All Aboard the Floating Dumpster: Trash Ships Ahoy

The magical thing about Hetalia is that all you have to do is Google up wars and you now have something terrible to ship. :::PPP

 

Russia/anyone was my trash heap for a good long while. put anyone you want under him, lithuania, poland, america, whatever, it's gonna be horrible

 

So many incest ships, though we don't know if nations even can reproduce sexually so maybe it doesn't count, and my fave ship which gets referred to as incest actually isn't. (Oh Balticest, why isn't there more of you?) Platonic fucked-up family dynamics are awesome too. And fucked-up friendships. And then you have all the squick inherent in the fanon view that conquest = rape; personally I like it better deconstructed. (LJ community das-sporking had an appropriate term for it being played straight, which they used to refer to a bad hentai manga; "Will the Real Sex Offender Please Stand Up?")

 

So I played through Metroid Fusion again recently and was reminded of my childhood love for Samus/Adam. I liked the idea of creepy abuses of power and so on. AND THEN OTHER M RUINED EVERYTHING FOREVER. MY SHIP IS TAINTED.

TAINTED.

why

 

"NO WRONG KIND OF CREEPY"? :::PPP

 

It's less that and more that it was so poorly fucking written. In theory that SHOULD be my kind of creepy. As is though the writing is just so...stale. And annoying. The bigger problem was Samus than Adam. Though I have issues with how he was characterized as well. Samus' personality in that game is just a constant fucking annoyance though.

 

Me: *sees jack and rhys standing next to each other not looking at or acknowledging each other at all while scrolling through borderlands art*
Me: *nearly chokes on gum*


I am the trash man, the trash man is me

 

Currently, Mercy from Overwatch domming the shit out of mother and daughter Ana and Pharah. Dubcon incest, yay.

 

i've been listening to a bunch of Paul Shapera's musicals and in particular The Dolls of New Albion

the character Byron is in love with the character Jasper. this is terrible because:

• Jasper is his grandfather (but Byron doesn't know this)
• Jasper is dead
• Jasper can't really communicate (and this is central to a lot of the story)

in conclusion, Byron why

 

Well, I'm going to listen to The Dolls of New Albion.

 

Theon and Ramsey are quickly becoming my shit.

 

DEFINITELY TELL ME EVERYTHING YOU THINK ABOUT IT

 

byron no

 

Theon/Yara is also my shit. She is off doing things that don't involve being sexily tortured though. SADLY.

URGH.

 

Spoiler: kink feelings

A good day for an unknowing incest kink, and an especially good day for a subverted incestual feelings kink. I'm excited to sit down and listen through this (hopefully in the near future.)

 

Well so I just went for it immediately and my feelings are this: I get why literally everyone and literally their grandmothers is so down for Jasper because after Elysian Night I am too. What an amazing song, what an amazing presentation. I love this deathbot?

That was... super weird! Super fucking weird, vacillating (in my opinion) between amazing and hokey, somehow. Like, sometimes it was just spot on (Elysian Night, Annabel's entire story arc, The Old Trunk In The Attic, Priscilla Contemplates, Jasper, everything about Jasper, everything he says or does, holy shit) and sometimes it just felt so... soap opera that goes on for too long, and, seriously, military dictatorship out of nowhere? Pacing could have been better. There's a reason you usually set up characters for more than three songs before you kill them.

There were a slew of weird things like that (who was writing the lyrics and why didn't they even try to edit) and yet I still feel amazed and really happy about this thing??

This is one of those surreal things that can only happen on the internet. Which is one thing I love about the internet, piecemeal overblown projects that are mysterious mishmashes of amazing and weird and incomprehensible get actually put together instead of left to die in one dude's mind and then you get shit like a bisexual voodoo-practicing nihilist helping a dead man in a robotic body run for mayor, the dead man in a robotic body he happens to be deeply in love with, who happens to not care about him or politics and also be his grandfather, long story. The representation we deserve.

The lyricism was REALLY cool, I'm going to need a few listens to unpack some of that. Especially the lines between Jasper and Priscilla, a LOT was packed into a few rhymes there.

What the heck was all that man wow

EDIT: and, by the way, byron YES

 

He's literally too fucked up about this beautiful dead guy at home to form meaningful relationships with other people, what am I supposed to do with this, I'm fucking laugh

 

yeah, idk what's up with the lyrics cause like ????the music is so so good and then the lyrics are misspelled and just flat out wrong sometimes?

annabel's arc is GREAT and i love her and i want to hug her. "It's like a dream where no one calls me failure if I don't succeed" no come here, let me hug you, you're gonna be okay. edgar's arc is my least favorite because fuck him tbh he sucks, but The Old Trunk In The Attic is one of my favorite songs. byron's arc is probably my favorite because hell yeah voodoopunk and also Elysian Night. And Priscilla. Priscilla. Her songs are so pretty.

Spoiler

"Hello Police?" priscilla holy shit

the military dictatorship is a big thing in the sequel, btw, so that's why it exists.

in conclusion: vote Voodoopunk, we dance with you on your graves!


also you should listen to A Slenderman Musical by the same guy, it's fucked up in different ways!

Spoiler

two characters have a threesome with the slenderman and it's just as weird as you'd think

 

Call out post: Bel Capricorn

Makes me listen to a whole lot of musicals because he gives me hooks like that

Spoiler: Threesome with what

I imagine that works like it did in Hyperion. Not at all and they almost die

 

Spoiler

idk what hyperion is, please tell me more

: D i feel so powerful

Spoiler

the one character is having sex with the slenderman, and the second one enters the room and it takes him all of TEN SECONDS to go from "dear god, what are you doing?" to "let me too come in"