shitposting rave 2, electric boogaloo

It's a matter of application, I presume. Take me, for example. I can't give myself headscratchings, see? But other people can, and I can rub against their legs in return.

 

Are ya a fairy on the downlow?

 

I'm providing some advice and leading him, of course. He grows quite eager with encouragement.

 

*waggles his eyebrows suggestively*

 

... You might wish to consult an ophthalmologist of your choosing, kind sir. As you can see, I am but an ordinary housecat.

 

You can talk, though. Ordinary cats don't do that. But fairies disguised as cats do. And genies and anti-fairies and Pixies disguised as cats, but fairies tend to spend the most time on the downlow. It's part of godparenting, making sure nobody realizes you're magical. Which you just failed, kitten.

 

Meow.

 

WHAT?!? BUT I'VE BEEN ENCOURAGING HIM FOR YEARS! WITH ALMOST NO SUCCESS!

...PLEASE TEACH ME YOUR TECHNIQUES!!!

 

Thank you for sparing us all a visit from Von Strangle!

 

BARK.

 

...I suspect my dear friend Zacharie's approach is a bit more in depth.

 

that would be illegal in most worlds and socially unacceptable in the rest.

 

Oh, so you want a visit from Jarhead, do ya?

 

It's certainly more french.

 

*eyebrow waggle*

 

Alas, I do not know any person, imaginary, illusory, phantasmal, corporeal, present, not present, alive nor dead who goes by that name. I knew the Queen, I knew Dedan, I knew Japhet, I knew Enoch, I thought I knew the Batter. But none of the name you have so kindly supplied me.

 

Well, okay, I guess you can talk all you want than.

 

WELL, AS A COOL DUDE WHO WANTS TO BE THE BEST AND LOOK OUT FOR HIS BROTHER, I CAN'T BE CONTENT WITH STICKING TO MY OWN METHODS!

I NEED TO STRIVE TO IMPROVE MYSELF!

SO WHEN YOU SAY "ILLEGAL," OR "IN DEPTH," WHAT ARE YOU ALL TALKING ABOUT?

 

... you are a pure-minded little skeleton aren't you

 

Are not most brothers cut of the same cloth, pure like fresh plastic on a cold winter morning?