shitposting rave 4: (almost) anything goes

Oh, no, not me. My friend. If he were here. I'm not into getting into relationships soon.

 

do you honestly think identity theft is the same thing as dating?

 

*coughs* Well personally, I wouldn't know. But who would even steal the identity of you? That seems like a hassle.

 

no, genius, itd be me stealing the identity. thats the entire point of 'get me someone elses and i wont have to use yours'.

 

it won't be you fucking the job.

 

-Clover pokes Cronus curiously.-

 

Here, take this. *gives a card to the cat that has a man with a fedora and a large amount of fancy clothes on him* Will this do?

((If anybody knows this person, I luv ya,))

 

*He squeaks like a broken dog toy.*

hey hey hey hey. hands off. i have to CONSCIOUSLY CHOOSE to do it and im not some kinda circus freak.

*The cat is no longer a cat, but instead a nearly perfect replica of @Alex Metzger (aside from a hastily slicked back hairstyle and two distinctive double lightning bolt scars.)*

no can do, buddy. gotta be skin to skin contact.

 

You can borrow my form.

 

i dont WANT your form. being told to change into people makes me significantly less likely to do it.

 

Alright, but you're missing out on great hair and a 4-pack.

 

what are you? Some kind of daemon?

 

im ok with that because every body has a fucking awful flaw so the perks have to be phenomenal.

and being what, twelve, is a pretty fatal flaw.

 

Fourteen!!!

 

whoa, whoa, whoa, cool it on the insults, will you? im not a demon, im just a person...thing who can turn into other things.

ten.

 

Yeah, we call that a daemon back home. Someone with some kind of abnormal power. Not all daemons are bad though.

 

things i dont like being called: demon, freak, hallucination, alien, 'you really spiced things up in the bedroom, so when are you turning back?'

 

Understood. I will mark that in my memory.

 

"Hello!" she calls, seeing Zarya there. "Fancy meeting YOU here! This calls for a drink."

 

special shoutout to the one guy who called me a cryptid and started babbling about mothmans ass.