I am actually here for a specific reason. I'll copy and paste my problem: I'm not Black. I'm Asian and I support BLM, I even joined the local chapter. For the past seven or eight months I've slowly devolved into a nightmare. My roommate and I have been trying to have a conversation about minority activism and BLM. It's culminated with my white, 57, Conservative Republican, cishet male roommate claiming I am causing severe anxiety attacks in him because I am with a "terrorist organization", and that I have given no evidence that they are not. He is bringing in his devout Christian background and "forgiving" me and hoping we can still be friends despite his fear of where I might end up. He says that he tries to live by his Christian values and should have "known that others would not live by the same values". I've actually had to block him from my phone because he'll send me all the "evidence" of BLM's terrorist activities and "assassinations" of cops at all hours of the day and night. Not short links either, but entire walls of text. I am...at a loss for words. It's gotten to the point where I am desperately emailing members of different college minority clubs to try and get someone, ANYONE, to help me figure out what to do. I emailed my local BLM chapter and finally told the entire horrifying situation. No matter what links or how I explain, he keeps claiming I did no such thing. That I never showed any kind of evidence that he is wrong. I'm...yeah. I bought two different kind of door locks because I've actually become frightened of him. He's so sincere in his beliefs that he'll barge in at 3 in the morning when I have a 12 hour workday ahead of me just to try and "debate", where he'll bludgeon his opinions on me in my own room. He just won't stop. He wrote an entire letter to me about how he feels about it too. It's all him, him, him, and how BLM makes HIM feel. I scanned the letter and I'm going to share it because I feel like I'm livingin in a surreal Alice in Wonderland world. I just...don't know. I'm so freaked out by him. I'm taking all of my anti-anxiety medications, my anti-psychotics are not helping, I just feel like I'm under constant attack by this friend. ----- I'm debating on uploading this letter. I also locked and screen capped one of his "debates" with me via text. It's just more of the same thing, for months on end. I just feel cornered.
Wow, what the fuck. I see two possibilities. One, and I must stress that this is extremely unlikely, is that something's gone really wrong with your anti-psychotics and some or all of this is hallucinations. I don't think so, though. The other is that he desperately needs antipsychotics. Like, this sounds a whole hell of a lot like onset-of-psychosis. Except that he's... 57? That's way old to suddenly be going psychotic. And I have no clue, but this sounds pretty dire. Like, that kind of massive overwhelming obsession? Absolutely a mental disorder, and yes, I think it's probably dangerous. There's a lot of things here I'd regard as markers for schizophrenia, honestly. But at this point, my advice would be: If there is any way you can get the hell out, do. Like, consider crashing on people's couches or something. This situation feels like something that is sufficiently disconnected from reality that I would be genuinely concerned for your wellbeing.
@seebs, @rigorist As soon as I get home, I'll upload a few text messages, and the letter. At this point, I just...feel like I'm alone. I'm making it all up. This way people can see if I'm overreacting and if I need to adjust my medication. I'm taking 500milligrams of two anti-psychotics and 40milligrams of an anti-anxiety.
Uploading letters for reality checks sounds like a good idea. Fine imported drama, top serket and is this abuse are all not visible to people logged into the forum, if you want all this somewhere non-searchable and somewhat hard to find. Also, even in the very unlikely event that you are overreacting, I would still suggest trying to find another roommate if at all possible.
