Elph capuchin hacker fucker

    He's not a therapist, he's a consultant psychiatrist. The therapy being withheld is NHS Behavioural Activation Therapy, at the same clinic, but presumably with a different person. I'm not actually staying in this city for much longer, so it doesn't really matter at this point (thanks to Dr F's ridiculous delays), so I'm thinking I should probably just get the clinic to discharge me, since my mental health is a lot better anyway, and I already see a private therapist.

    The real reason I needed to see a psychiatrist in the first place was to review my meds. In light of this whole palava, Dr F may or may not go ahead with making the recommendation of med change to my GP, but I kind of don't care. It would be cool, but I'm OK carrying on taking what I'm on now.
  13. Lissiel

    Lissiel Dreaming dead

    Well here's hoping your next psych will not be a total incompetent asshole
    • Like x 1
  14. jacktrash

    jacktrash spherical sockbox

    yeah that sounds like you're at the point where you just be like "dude you're useless i'm outie"
    • Like x 1
  15. Codeless

    Codeless Cheshire Cat

    ...To Dr. Fuckboy, BPD really is the new female hysteria isn´t it?
    • Like x 1
  16. Elph

    Elph capuchin hacker fucker

    Looks like it. At least we can form a Hysterical Bitch Mafia, though? *adds Hysterical Bitch Mafia to my mental list of psychopunk battle jacket patches that need making*
    • Like x 3
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