shitposting rave 4: (almost) anything goes

oh. uh, thank you, but i think it stopped. it's just all - and believe me i hate to say this as much as you will hate to hear it - crusty in there now. (sigh) it'll work its way out eventually.

 

"Thanks! I never turn down good wishes." Mabel smiles. "We kind of had to get it together. We went through an apocalypse together."

"Just like you and Ma'Vali!" Mabel says, grinning. "To be fair, I had been in a lot of fights without having fighting lessons, so a lot of my initial tactics relied heavily on biting, kicking, sheer fury, and unlabelled uses of craft products. You can do a lot with a handful of glitter, some nice sharp knitting needles and a can of spray paint! Plus, I never go anywhere without my grappling hook!"

 

7h47'd 480u7 d0 17, y34h. 4h, 70 83 y0ung 4nd 50m3h0w 3v3n 57up1d3r 7h4n 1 4m n0w.

 

I think our handler cut down on the number of jobs we'd have to go in unarmed because we made it a challenge to see how many new and interesting things we could use as a weapon.

My favorite was the one time with the chicken, three Q-tips, and a hot glue gun. I think that's when she stopped giving us those jobs, actually.

 

*Sniff snif. Frown. The fuck is that smell and why is it so familiar.*

 

*It's Time™.*

 

more fuckin doppelgangers?????

 

uh, no, clearly im not a doppelganger because theres only one of me. and thats the vway it should be, because alternia couldnt handle a second me.

 

(stop talking stop talking stop talking stop talking)

 

-picks up both orphaners with a pair of tentacles and smooshes them together, wondering if they'll cancel each other out-

 

the fuck?

 

*Congratulations! Instead you get accidental selfcest.*

*Or, maybe not so accidental, in the case of @Neophyte Orphaner. Either way their faces are definitely smooshed together.*

 

Why are there so many dopplegangers? This is absurd.

. . .?! When'd you get a haircut?

 

(reed does the staring-over-lowered glasses thing for about thirty seconds before taking the glasses entirely off to rub despairingly at her face with her hand)

...guess i tempted fate on that one. i should know better than to do that by now, huh? hey, kid. hey, mini-me, you--

(sees @Cassie Volante) ohshit ohshit ohshit

 

*He wonders if this is the universe finally calling him out on being such a terrible person, and is surprised it took this long.*

 

(whips her head around to the source of the voice)

.... doctor glass?

 

Mabel ponders this. "Chicken as in dinner or chicken as in alive with three sharp ends? And was it a high or low-temp hot glue gun? Because high temp hot glue is nothing to laugh at, ouch!"

 

Dipper snickers. They really are all alike.

And he has got their gun.

 

-bonks them together like dolls for laughs-