No, really, there's no off button. I can't stop it. I get depressed over things and it spirals into baseless assumptions out of nowhere and that just FEEDS the depression and spirals over and over into itself until im sitting in a whirlpool of literal misery. What do I even do? Even stupid things turn into thunderstorms. Like take my GF for example, she's busy doing her own thing. My Mind: "She's bored of you" "She's not gonna spend time with you anymore" "Yer shared BF (we're in a polyamory) is taking her away from you" "She hates you" "She lies to you" I could list stuff for DAYS. I don't know what to do. How to drown it or anything. I've tried all the usual 'pacifier' options. aka. "Find a distraction" or "Breathe". That stuff either doesn't work, ends up ENHANCING the issue, or is again, a pacifier. I really need something more... useful, permanent? Or can become permanent? And please do not suggest a therapist because I work minimum wage, I can't -afford- a therapist. The only option that works isn't viable. I can't nap and sleep all the time, and I don't want to turn to abusing sleeping pills to knock myself out so it shuts up of course.
