sorry i don't make the rules: ridiculous/lighthearted headcanons

The Big Bad also does a lot of DMing, and his idea of a good time is dropping first-time players in the original Tomb of Horrors.

 

Canonically, my favourite character does play D&D (or Dungeons, Dungeons and More Dungeons, which appears to be his world's version) but we never get to actually see a campaign except for the one he runs for a 12-year-old who's trying to out Monty Haul him.

IDK. I like to think he'd be one of those Vast Amounts of Worldbuilding DMs, if only because he's been to zillions of different dimensions to get inspiration from.

 

Brief break from DnD headcanons/AUs to add: many, many things in both the Ace Attorney Investigations/Gyakuten Kenji games make far more sense if I assume Edgeworth has an untreated concussion from when he got knocked out at the start of the third case of AAI, and he's not exactly firing on all mental cylinders for the duration of both games.

 

I feel like he'd also be one of those DMs who has a big elaborate plot planned out with all sorts of twists and turns and a ton of NPCs fleshed out, which gets derailed in the first session because the players don't do what he expects them to do.

 

(My fave, meanwhile, had to panic-text Lippti and Teo in the first session for advice on how to stop one of his players from trying to murder the first NPC who hires them. Because said NPC was secretly a shapeshifted dragon and Marco's character was going to die horribly.)

(Marco is That Guy and trusts nothing and no one because of unfortunate experiences involving the Big Bad's aforementioned fondness for Tomb of Horrors. He showed up to the first session with a completed character sheet for a minmaxed druid but switched to a rogue when he realized nobody had a way to detect traps. He is still mad about this. At one point he threw a tantrum because he thought everyone else was playing stupidly and declared he systematically murdered everyone else's characters, and everyone agreed to pretend that never happened and that he was not getting a share of the treasure for that dungeon.)

 

Of course, the most important question about any group of characters playing DnD is clearly, "Who's the one who rolls to seduce pretty much every NPC?"

 

Cronus would but no one will play with him anymore.

Porrim does and it annoys Aranea who is trying to have a serious session.

Aranea doesn't flirt with EVERYONE but she does like to have the Marquise flirt with many people.

 

As for Kencyrath Timmon is the one who rolls to seduce all people. The one time Jame remembered that that was an option she failed and fell down a staircase somehow instead. Grimly forces Tori to roll for him because he is a wolf. A wolf who must seduce all. Tori and him bicker about this every time it happens.

 

Jame only seduces by accident, unless she is in predator-dancer-mode anyway. And then she doesn't remember it.

 

Roxy flirts with all the hot elves. So does Mabel, for that matter.

 

The idea of predator-dancer mode being triggered by a fucking trpg is just. Hilarious to me. Just suddenly the dice all fall in the right place and also everyone has a boner and is confused about what happened. Why is Timmon out the window? Where did this horse come from? Are Tori's pants down?

 

If anyone could take a trpg really seriously it would be Jame. She'd be the one coming up with the completely crackpot plans to do things -- that work.

 

The Hetalia cast have so many issues already I just love the idea of this level of nonsense happening if they try (though I think they'd all know better than to expect the players to help Hitler).

 

I imagine that would frustrate Tori. I mean. It is just a game. Also why would you think that plan would work. How did that plan work. Can we just do something sensible for once that doesn't involve the towns throwing us out. Why did I think this would be fun. Relax Grimly said. This will be fun. FUN. OF COURSE. WHILE MY SISTER IS THE POPULAR ONE DESPITE BEING A DANGER TO THE PARTY.

poor tori

 

Well, we only have a day and a half or so left to come up with ridiculous Vivid Strike headcanons without having the knowledge of actual canon, sooo...

Fuuka Reventon would have a badger as a patronus. She is also inordinately fond of waffles, loves professional wrestling, and in a tabletop RPG would TRY to be the paladin who fights for good and justice and all but ends up shifting berserkerwards very often. She would like to have a wall full of plush toys, if circumstances allowed. If she was on a world that had Voltron as a TV show, her favorite paladin would be Shiro. She would be a Prospitian Knight of Rage.

Rinne Berlinetta would have a hummingbird as a patronus. In her spare time, she whittles. She would like to learn how to play the piano but has not had the time or money to do so, ever. She'd like to be good at sewing, but isn't (Fuuka, surprisingly, can sew pretty well.) If she was on a world that had Harry Potter, she would write Drarry fanfiction. She would be a Dersite Maid of Breath.

 

Oh god, yes, Mabel would be such a terror for that. "DOES HE HAVE LONG, FLOWING SILKEN HAIR" "Uh..." "DOES HE LOOK LIKE ORLANDO BLOOM"

 

Another important D&D headcanon: Dave plays a rapping bard.

 

i headcanon norm the genie doing that.

 

Norm, unlike Cronus, might actually strike lucky.

 

yep. he's actually got moves. :D:D:D