Fruity Rumpus Asshole Party - D&D Edition [Closed RP]

"I seriously question the advisability of just sticking your hands in strange, dark holes but hey, if that's what you're into."

Lei glances around, trying to make sure that whatever dirt grubbing creeper scurried away from here originally doesn't come back and surprise them.

 

[Lei, roll perception.]

 

Pyralspite keeps digging at the dirt, trying to make the holes wider so she can perceive what's at the bottom clearer.

 

[11 this time. What do my elf-eyes see Rose?]

 

Pyralsprite digs a sizable hole in the cold, dark earth.
Lei, meanwhile, scans the area. A rabbit hops into view nearby, briefly. It snuffles at the air as it approaches, and then its ears flatten against its head and leaps out of sight.

 

Lei sees the rabbit startle and does the same, crowding into the big dragon woman's space. His now wide eyes continue trying to look everywhere at once.


((credit @KathyGaele))

"Hey, uh, you want a candle or something? I just saw a rabbit, there must be warrens in this field. Maybe that dude was just super hungry for Thumper."

 

When the hole is large enough, Pyralspite pulls her shield out, then starts herself as a nervous elf crowds close to her. She shakes her head, attempting to sniff out anything in the bottom of the hole.

"I don't need light to see, and unless rabbits use thermal hulls I don't think this was a rabbit hole."

[4 perception! Bluh.]

 

You see dirt. A lot of it, in fact. It's all cold.

 

["Tez I'm pretty sure these pre-industrial revolution shmucks don't have 'thermal-hulls,' they seem to still be working on figuring out electricity.]

"I don't know WHAT you're talking about. Anyway, it's dirt. Unless you have some kind of special dirt knowledge I dunno what you're hoping to find."

["Rolling for 'special dirt knowledge.' That's a 9."]

 

Lei peers down at the dirt. Looks like dirt.

 

Lei is too nervous of the fucking spooky fuck to justify staring at dirt for any significant period of time. He continues scanning the surrounding field for movement while addressing the tiefling.


((Credit @KathyGaele))

"Yo, demon dude. You're magic right? Is that some kind of fancy magical dirt?" Lei is negative amounts interested in the mystery dirt. For all he knows the ground is meant to be colder than the snow on it. He just wants to figure it out or exhaust all their options so they can go.

 

Nowhere Mann hunkers down next to the dragonborn, peering at the dirt. He reaches out and touches it, and it is, as reported, fucking cold.

[11 arcana check]

His fingers tingle at the tips when he concentrates. A strong, unpleasant buzz against his skin, like pins and needles. He gets back up, wiping his fingers on his trousers, and reports that it does seem to be magical dirt.

 

Closing her eyes, Pyralspite clasps a hand around her locket and casts divine sense. There's definitely something up with this dirt.

[Divine Sense: detect good and evil with an action. Until end of turn, know within 60 ft the location and type of any being sensed, and presence of any place or object that's been consecrated or desecrated. Use 5 times/long rest.]

 

You reach out with your divine senses, and recoil. The earth here has been deeply tainted. You can feel it, an infection seeping through the soil and spreading deeper with every moment that passes. The evil clings to you, like a thick coating of grease.

 

Pyralspite makes a disgusted noise, reeling back from the hole and scraping her tongue against her teeth to try to reduce the amount of evil grease on it. "This dirt is evil," she announces, and gets hastily to her feet.

 

Lei dances back when the lady moves, and takes a few steps further at her pronouncement.

"Evil in what way exactly? Is it going to mess us up somehow?" He looks at the ground under his feet warily. "What do we do? I feel like there's protocols for this. I wonder if the village has a young cleric and an old cleric."

 

"The earth here has been deeply tainted. I can feel an infection seeping through the soil and spreading deeper with every moment that passes. That figure we saw clearly desecrated the ground in some way. I don't see why the ages of any cleric we find would be important, but we should definitely seek them out." Lei might say strange things sometimes, but they do definitely need the help of a cleric. Keeping her shield on her arm, Pyralspite starts to head hastily towards the village, calling to the other two as she does.

"There's not a moment to lose!"

 

Nowhere Mann still seems sort of spaced out, so Lei takes his arm and scrambles after Pyralspite. "Yes, just leave us here, I've always wanted to be murdered, raped, and eaten (probably in that order) by evil, deranged hill folk that desecrate things. It's sort of a dream of mine. Come on demon dude! I won't have you stealing my ambitions out from under me, no being cannibalized for you."

He literally cannot stop talking, even when his breath starts to come in short, painful gasps. Here's a discovery; running in the cold is not fun.

 

You make it into the outer ring of buildings. The town is built almost in circles, with the largest and most important buildings in the center.
[Roll investigation, all of you, to find the church.]

 

[15, that's actually not horrific.]

Lei looks around, still holding on to the tiefling who seems colder than he should be.