I made Enoby's gemsona. Spoiler: exactly what it says on the tin It didn't have a lot of lace or fishnet options and limb enhancers were the best I could do for combat boots, but I did my best. :::PPP If you want to know why fossilized ebony is faceted, the answer is "becus fukk u prepz."
What about the episode with the pizzas? Jenny said she'd never seen the side if the beach with the temple, and kofi thought they were a circus act. They also have problems receiving mail, and until Sadie's mom came around jamie was supposedly "the only mailman who knows where [Steven] lives" which makes me wonder if theres some sort of gem effect going on? Even with their fence up in the past they were pretty surprised when greg showed up, which makes me wonder if unless you are already involved with them you probably can't easily know about the gems without specifically trying to know about them. If that makes sense? Either that or everyone's learned to keep out of gem related events (even if they don't specifically know they're gem events) because of the danger inherent. Edit: why is strikethrough i didnt tell it to do that Edit again: fixed it?
I'm still a couple episodes away from being caught up but I just wanted to let you know that I already managed to yell at @Void about Lapis for a while and it came out theory-shaped, namely: I have seen a lot of half-theories about Lapis and I don't have anything to link you to but my conclusion is that Lapis might be some sort of scout sent to planets that Homeworld /hasn't/ eviscerated yet. Waterbending powers really do not seem particularly useful on planets that the gems have already settled and hollowed out, but they do seem useful on places like Earthlikes. She can show people /exactly/ what she saw, which means that she can play back things for other gems to analyze. She's smart, so she can operate on her own judgement when orders can't account for changing conditions on the ground. She has wings instead of an attack weapon.
that'd also fit in with how she wasn't supposed to be on the battlefield. earth was already a colony, and a contested one. even if she was involved in the colonization process— and her skillset really is impressive!— she should have had nothing to do with the planet at that stage. my question was: why didn't they just send lapis(es) in to gather up earth's ocean and shunt it into space, or simply lock it into a single easily-defensible pillar? most organic life on earth would be dead in a week from how badly that would fuck the weather up, and nearly all of it in a year or two— an eyeblink, for gem command. the ocean could be put back afterwards, too. also i mean if they were going to expand the earth's crust out into weird orbital lacework, why not simply take the earth's oceans and drag them across the continents a couple times? like, scrubbing. landbased life drowns and ocean based life is pulverized. you might have a bunch of tiny organisms still left alive afterwards, like bacteria and hardy plankton, but it'd probably take care of anything bigger than a quarter... i guess the atmosphere would be a huge pain in the ass after that, since gems don't need to breathe but are still affected by wind, and you'd probably be dealing with enormous supersonic hurricanes all over the fucking place... but you could always come back in a couple thousand years when shit's settled down.
that's the frustrating thing about evil empires in children's cartoons. you get characters with incredible powers that are never used efficiently, because the empire can only be a certain kind of evil. so the writers are like 'hey whee she has ocean powers, she'll steal the ocean, that's dramatic' and then they're like 'okay, we can't.. .we can't actually animate the billions of people who would die in the megastorms and tsunamis from this one event. can't do that. whoops.'
like seriously all you have to fucking do to win a fight with earthlings is drop a half-mile meteor on us from space. that's it. pow. we're gone. bye. i feel like any contest of earth vs extraterrestrials should explicitly state why the aliens aren't just throwing a small rock at us and waiting a little while.
What do you mean, organic things need water and to breathe? Can you imagine someone like Yellow Diamond even wanting to know these things?
okay that would be the funniest reason for yellow diamond to be like 'okay well shooting and punching the humans and rebel gems to death did not go so well, we'll just blow up the planet then'. like no, hon, that is so extra. i mean like im pretty sure an impact strike on the order of what took out the dinosaurs would also shatter gems! and even if it didn't, they'd be really fucking busy digging themselves out from under all the flash-fried debris.
Honestly with only a handful of crystal gems left, they could just launch an invasion again and it'd probably succeed (except for plot reasons of course).
I didn't think they cared about killing organic life, though. The organic life was just not on their radar. They were concerned about the Crystal Gems, because those were a clear and obvious threat, and they were concerned about extracting Earth's resources, and that was it. Nothing native to Earth was likely to be able to kill a gem, humans hadn't even developed farming at the time of the war, and "protect the things living on Earth" probably wasn't on the ideological radar for most of the CGs, who were a lot more interested in the fact that they were trying to throw off Homeworld's oppression. If you were an oppressive regime, you wouldn't worry about trying to eliminate a particular species of lichen that grows on buildings from a city which was in anarchy because of a revolt.
Again, they don't care. They've already given up Earth as a colony world- they essentially nuked the site from orbit and it's overrun with weird mutants. They've completely ignored it for 10,000 years except sending Peri to check the Cluster because they don't care enough to make a second attempt, this time with murderous monsters running around that can kill Gems they have limited resources to make. Since the Cluster makes the planet a ticking time bomb anyway, there are a million things for them to do that are less risk for more reward.
um five thousand years ago humans had several empires. it was the bronze age, there wasn't just farming but cities, monuments, writing, and sophisticated mathematics. egypt built the pyramids with teams of construction workers and sumeria used the quadratic formula to calculate agricultural land allotments. humans at the time could not have stood up to things like guns, lasers, orbital bombardments, and gems the size of sugilite. but if connie can fight gems, a twelve year old girl with a sword, i'm pretty sure akkadia (which conquered the entirety of mesopotamia at one point) could have fielded a useful army.
wait, it might have been six thousand years... there was still some stuff going on then too, though. eta: ok here we go, "The Rebellion or the "Gem War" was an event that occurred approximately 5,750 years ago, according to Garnet."
Hm, I wonder how much of Connie's fighting ability to take on Gems is because of 'any human could do this' or 'Connie after training with Pearl and wielding a magic sword can do this.' Then again, Sadie managed to kill a Gem monster with a sharp stick, so probably the former?
I think I must have had 10,000 years in my head because of Pearl's "I've been a criminal for 10,000 years" line. Which would have been around the dawn of agriculture. I still don't think Homeworld cared about organic life- if they wanted to build something, they could just wipe out what was in the way, same way you don't have to burn down an entire forest to build a house next to it. And a lot of their structures are in places where they wouldn't have to worry about most of the local wildlife (humans included) wandering in anyway- underwater, whatever that thing around the Lunar Sea Spire is, floating in the air, etc. Their main concern was the Crystal Gems, not any of Earth's native life.
