All Aboard the Floating Dumpster: Trash Ships Ahoy

Oh, trash ship that nobody but @keltena and @blue will know what I'm talking about: this Protea/Dias anon was me. It's not headcanon, but it makes me laugh.

Spoiler: tl;dr on the characters for everyone else

Three of the main antagonists in Radiant Historia are Queen Protea and her advisors Dias and Selvan. Protea is a stupid, shallow, egotistical asshole, and Dias and Selvan use her as an easily-manipulable figurehead by keeping her entertained with luxuries while they mostly run the country. The game doesn't directly imply that Dias and Selvan are a couple, but it's a really easy conclusion to make, and probably intentional- the devs made a crack in the artbook about the fact that in one sidequest you find out they regularly meet in the bedroom of a hotel. They're besties and bitch at each other about their absolute disdain for Protea over wine on the regular. They keep her in power for as long as it's convenient for them, but betray her in both timelines.

Dias is hands-down the prettiest person in the game, and is prone to throwing tantrums when things don't go his way. Selvan is hands-down the snarkiest person in the game.

Hence why I think this is a potentially-hilarious trash ship. :::PPP

 

.. When I saw that ask I just automatically read your name into it, and was just surprised to find out it was actually on anon :P

 

I admit, I did not do a good job of disguising my speech patterns, but I wanted plausible deniability just in case. :::PPP

 

re: fenders: *appears and quotes self from the dragon age thread*

 

fenders.jpg

 

((comment moved because i figured this was a better thread for it))

anyone here watch AMC's Turn? Because i ship Hewlett <3< Simcoe to hell and back.

 

@hyrax ohhh man bless you for this rec. i will dig into it IMMEDIATELY

and i have not heard anything about turn. please tell us more, because if it's a gross enough ship i will probably start watching. (i can be persuaded to do a lot for Shipping, it is a problem)

 

Turn: Washington's Spies is about the Culper Ring, the first domestic spy ring in the U.S. it's set during the American Revolution, and follows a couple of friends from Long Island who start spying for the rebel American army. there's some definite trash ship potential, mostly revolving around Simcoe, the antagonist, who is very aggressive and creepy. Hewlett and Simcoe basically function as foils-- they're both British officers, and they both represent aspects of the British Empire. Hewlett is the patronizing, "civilizing" side of Imperial rule, while Simcoe is the side that enjoys abusing the power of Empire. they're at odds a lot, especially in season 2, so of course i ship it. :D

also, George Washington is in it, and everyone has a daddy kink for him.

i'm surprised it's not bigger with tumblr, honestly, since it overlaps a lot with the first act of Hamilton! George Washington is a character, Lafayette shows up, Charles Lee is there, etc. the first 2 seasons are on US netflix right now, and i think s3 just started on actual tv.

 

... yes, this exactly is the kind of Fenris/Anders I would be 100% into. And which I will probably have exactly zero luck finding anywhere if I search after beating the game.

 

@Choco wait, did I rec something? or did you mean to tag Hyrax?

 

.... yes, I did. Whoops XD

 

I've noticed I seem to have a thing about moirail pairs that make each other worse. I think Kankri and Cronus would be adorable pale, but they enable each other pretty badly as it is. Come to think of it, Cronus' creeping on Mituna seems a bit pale, though I think he's just testing out all possible varieties to see what works. Outside Homestuck, Luke the Warrior and Ranguvar Foeseeker liked each other and worked great together in the situation they were in, but I could see outside that situation they'd just fuel each others' bitterness and anger.

 

@ChelG oh man, that's my jam too. for me that's the best part of Hannibal, season 1. actually i didn't even ship Hannibal Lecter and Will Graham sexually in s1-- to me that season is about Hannibal offering to be Will's moirail and then consistently making him worse. it isn't until the final episode of s1 that Will realizes he doesn't have a moirail... he has a kismesis. (my Will Graham tag on tumblr was "get out of there you poor shithead". spoiler alert: he didn't get out of there.)

 

This is my favorite kind of moirail drama (and really the only way I can see ScourgeSisters)

 

@Aviari Me too. I was fully expecting the Scourge Sisters paleship in Act 6 to blow up in Vriska's face, and that was yet another let-down. (I think I've come to the conclusion that overall I love the characters and the ideas but I don't particularly like how the plot is executed. That happens, I guess. Sorry for the tangent.)

Speaking of conciliatory ships, anyone else like Meenah auspisticising Cronus and Mituna? Someone really should.

 

Auspistism via a firm boot in the ass, sure :D

 

Does anyone have a trash sedoretu?

 

yes, but it's an oc thing.
(a not even canon oc thing, because these four are problematic/terrible enough when they AREN'T in a relationship)

 

Ah, so I'm not the only one who has OC crackships.
To be fair, the two could actually be considered as moirails, I guess...

 

faaaaar from it
(there are two? almost canon pairs with my ocs. everything else is trashy crackships)