shitposting rave 2, electric boogaloo

Long ago our world was ruled by powerful aliens called the Jenoine, who thought it was amusing to play around with the local species - that's why Loiosh is as smart as any human,
Smarter, Boss, if you're the baseline.
Shut up, Loiosh.
and the Dragaeran Houses have more in common with the local wildlife than just their names. Eventually they were kicked out, but it caused a lot of damage to our world. Whatever you imagine when I say "Great Sea of Chaos" is probably not even beginning to be close. There's a place called Dzur Mountain where Sethra Lavode, who knows more about the Jenoine than anyone except the gods, has devices to detect their attempts to reclaim our world. A week ago they started going off, and, to make a long story short, I got sent through a gate that was supposed to bring me to a place where I could learn more about the exact nature of the threat.

 

I Have A Lot of Threats On Offer. What Are You Feeling Like Today, We Have Genocidal Alien Matriarch Conquering The Universe In Two Different Flavors, As Well As A Triangular Trash Demiurge.
And Deadpool. Thats A Pretty Big Threat Too, Though Not As All Encompassing And Really Hes Just Having Fun, He Isnt Malicious.

 

Demiurge? That sounds like it - it took a full pantheon of gods to defeat the Jenoine the first time around. The only thing that can kill one is a Great Weapon - Morganti weapons barely even inconvenience them.

 

PLease Dont Pick A Fight With The Triangle We Just Got Rid Of It.

 

I'm certainly not going to invite it anywhere - I'm an assassin, if I want you dead, I'll wait for the right moment and you'll never know I was there. But if it shows up on our world we'll need to know what it is.

 

Oh Really. You Think You Could Kill Me.

 

*shrugs* Anyone can be killed. I had the entire House of the Jhereg after me and I'm only alive because I'm very lucky and have powerful friends. I have no desire to kill you and I don't do it for hire anymore, but given enough time and research I could probably find a weak point. Do you sleep or have places you go regularly? Do you really know how trustworthy all your acquaintances are?

 

I Dont Sleep. And While I Have A Hive Now Ive Been Homeless Before And Could Be Again. And Those I Know Are Not Necessarily Trustworthy. But They Dont Know Important Things About Me Nor Could They Track Me Down. There Is Three People Who Could And I Literally Trust Them With My Life.

 

*nods* You'd be tough - I'd probably ask so much that they'd be better off with a legendary assassin like Mario, and they wouldn't be able to afford him either. But you aren't my target - this triangle god you mentioned is. What's his weakness?

 

Legendary One Shot Kill Weapons And "Declaring Time Dead" From What Ive Gathered. I Was Busier With Murdering His Lackeys.

 

... Why is it that whenever we meet a new person, there's a discussion of how difficult we are to kill? Why don't we just tell them to practice on the Empire?

Unless you track him down in his home dimension, killing his body -- if you have the immeasurably awful luck to run into him while he actually has a body and isn't just hanging around on the dream plane fucking shit up and messing with people -- will only send him back into his home dimension.
You might have better luck asking Ford, I joined this mess -- my mun says like 9 days ago, but really it feels like a couple of perigees. But I wasn't part of the scientists or the mages either, I was one of those responsible for keeping the triangle's minions off their backs.

 

I Take It As A Challenge When People Call Themselves Assassins. But Thats Actually A Half Decent Tip, Doggy.

 

*nods* That's how killing gods works where I'm from too - what most people think of as killing them is just removing their ability to manifest in our dimension. The Serioli call Lady Teldra Remover-of-aspects-of-deity, and they should know since they created the Great Weapons originally. The dream plane part is new, though.

Interesting world you come from - most people take my profession as a reason to avoid me.
Remind you of anyone, Boss?
Yes, but I outgrew that.
Right. That explains why you're here preparing to go up against an actual god, not just a Jenoine.

 

If I Avoided Everyone Who Is A Self-Proclaimed Killer Id Be Even More Of An Antisocial Hermit Than I Am Already. And Thats Saying Something.

 

*raises an eyebrow* Very interesting world. Remind me not to go there. Although you'd probably get on well with Dragons or Dzurs.

 

The Alternian Empire Is Really Hard To Miss. Lots Of Grey People With Horns Wholl Attempt To Kill You On Sight Because Youre Not A Grey Person With Horns. Not That Being A Grey Person With Horns Will Make Sure They Dont Murder You, Per Se, But You Know. Looking Like An Alien Makes It The Very First Thing They Will Do As Reaction.

 

ooh, backstory

i dont mean for any hatred, but you really hate anybody who walks in front of you, don't you?

 

I can give you a recipe, I have a recipe for everything. Including friendship

 

*shrugs*I don't know. Remember the first few seconds I joined? We kind of almost started a battle that could destroy everything, so..yeah. Also, i agree with you on killing the Empire whether it be yours or mine.

 

No I Quite Like My Matesprit And My Moirails. But Otherwise I Would Agree That I Platonically Hate A Lot Of People And Dislike The Presence Of Others.