shitposting rave 4: (almost) anything goes

-she approaches again, more slowly to prevent coming off as aggressive, and sticks her head under one of his hands once she's close enough. If he doesn't pet her she'll pet herself-

 

"...We are not getting you a rabbit like that" He insisted firmly with a frown, "Especially not one to have around the kids-!"

 

After the initial surprise, he obliges, petting her. His eye glittered a little.

"Hey, he's an alright guy- I mean, not really, but he hasn't tried to hurt anyone I know so far!" Bill quickly added, insistent.

 

-purrs, kinda like a muffled motorcycle-

 

[Still muffled by fur]
Ringing endorsement. Very reassuring. Totally sounds like a guy I'd want around my kids. Definitely.

 

He continues to administer the pettings. He is at peace.

"Hey, he knows what'd happen if he did!" Bill's voice took on a dark undertone, the smile on his face for just a moment seeming a lot less friendly before both voice and expression resumed their generally friendly tone. "Don't think we've met yet, so hello! Or... if we have, I've forgotten! Whoops!"

 

"I'd honestly just prefer not to risk it..." He also insisted-or rather almost seemed to plead with Bill about the issue.

 

"If you don't want to, I'll respect that- But we'll have to find somewhere else to play cards now." He added on jokingly, seeming to understand. He hadn't let the being near his children before as it were, but if Ford was concerned he'd listen to his wishes.

 

Think I've seen you around a time or two but that was during the whole pool-dyeing... thing. [He frees a hand to wave vaguely at the red spring.] Venture of Lower Petrohex at your service as long as service doesn't involve leaving here or murder.

 

"Name's Bill, er... Wilhelm. I usually go by Bill but people seem to prefer my full name around here, nice to meet ya!" He pauses briefly to stare at the dyed pool before looking back over at Venture. "Call me whatever's convenient for you!"

 

"Are you another Bill from a different dimension?" Jame asks. "Clearly from a nicer dimension than ours is."

 

"Sure am!" He turns his attention to Jame. "I'm from over in Dimension S-411- nicer is relative, though! Every place has its ups and downs."

 

"I haven't felt the urge to stab you, so you're already doing better than the other one! How come you're more human-like than he?"

 

you can't just ask people why they're human-like, jame!

 

"Why ever not? People say things like that to me. 'I didn't realize you looked so human' and the like."

 

"Holy shit, you're adorable." Valiska laughs.

 

"I'd very much appreciate that if you DID stab me, you'd do so in a non-lethal area, thanks!" He lets out a laugh before continuing. "A couple reasons, one being I like having my eye and my mouth in separate orifices! Another's that it makes it a lot easier to go out into public areas without too much trouble! For some reason, nobody ever notices the glowing."

 

"Other one got it in the eye. You don't need stabbed, though, so don't worry about that. And people really don't look, do they? This is how thieves get away with theft. At least the smart ones."

 

memes

 

stop trying to make memes happen orb

theyre not gonna happen