user on post moderation

Discussion in 'The Undercity' started by seebs, Mar 8, 2017.

  1. seebs

    seebs Benevolent Dictator

    The point of the science is that I have argued that people are often mad at me, not because of what I actually said, or because of how I wrote it or tone or anything, but because they are preemptively mad at "seebs" and are assuming that what I say is bad, and interpreting it in hostile or uncharitable ways. And other people have said that, no, it's actually my communications being bad, or my ideas being bad.

    So, science: Do people react negatively to posts written by other people, and in particular by people I know most readers think of as really friendly, kind, thoughtful people, if they're posted from this account? Answer: Yes.

    My conclusion is that this is not a matter of my alleged bad communications skills, but of people being hostile to me in a way independent of what I actually say.
     
    • Like x 7
  2. seebs

    seebs Benevolent Dictator

    When I make a post, it goes into the moderator queue until someone approves it. Technically I can approve it myself (which I think is a bug), but that would miss the point of the thing.
     
    • Like x 5
  3. seebs

    seebs Benevolent Dictator

    So there's a thing related to this which has been bugging me forever. I am, much of the time, a solidly skilled communicator. I'm also pretty good at talking to people, listening to them, and making them feel better. Most of the time. And both of these, the failure mode is really very abrupt; I go from "exceptionally good" to "haha what the fuck is wrong with you" with very little warning, and quite dramatically. And I have never been able to figure out why.

    And today, an example of the thing happening caused me to realize, I think, what's happening:

    I only have one Social Processing.

    So, analogy time: I have exactly one Interpreting Language in my brain. If I am listening to speech, and I see written words, I read the written words, during which time I stop interpreting spoken language. I can do either of those just fine, but I can only do one at a time. I can't do two things that require me to interpret language.

    I have exactly one Social Processing. That's all the functionality like "thinking about how people will feel", etcetera. So. If I'm talking about a thing which isn't reliant on social processing, I do it while thinking about people and their feelings and stuff like that to avoid hurting them, because that's just normal courtesy. But if I'm talking about a thing which is reliant on that kind of thought, my tact is completely gone, and I don't even have the experience of it being absent, I just have zero tact or social filter available.

    So, for instance. If I were discussing... forum culture. Or policy. Or things like that. While I was discussing them, the tact filter would be completely disabled and non-functional. Then after I'm done thinking about those things it comes back online.

    And this has the secondary effect that people who aren't able to internalize the understanding that I really am autistic, and social processing is hard for me and not always reliable, see my normal level of tact and compassion, then suddenly very rude behavior, and assume that it's entirely premeditated, when it's actually completely unintentional and possibly not something I can actually do anything about.

    But I think I'll leave my account on moderation because there's simply no way for me to tell when the thing is happening, because the task of noticing that the thing is happening would itself require the social processing unit not to be off doing something else...
     
    • Like x 26
    • Informative x 1
  4. Artemis

    Artemis i, an asexual moron

    This is one of the most relatable things I have ever read and I wish I had a way to have people read it before interacting with me. Both online and offline.
     
    • Like x 4
  5. LadyNighteyes

    LadyNighteyes Wicked Witch of the Radiant Historia Fandom

    ...There are people who can read and listen at the same time? o_o
     
    • Like x 7
  6. Exohedron

    Exohedron Doesn't like words

    Huh. That makes a lot of sense. I was thinking something similar before, that you've managed to talk people through very difficult, sensitive situations before, but seem to stumble a bit with sensitive crowds; some of the crowd is really happy with you, but some of the crowd is suddenly upset, and then the bad communication seems to spiral. Having only one Social Processing at a time explains that issue.

    Also I'm really happy that you were both willing and able to put the seebs account on mod queue. It should address most of the issues I've been qualified to talk about in the last series of debacles, and should do some good towards the ones that I haven't been qualified for. Most importantly, I find it very reassuring evidence that the mod team and seebs in particular are willing to put important limits on themselves and to use the moderation tools available to them to do good.
     
    • Like x 9
  7. swirlingflight

    swirlingflight inane analysis and story spinning is my passion

    when i'm driving people and they're chatting in the passenger seat, they sure seem to think i can understand them while reading street signs....
     
    • Like x 4
  8. seebs

    seebs Benevolent Dictator

    Probably! Richard Feynman wrote about a related thing. He was doing experiments with counting to try to count at a consistent speed. He discovered that he could count at a pretty steady pace, and so could one of his friends.

    One of them could count at a steady pace while reading, but not while people were talking. The other could do it while people were talking, but not while reading.

    The one who could keep time while reading "heard" the numbers they were counting, and the one who could do it while people were talking "saw" the numbers in their head.

    I have met people who can apparently parallel-process spoken and visual language.
     
    • Like x 5
    • Informative x 1
  9. Exohedron

    Exohedron Doesn't like words

    If I'm not getting three continuous streams of input at once I time out and fall asleep.
     
    • Like x 9
    • Witnessed x 1
  10. seebs

    seebs Benevolent Dictator

    Huh. I can do that just fine. It takes more than a couple of words for me to actually lose the incoming speech.
     
    • Like x 1
  11. unknownanonymous

    unknownanonymous i am inimitable, i am an original|18+

    i can, though there is always one that's dominant and one that's not-so-dominant. one i'm focusing on and one that i'm mostly just parsing as the correct (but not always) words. i think i might sometimes lose one when i'm concentrating super hard but otherwise, i can do both. and i think i always do better with the written channel.
     
    • Like x 2
  12. swirlingflight

    swirlingflight inane analysis and story spinning is my passion

    outside of driving i can make sense of at least half of what people are saying, and moderately well infer what they said based on what i heard. the other half of the times people say things like "draw vinnie a bunny" and i hear "draw a vinnie bunny" and make an adorable little bunny drawing that looks like vinnie. the funny times make cute stories, at least.

    but driving is a lot More, more taxing and more scary. if i'm doing anything that takes my attention while driving, then the passengers' chatting drops way down in my ability, or maybe just willingness, to process it.
     
    • Like x 1
  13. IvyLB

    IvyLB Hardcore Vigilante Gay Chicken Facilitator

    I have the exact inverse problem, i usually have Some Kind Of LP or podcast or TV or something on while reading/writing, occassionally talking to someone at the same time, sometimes in two different languages, because my brain screms unless i do fifteen things at once with as much conflicting sensory inputs as possible -shrugs-
     
    • Like x 8
  14. swirlingflight

    swirlingflight inane analysis and story spinning is my passion

    Oh! hey. I thought of a thing. Watching shows with subtitles, I can sorta chat while reading.
     
    • Like x 3
  15. unknownanonymous

    unknownanonymous i am inimitable, i am an original|18+

    i "see" words and numbers in my head when i hear or think them, and "hear" words and numbers in my head when i read or think them. and somehow that never turns into a hall of mirrors, with me hearing something, "seeing" it in my brain and then "hearing" it in my brain in an endless cycle. like, i go through at least one iteration of it a lot of the time, but once that one iteration is done, it doesn't go back to the start and become an infinite echo. if that makes any sense...
    :D
     
    • Like x 1
  16. Minitiate

    Minitiate Delicious

    There might be a confounding variable in your science where 'views you've OK'd' match up to 'views you normally express' enough that people who agree/disagree with your normal views will do the same to the ghostwritten posts because of the similar ideas. But I don't know which posts, so I don't know if they DO match up well enough that that'd be a thing.

    The real science would be for you to ghostwrite posts for other people...? We shouldn't do more of such science at a time / discussion when people are already having troubles trusting the mods, though.
     
    • Like x 15
  17. Artemis

    Artemis i, an asexual moron

    I would be fascinated to see this scienced, but agreed that now is perhaps not the best environment for doing so.
     
    • Like x 5
  18. Saro

    Saro Where is wizard hut

    Agreeing with @Minitiate here. Not a particularly well-designed experiment, and I really don't think you can base very much on the outcome, because there are too many other factors involved that could have influenced the results.

    Sorry, I have really no stake in any of this (beyond being distressed about potentially losing the one community that I've actually felt maybe a part of in many years), but I spend so much of my time thinking experimental design that bad design grates.
     
    • Like x 6
  19. Exohedron

    Exohedron Doesn't like words

    I think if we're going to experiment with impersonating each other, it should be a bunch of people having access to a single account, like the Burgerpants account, that everyone knows has multiple users behind it and therefore can't have authority to say anything. I agree that the seebs account is too powerful to do science with, but an account with the title "Actually multiple users in a trenchcoat" or something might work.
     
    • Like x 12
  20. Minitiate

    Minitiate Delicious

    And people should be encouraged to vary their writing styles / online voices, for extra confusion/fun!
     
    • Like x 5
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