shitposting rave 2, electric boogaloo

Oh my, does that mean that you are part wolf and fish?

 

Congratulations young one, you have successfully used a lightsaber for the first time. You would make an excellent apprentice.

 

No Why Would It?
Sufferer Dammit Are All Humanoid Aliens This Weird?

 

*blows up his own house* And it's CLEAN! TADA!

But snakes are COOL!!!

I will DESTROY THE EVIL OVERLORD LIST!

YES! I LIKE ALL EXPLOSIVES!

*takes a picture of AI's card with his sinister smartphone and then blows up the card*

EXPLOSIVES ARE FUN!

I won't need a PURPOSE anymore. I will finally be SATISFIED.

Take that, Alexander Hamilton! Being satisfied is much easier than you ever thought it could be.

 

Apparently. Better get used to it, Splodessa.

@Starkiller For clarification, we Alternian Trolls are an insectoid species living in a symbiotic relationship with the Lusus subytype of beasts. The Mothergrub is fed collected genetic material from all trolls, and lays eggs from which more trolls hatch. We do not know who our progenitors are, and are instead raised by a lusus - or, in some cases, a swarm of lusii - sharing our blood colour. For Splodessa over there that's a merwolf, for me it's an arctic barkbeast.
(you whistle, and Huskiemom and your pack come running. For the uninitiated, Huskiemom is a huge white huskie, the rest of the pack are four more appropriately-sized and -coloured huskies.)
That's my Huskiemom, and the rest of my pack, which we sort of adopted after we found them orphaned in the snow.

@Burt Destroys the World Burt, I'm not really sure you really have what it takes to destroy the world. I mean, our Condesce has been trying for over fifty thousand Earth years, and... but I'd be willing to concede that you'd maybe have the ability to do so, if you demonstrate the ability to destroy another thing... How about yourself? If you're truly that great, it would be a perfect comparison, and you would've also stopped the only thing that could've stopped you from destroying the world!

 

OH BOY. SHOULD I JUST STICK TO "BOYFRIEND" UNTIL WE FIGURE THIS OUT?

 

*frowns* You think she's my spades? Really, Pap?

I honestly don't think I could stay in the same room as her long enough to get anything started.

And well... just... *sighs* I dunno. I dunno really.

 

WELL... SHE DOESN'T SEEM INTERESTED IN YOU, AND (IF I BORROW THE HUMAN'S KNOWLEDGE OF QUADRANTS), IT SEEMS MORE LIKE THE ASH ONE.

BUT I HAD TO MAKE FUN OF YOU A LITTLE.

 

It didn't sound like you were making fun of me. It sounded like you thought she could actually get in the way of things. Which, okay, is silly since we aren't even doing the monogamy thing, but... yeah. I like calling you my spades. I like having you as my spades. A lot. Even if the way we do that quadrant would scandalize poor little AI. Even if it's debatable whether we're in that quadrant at all.

 

Everything You Do Scandalizes Me.

 

I can just say for myself, i am not weird. I was simply talking about genetics.

Look, i like explosives as the next guy, but what would you do after your satisfied

Oh, that is very informational. Your Huskiemom is beautiful. I like her fur. Your lucky you have a family. My parents were killed in front of my eyes as a child.

 

*gasps excitedly*Puppy, oooooooh, can i pet her?

 

NYEH! HEHEHEH! DID YOU THINK I WAS FEELING INSECURE? OF A NEW PERSON??? I'M MUCH TOO COOL TO GET SO WORRIED SO QUICKLY!

OR... MAYBE YOU WERE?

EVEN BREATHING?

 

Cry Me A Fucking River. And Genetics Have Nothing To Do With Who Your Family Is.

 

Especially Breathing.

 

Yeah, I guess I did think that. I guess I did. That I hadn't established my feelings for you well enough for you not to doubt me. *sighs* Well, that and that you wanted to fob me off on the next person I showed even the slightest amount of interest in and that wanted me back. Like, as Clarissa said, I was pressuring you too much and you were scared to say not to me.

 

Please calm down, no need to be mad. He was just mistaken

 

Youre Cute. This Isnt Mad. This Is Factory Settings.
If I Was Mad Id Be Trying To Fight Him Again.

 

YOU ARE VERY EASILY SCANDALIZED AND MAYBE YOU SHOULD NOT?

-SIGHS- THIS IS THE KIND OF THING THAT MAKES YOU VERY EXASPERATING, YOU KNOW. YOU WORRY SO MUCH, ABOUT SO MANY THINGS! AND THEN YOU TRY TO MAKE UP FOR THE THINGS THAT YOUR WORRIES MADE UP IN YOUR HEAD. IT'S VERY CONFUSING TO ANYBODY NOT IN YOUR HEAD!!!

SO, I THINK I NEED TO REASSURE YOU A LITTLE. I KNOW WHAT IT IS LIKE TO DATE SOMEBODY WHOSE FEELINGS I DON'T RECIPROCATE!!! I WENT ON A DATE LIKE THAT... JUST A COUPLE DAYS BEFORE WE MET? I DON'T KNOW ABOUT DATING SOMEBODY OUT OF FEAR, BUT I KNOW ABOUT LETTING SOMEBODY DOWN... NOT AS GENTLY AS I WANTED. IF I DIDN'T THINK IT COULD WORK OUT, I WOULD TELL YOU SO! AND THEN HELP YOU FIND THAT SPECIAL SOMEONE! OR... SOMESEVERAL???

 

No Really? I Didnt Know That This Was Maybe Not Ideal? Wow Whodathunk.
*raised eyebrow*