shitposting rave 3: Dawn of the third rave

Yikes, my mech, what all's goin' on with that, need a few vids to take yer mind offa that?
[Ratio hops onto the bar, something disgustingly sweet and overly complicated in his cube.]

 

[He-- doesn't!! Flinch!! From the organic. It is small and furry, not large and scaly. It's okay, probably, as long as it stays away from his vents.]

I... don't think my treats are the kind of treats you can handle, little guy. [He curls a little more over his cube, not particularly inclined to share.]

None of us have rotors, thanks, and I didn't want to be fisting anyone's cubital joints but here we fraggin' go anyway!!!! Ugh. [Ruffly uncomfortable wings.] Remind me to hug the next Cybertronian medic we meet. Is a hug completely out of the question, sib?

Iiiii don't think I can pay for... whatever you're offering. [He pulls a face. It's porn, isn't it, isn't this guy the future porn distributor from the diplomatic ship. Porn is the opposite of what he wants right now.]

 

[Libre is not smiling, nope. He pokes Ratio] Get off the bar you menace.

 

-the biggest, saddest mi eyes. So sad- Mii?

 

Don't pull a face like that, wings, my treat an' I got a whole lot more than what you're prolly thinkin' I'll offer ya. Got some sweet aerial vids of a buncha colonies from their flyers. Also gotta few sweeps across Cybertronian towns from before the war an' all. Just tell me if ya want somethin'.

 

[Scope lifts his clawss and lovingly walks optic first into Paradox's leg. He stands there for a few seconds, and then slowly wraps his arms around the limb.]

Sib, a hug is the least I can do for your tragic wreck of a fragging self.

 

Bro. Libby. Bro.
Get on the bar you nerd.

 

What, does the engex taste better up there?

 

I mean, if you want the unholy combination of paint stripper and clockpolish, I'm pretty sure a whole pile of you could share a fingerful and I'd have the rest of it to myself, but what kind of rads can you little terrors even handle? Not that I don't appreciate the opportunity to fry a few organics right now, but...

...are the files locked to a single recipient, or are they easily shareable? I... know someone who could probably use something like that right about now.

[He leans down, forehead resting on the bar, to wrap an arm around Scope's shoulders. This is totally a hug.

No it's not, but getting a real hug means getting off the stool, and that involves more exfun than he's got right now.]
...thanks, sib.

 

Mii! -a mi sniffs at the engex, sneezes- Pet mi?

 

I got your back, sib. Or leg, as the case may be. But that's fragging details, ain't it?

[He pats Paradox's knee very carefully. There there.]

Slag off, it's my turn.

 

Yeeeeeeeeep it does an' also I want a huuuuuuug
-the most demanding imperious "Hug Me" gesture.-

Sure are shareable, my mech, ain't no biggie. Y'all want it on a slug or direct transfer.
-He actually manages to say that without waggling his optic ridges for once. Who woulda thuk Ratio is capable of something resembling propriety-

 

[One hand for gunfriend, one hand for booze... no hands for mis. Drink or mis, drink or mis... eh, if his drink gets stolen he can just magic up a new one here. He releases his cube and drops his newly-freed hand towards the mi. If it's smart enough to talk to him, it's smart enough to show him how it wants to be touched.]

[Amused:] I've got two arms, sib, and I love you but I don't think I can turn enough to get at you with both of 'em from this position.

...and yeah. Know ya do. You're just awesome like that, yeah?

...transfer. Dunno if I'll be able to take a slug outta here with me. Slag, dunno if I'll be able to take a transfer out, but between the two of'em... [He shrugs.] You want a jack or plug from me?

 

[He will not make itweird he will not make it weird he will not...]
Plug me hard babe.
[... nailed it.]

 

I could climb you. Are you offering a climbing range, sib. I'll climb the slag outta you and no one can stop me. They teach you how to climb in spec-ops.

[He donks his optic against the leg.] I am pretty awesome. At climbing.

 

[He pulls another face, but thankfully it's mostly hidden by the bar. Good table, best friend. That's a lie, Scope is his best friend. Good table, good friend. There. Internal narrative settled, Paradox drags himself back upright and clicks open a hatch in his forearm to unspool a cable and offer it to Ratio.]

Awwww, you got into SpecOps with the bots? No fair. [He is only mostly joking.]

But yeah, if you wanna climb I am here for the... [wow no that was going for more unnecessary innuendo. Dammit Ratio.] ...I'm here for you, you know that sib.

 

-drags him down into his lap, hugs- You´re a brat.

 

-the mi arches its back and rubs into the hand, purring like the teeniest chainsaw-

 

@Paradox of O:THHE Do you... want some help with that? It doesn't look fun.

 

Wow you almost had me going there. Yeah, sepc-ops was cool, tossed around like a buymech at a race dontcha know. Slagging fantastic.

[With effort, he hauls himself up Paradox and manages to insinuate himself into his lap.] Aw yissss.