Since exercise often helps! Lately I've been going hiking. The trips are short but it's sometimes on fairly rugged terrain. It really pushes me physically and mentally, but at the same time it's fun. I am not losing weight or anything but I'm actually rebuilding muscle that atrophied during my last major depressive episode where I was basically just eating and sleeping all day for months. Which is fine by me. I don't care if I end up built like a polar bear with my muscles covered in a layer of blubber as long as I'm actually in shape. Because I don't think I've ever actually been in shape! Even when I was a slim child my muscles were weak and had no tone. I mean, my depression and anxiety is always there. Just a few days ago I literally spent all night panicking about college and how "no matter what I do after I get my degree I'll be a failure anyways so why bother" but I am more or less functioning. I am sleeping normal (for me) 8-10 hours, my energy and motivation is a little on the low side, but my cognition is okay. Which definitely is an improvement because my brain runs on bizzaro world logic where the majority of my severe major depressive episodes (hypersomnia, even less motivation and energy, serious cognitive impairment) happen over the summer. So if anyone wants to tell me that "all depressed people need is a pair of running shoes and motivation and not a bottle of pills" I will feel compelled to slap them with photocopies of MRI's from depressed brains until they get a really annoying paper cut on their forehead that stings every time they wrinkle their brow in a disapproving manner.
woo woo woo for exercising! and yeah, losing weight might be a nice byproduct, but definitely not the reason why I've done my best to pilates twice a week. the core strength and straighter spine are way more important and are actual health issues. woo. I do have to find a different place to use for a month or so, since she'll be on holiday in July, but I am planning to try yoga. people I know go to this one teacher and she's said to be very nice and good.
Ugh, I desperately want to get back into the excerzone myself, but ran into a little logical conundrum because (since I started taking an antidepressant) all the really intense exercises like running or elliptical machines turn my trachea into a straw. (Hesitantly hypothesizing that it's exercise-induced asthma, which is treatable, so...)
I have that too, running is pretty much out of the question for me unless I want an inhaler. What I've found is that stuff that requires a shorter, slower, but more intense burst of energy (like climbing shit, or lifting heavy things, or yoga) does not trigger it the way cardio does. My heart rate will go up anyways if I'm working hard because my muscles still need oxygen, but something about cardio working my lungs too fast and too hard makes them want to abort the mission.
I really need to start exercising again. Still have a lot of the core strength from pole dancing for six months, but I don't want to lose that. Might start using my free weights again
Hm. Yeah, I have that issue too. I think it's gotten better as I've gotten back into shape, because ten years of depression and chronic pain + four years of agoraphobia is awful on the muscles, but 'curled up hyperventilating in a corner for ten minutes' is no fun at all. I downhill ski in winter, which is nice, because it has built-in breaks as you go up the chairlift. Summer's harder, though; lots of gardening, and long walks, but still... I haven't found intense exercise that's as fun as skiing. I used to swim, but ... dysphoria.
@albedo Have you tried cycling? You can have really long bike rides :) And mountain biking can be fun (or so I've heard)
Sadly, doesn't work very well for me. I get dizzy if I'm in the summer sun for too long. And that's fine while walking, but biking is... ah. Well. I sorta stopped doing it after falling over into bushes and/or traffic too many times. (I'm probably getting overheated and/or dehydrated, but my best efforts to minimize those haven't fixed the problem.)
... although actually, maybe I could do it at night! That could work, when the days get a little shorter.
If you do it at night, so remember to wear as much reflective stuff as possible ;) You want to be visible for cars.
You're welcome! :) Personally, I suck at it the same way I suck at ice-skating. Other people seem to really enjoy it though, and I am always jealous of those people :P
@Emma that makes sense, as they're essentially the same. I've ice skated my whole life, and I picked up roller skating within a couple of minutes of putting the skates on. Once you've got one, you've got the other, but they're both really hard to start. This is made worse by the fact that pretty much all rental skates are dull as fuck. If you want to try ice skating, buy a cheap pair secondhand and get them sharpened. If I'm scared of skating in rental skates and can barely do it, a beginner is going to have no chance. Trust me. I can't speak as to roller skating; it could be easier in that respect? I don't know.
So here's a funny story: since my break up in end January I've been on a kind of mental journey/emotional rollercoaster. I think the first month was fine mainly because I have slow reaction times and I was too occupied with friends comforting me, getting things done, etc, that I didn't have time for the full brunt of my emotions to catch up with me. Then in March I was miserable, I couldn't do anything - could barely get up, couldn't cook, couldn't read... I had angry episodes where I wanted to destroy something, and many, many bad dreams. That was a BAD dip - I couldn't even hold a pen to draw! I had some contact, fortunately, and I am grateful to my friends and my mother that they kept in touch with me and kept me more or less grounded. At the end of the month, after a lot of worried phone calls from my mother I started piecing my life together again. The only thing is: what life is there left if you don't have a job, no security, no purpose to give to yourself? I'm an artist, and normally I would get over this 'black hole' by working on a new project, but even that was too hard for me. Fortunately I had a gym membership that my ex-husband had signed up for ages ago, (but never made use of) and I decided to take on a personal trainer. I think that has helped me ENORMOUSLY to find emotional stability in my life again. The routine of waking up early on gym days, walking to the gym from my house (a nice brisk walk that takes me past some really beautiful NYC architecture), having a human interact with me, and the exercise itself were such a welcome addition to my life! Especially after the novelty of the gym and the trainer wore off, the exercise kept me going, and it just makes me feel so good. There's the visual aesthetic of having a fit body that is really nice, but also there must be some brain chemistry involved that also helped me find happiness. It's not all thanks to the gym, of course, for that I do have this site to thank for, mainly because the people on here are very open and supportive, and the continuing support of my family and friends. But it was a very big step for me to exercise (hey anxieties!) and now that I do it, it was probably the best decision for myself that I could have ever made in such a situation. Also, I'm becoming pretty good at weightlifting so that's very nice. I'm thinking that after these sessions are over, I want to do something a little more energetic like rowing - I've done the rowing machine and I like the idea of doing this IRL.
@Bel Capricorn Yeah, I am Dutch I had ice skates as soon as I could walk :P I always had my own for the times I would need them, I just really am not very good at it, and I don't like it. I'm sort of physically incapable or have become more and more so over the years. I didn't have the required strength/coordination in my legs, because of hip problems.
I wish I could skate again, but I don't know how that would work. I'm in a state without ice and when I did it before I could just rent my skates. It was through college and it was one of my phys-ed units. I learned how to skate backwards! It was great. I miss it but there's no real way to do it I guess. Just got an alert from my to-do program that I should go work out but I don't wanna. Usually I get on a stationary bike and stay on there for a half-hour or hour and I am just not feeling the mojo right now.
I try to make sure that I am outside every single day during the daytime, even if it is for five minutes while taking out the trash. It doesn't always work but it's a good target for me to aim at, and it does seem to help. Also, when I decide to go "outside" about half the time I end up going on hour+ walks, so that's how I get my exercise.
