Today I Fucked Up (Or, The Idiot Moments Thread)

So in my family, it is generally accepted that everyone has "idiot moments." Everyone. No exceptions. These are generally just instances where you should know better--and, indeed, do know better--but you derp a little and do the dumb thing anyway. Or you forget something incredibly obvious, or you can't find something that is literally right in front of you, or whatever.

Since they're often rather humorous in hindsight, I figured we should have a thread for them. And as it happens, I just had a doozy of one.

As many of you know, I'm in the process of cleaning my room. One of the things I've done is set up a place to hang things like hoodies and dresses that would otherwise take up too much space in my dresser. This works pretty well, but there are a few small issues:

1. The hangy thing is relatively high up, and thus nigh-impossible to access without me standing on something, such as a stepladder or (more often) my chair.
2. Some things fall off the hangers really, really easily.

Of course, a hoodie decided to fall off of its hanger, so I rolled my eyes and got up on my chair to hang it back up.

Now, the hangy thing is right by my desk, which is, of course, where my laptop lives. I had also been drinking a soda at the time, as I often do, and I had set it right next to my laptop. I should note that I've been using computers since I was a toddler, and this has never been an issue.

That being said, I also haven't often stood up on my chair with A. a laptop and B. a mostly-full can of Monster on the desk right next to me. And when I shifted my leg slightly, I happened to knock the can right over--right onto my laptop.

(We're taking it into the shop to make sure it's not broken--I turned it off immediately and my dad thinks it'll be fine, but it's best to be safe.)

This isn't the first time I've damaged an electronic device out of sheer idiocy, either. When I was 17 or so, I left my DS charging on the floor--and, since I was playing Pokemon at the moment and had just set it down, I had left it open. Naturally, I ended up stepping on it and completely ruining the top screen. (The DS was replaced in short order, since I'm normally very good about keeping my electronics safe, but I still felt super dumb.)

So does anyone else have any stories like this?

 

TIFU: I dreamed I tasted something bitter and woke myself up by spitting on my pillow.

 

i've got a few, but they're not recent.

you know how kids do things sometimes, and when you ask why they say,"uh... i don't know" ? well apparently i had a lot of moments like that. some of the more memorable ones include:

• squirting an entire bottle of ketchup on the wall, then an entire bottle of mustard.
• shoving sticks into the vcr until it broke.
• throwing a book at a balloon in front of my brother's face thinking it would bounce off, but instead it popped the balloon and hit him in the face.
• pouring a glass of water onto a lit light bulb.
• pulling the tape out of vhs tapes and cassette tapes.
• leaning back in chairs on two legs no matter how many times i had fallen over doing that in the past.

there was also the times i didn't check if the right netflix dvd was in the envelope and ended up with a movie that wasn't mine, ditto for library dvds, and all the times i hit the internet button on my cell phone (this was when flip phones were still cool) and ended up racking up my parents bill to an absurd amount.

 

Let's play "how many times has Mushroom not been able to find something right in front of her?" the answer is all the time. Even people. I can't spot the person I was looking for and they were like a metre in front of me.

Also forgetting important things exist, and then when I need them I panic because I have no memory of where I put them because I forgot that they exist.
(I did this last week at prac... I left the book I needed for a lesson on top of the printer and had no memory of it. I am a great and organised teacher.)

 

In the past I've looked for my glasses with my glasses actually on :P

Day before yesterday I was also very frustrated with myself because I couldn't find my pyjama bottoms. Turns out I was wearing them all along. XD

 

TIFU: Spilt a bottle of nail polish remover on my bedroom floor. Thankfully it was only partially full. Cursed, cleaned it up, went and fetched my spare bottle.

Which I promptly spilt all over my bedroom floor.

 

(Hey @Acey , re things slipping off hangers, I've heard that throwing elastic bands around the ends of the hanger stops it, cause a not slippery surface y'know?)

 

I'll have to keep that in mind, thanks!

 

yifu by losing one of the store's headsets for a good twenty minutes. in the end another coworker remembered seeing me in a cupboard and we found it there. (long story)

to be fair, the coworker in question couldn't find the water bottles (they were directly at her eye level as soon as you entered the back of the store)

and the store manager and three supervisors were convinced we were out of [very important product], only for me to find seven clearly-labelled masters as soon as i came in

basically no one i work with came out of yesterday untarred by the brush of shame

 

Aahhh... today I showed up to a class where we were discussing a research paper. I was supposed to lead a group in discussing because I'm a grad student.

Guess who didn't know today was the day we were doing that discussion. ):


(I missed class on Thursday when it was assigned, and usually the prof sends us emails saying what figures to focus on. I didn't get one, so I figured it wasn't today. The prof had a migraine this weekend wasn't able to send an email.)

 

@Avery aw, dude, that sucks.

 

yifu: i was talking shit abt the conformation of arabian halter horses and i said that they had ewe necks when i meant that they were wicked cresty (which is the opposite) and i regret approximately Everything

 

yifu: i set my laptop down hanging off the edge of a table, and my cat barely brushed against it and it crashed to the floor. when i went to catch it, my cat clawed the hell out of my arm in surprise. thankfully the laptop only seems to be cosmetically damaged as far as i can tell.

 

At least your prof sounds nice!

 

So after visiting my partner I was struck with a froyo craving so I took a detour to get home. Got froyo, it was tasty. A note: I am uncoordinated at the best of times but very good at catching myself under normal circumstances. That ability goes out the window when I am tired.
So basically while crossing the street to get back to my car I tripped on the curb, landed hard on my hands and knees, and flashed everyone in the vicinity. Unsure whether my knees or my dignity are more bruised. (Fortunately I was right by the university and I think everyone nearby was drunk and won't remember)

 

I tried to use an outdoor tripod (with spike feet that are supposed to be driven into the ground) on a smooth concrete floor. Predictably, it slipped and almost deposited the very heavy, delicate, and expensive terrestrial laser scanner on the concrete. I caught it. Not gracefully. And that's why I have this giant bruise on my whole right forearm.

I saved the scanner!

But I am a dumbass.

 

@WithAnH shhh you caught the thing, you are hero, the H is for Hero *hugs*

 

Today's fuckup consisted of me being a dumbass and deciding to thin out the raspberry canes while wearing short sleeves, because obviously it didn't cross my mind that sticking my entire arm into a bunch of branches with sharp ends sticking out at all angles would have bad consequences. (At least they're thornless raspberries, but still, washing all those scratches stung, ouch.)

 

this wasn't today but i just recalled when, on one of my quizzes, i accidentally called empress theodora of byzantium "theodosia" as a result of liking hamilton a lot and yeah... i just find that kinda funny and it was a fuck up, so...

 

This is a Someone Else Fucked Up story but I was present and have her permission, so: the bathroom sink in my apartment has no cover for the drain, as it is old and a little sketchy. This means that water drops straight down through the drain and into a pipe with no interference. As does anything else too short to get caught in the bend at the bottom.
This is why we now have two tubes of toothpaste and one cap.