shitposting rave 3: Dawn of the third rave

[i do so.]

 

*Everybody out of the goddamn way. He's got hair full of grease, a fist full of suspicious purple fluid, and a head full of empty.*

 

... Anyway.
While that self-cest party over there is doing their thing anyone want to propose the next topic we can talk into the ground? I personally would love another round of debate on the academic merits of objectivity, but I think we've gone over that quite thoroughly.

 

Cap. Cap no that's not even the fun kind of torture. No objectivity debates I beg of you. [He manages to keep a straight face, but his wings flick with amusement.] Anything but the objectivity debates.

 

Best boooze? Best card game? How to kill people to make sure they don't get put back together by a stray medic? Most ridiculous situation you've found yourself in?

 

The kind you don't taste for the sodium 'til you're completely fendered preferably with ridiculous amounts of glitter

The one you win obvs ;D

Be law enforcement and have access to a smelter.

Does fragging Primus count? Because that is both a crowning achievement and completely hilarious can you imagine what the fraggign priesthoods would say? The looks on their faces oh sweet Epistemus

 

Awww you never let me have any fun, darling.
-she is giggling.-

The booze I make.

You would make me choose a favorite among my children, would you? I love them all equally, they are all special in their own way, and all of them require a different kind of finesse to cheat at them.

The bombs I make.
I like taking care of my problems from the ground up you see.

I think I have to second Venture there.
Not that that actually happened.
Primus isn't real after all.
-shifty optics.-

 

Ooh I get a pet name now? I feel special :P [He drapes an arm around her shoulders. Personal space and respect for rank? What are those?]

 

★>d(,,･ε´-,,)⌒☆

 

For getting drunk? A scrumpy we looted off a dead Templar in Fereldan. For taste? Some ridiculously strong rum Varric got me as a gift once, from a friend who stopped off in Rivain.

Wicked Grace.

Fire works very well for that, I've found. Also tearing people to bits with the Fade itself. And Dorian has this trick of turning people into bombs, which is all well and good when it's not a bloody bear he's just done it to.

Having to put an Avvar on trial for throwing goats at my castle.

 

[Good thing she doesn't mind at all, leaning against him casually.]

[She rolls her optics at Primus. Pff.]

Oh dear. How does one turn organic fauna into bombs, if I may ask?

 

I'm not positive of the mechanics, but I do know it's something to do with the school of magic he's trained in. Necromancy is a few steps removed from blood magic, but it has some of the same effects.

 

You - pffhahaha - you had the goat guy too?!

 

Yes. Very first Inquisitorial duty I get given and it's a man... with a goat. Honestly, how anyone ever took us seriously is a mystery.

 

I mean they are full of chemicals just not at the same concentrations as us

...or magic. Magic works.

 

like picking them up and throwing them or like with a catapult

first one seems funnier second one seems like itd be a pain to clean up

second one also seems like a waste of goats

both seem like cruelty to goats

except near me

 

fascinating! I fear I am not very "magically" inclined, but nevertheless, more strategies are always appreciated.

There's a lot of ways I know of to make people explode in messy ways.
This is one is new, though. I like new knowledge.

 

I must admit, it is nice to be believed about the whole magic thing. If you like, I can ask Dorian whenever he falls asleep to show you the spell?

I've got a talent for mines, myself. Those don't require tying life force into the trigger of something though, so they're must less difficult to cast.

The first, because my life is a comedy. The goats seemed to be mostly unharmed when we retrieved them, and were a welcome addition to our supplies. The Avvar... less so.

 

This is dreamland man. If I can believe in all the resurrections and cross-dimensional jetfuel and whatever I can believe you have a thing you do in your homeland that you call magic however it actually works :P