The Wizarding World of Harry Potter (a thread for Potterheads)

actually you know what it reminds me of? minus the time travel it's the same kind of fuckery as the phantom of the opera sequel.

 

theres...... a phantom of the opera sequel....?

 

I was hoping that the Phantom of the Opera sequel had a dumb time travel plot.

 

there's a phantom of the opera sequel and it's terrible.

if you have 2 hours to kill and you hate yourself you can watch it on youtube

 

Well I do enjoy a good self hate induced watching of terrible shit.

 

HELL YEAH how much knowledge of the original is necessary? bci haven't seen that since i was like 12, might need a rewatch

 

honestly not much. the more knowledge of the original you have the less sense this will make lmao

 

sweet
thanks for the link! :D
gonna use this to bribe myself to actually do apartment hunting \o/

 

I'm just here laughing because A Very Potter Musical (which for those of you aren't aware is a PARODY STAGEPLAY) did a time travel plot for A Very Potter Sequel... AND IT ACTUALLY WORKED, IT MADE SENSE. LIKE. IT IS PROBABLY ONE OF MY FAVORITE TIME TRAVEL PLOTS OF ALL TIME. Which possibly works because AVPS is so utterly irreverent at the source material, but.

I'm laughing so hard right now, AVPS took the "Voldemort's allies travel back in time to try and stop Harry from killing Voldemort" thing and ACTUALLY MADE IT WORK.

 

also I should note that my absolute favorite part of that summary was adult!Draco still snarking at Harry over getting his face in the newspapers. A+ Draco Malfoying, the most in character thing in the entire summary.

 

Wait ok so like

Spoiler: Spoilers for jesus fucking christ

I??? Why did Theodore Nott make a Time Turner for Lucius??? Why does Lucius need one? How does how lonely it is being Draco Malfoy play into anything?????? Why did Malfoy threaten Harry and then be like "lets TEAM UP AND SAVE OUR KIDS" is he THAT bad at Slytherin??????

 

@Arxon

Spoiler: lord almighty

if theodore nott could just make a time turner- technically TWO time turners- anyway without anyone knowing why is that not a big deal???

 

Hahaha what the hell is going on jkr

 

You either become a giant troll like George RR Martin or you live long enough to see yourself become Anne Rice.

Editted because the joke was crass, bless you PTerry.

 

Can we not talk about Pratchett dying in this case? Especially when I still haven't read the last two books to preserve my memories of the discworld.

 

so like,

Spoiler: UM.

can we talk about the fact that voldemort did the nasty??? like. when and how and what the fuck. motherfucker came back without a nose but hey his dick's still in fine working order it's aight.

 

Spoiler

"His real father could be voldemort" are these children like... incapable of basic math. And does scorpius apparently look nothing like draco because, well.

...oh apparently this is a. Frequent rumor. You know ok can't someone just look at the birth dates, scorpius is eleven, the epilogue happens 19 years later, and I'm pretty sure time turners don't let you go FORWARD in time. Also holy shit if there was a spare time turner WHY WOULD IT BE IN HARRY'S POSSESSION FOR EXACTLY REASONS LIKE THIS. I mean wizards are stupid enough to allow a kid to have a genuine time machine but still!

...and how does an eleven year old steal a time turner. Oh my god. And - time continues to move while you're back in the past, that's not how it works, also oh God those kids are going to be 20 years old when they get back because time turners don't go forward. And oh my God these kids are idiots and I know they're eleven but still. And - did nott just make a bad time turner or something?

...since when was Hermione minister for magic? And oh my God what is this child that is not what an Augury is.

 

Spoiler: large image

I'm around 80% sure this is a fake summary of what happens, but on the other hand, stageplays aren't always as sensible, and the randomly jumping scenes + characters being introduced and then fading out again would make more sense in that context. If it is 100% real, I will die of laughter, and it will make up for how fuckawful her worldbuilding has been recently. By being even more awful than that.

 

Oh god dammit.

Spoiler

Her name is Delphie. As in Delphi. As in the Oracle of.

 

Spoiler: Maybe she did GRRM'd after all

I mean, it's not sitting on your last two books and actively putzing around while your fandom screams about your health and age, but "my Twitter feed is no longer canon, but My Immortal and A Very Potter Sequel are!" is certainly up there.