shitposting rave 2, electric boogaloo

Well, I don't think your Gods are quite as big as my God. I'm not going to be able to stick a sword into It and call it done. Not even a very fancy sword. Probably not even this .... (she pats the ivory knife, sheathed in her boot) ... not even the very tooth of Death would work.

 

There's a saying on my world: "No matter how subtle the wizard, a knife between the shoulder blades will seriously cramp his style." We may not be able to kill our gods, but we can make life interesting for them.

 

Different Amethyst. You look like the one who lives with us, but...you're not her.

 

I...don't know about that.

One of the things my wife (who came to rescue me at probably the worst possible moment at which I could still be saved, because I was an idiot--I know, what else is new) mentioned was that adults dealt really badly with Weirdmageddon, overall. They all ended up in Bill's throne for the most part.

Children, on the other hand, just accepted what was happening and adapted to the situation, sometimes surprisingly well. For instance, when the statue of Ronald McDonald in front of the local McD's came to life, my wife was the only adult who was able to deal with it, because she didn't know who Ronald McDonald was supposed to be. She is, after all, a catgirl from Dimension 52. It was just another statue doing things that statues aren't supposed to do.

She was backed up in her battle with the hamburger clown and its minions entirely by children.

Some of the other people who handled Weirdmageddon better than most people did included my brain-damaged ex-boyfriend (the one I dropped all the acid with in the 1970s, although that's not where he got the brain damage) and a number of other individuals with a less than secure grasp on consensus reality.

I am not at all surprised that Damara got through it okay while smoking my ex's weed (which I haven't encountered in over 30 years, but I doubt it has gotten less intoxicating) and I strongly suspect that other people in town who may have been doing drugs at the time had a better rate of survival. At least people who have had drug experiences are not naive to the idea of the mindscape and the nightmare realm overtaking their experiences of reality. I don't know that I wouldn't have been able to handle it better with a couple of blotters myself. There were certainly aspects of the experience that drugs could have hardly made worse.

 

One of these days I will get over how much of a hippie you secretly were, unbeknownst to us all.

Today is not that day.

 

I guess Bill couldn't make things any weirder for the drugged-up people than they already were, then.

 

I went to Backupsmore convinced that drugs were for losers, even though I liked the Grateful Dead. But half the faculty were acidheads, and they invited the students they liked to their parties. Then Fiddleford.

That's really all you need to know, Stanley.

Bill is not as creative as he would like to believe he is.

 

Bill does have a very inflated opinion of himself. And an inability to differentiate between chaos and creativity.

 

Bill is an asshole. I can't believe I ever liked that creep.

 

Indeed he is.

I presume he acted much more charming when he reeled you in.

 

Oh, yes. Much more charming.

Also, if you had written me in my twenties up as a DD&MD character, it would have been appropriate to give me an intelligence of 38 and a wisdom of -6.

 

You were basically the kid in all the horror movies who says, "Look, here's the videotape they were talking about at school where everyone who watches it dies! I'm gonna play it at my slumber party!"

 

...thank you, Stanley.

 

With the sheer number of people in your house right now, if you still were like that, the videotape would end up with quite the body count. Thank God you grew out of it!

 

I didn't know you were a theist, Pearl.

 

I am not. It's an expression that I picked up on Earth.

 

Ah, like when my wife says "Jesus" despite the fact that she's a Tempter and I'm Jewish and there's absolutely no reason at all for her to use that expression except that I have been known to. (But I don't thank Jesus for things, although I have been known to say that if he exists I wish he'd get his fandom under control.)

 

I think so.

Though now my player is recalling that my dimension apparently doesn't celebrate Christmas and so maybe there really is no way I could have picked up "thank God" there.

 

You have a dimension without gods? Sounds promising.

 

Honestly, most of the beings that are worshipped as gods in the vast majority of dimensions are nothing of the sort.