shitposting rave 5: discount rejects from every genre

(:B

 

Ford grins. The Condesce has a replacement. It really will be the best Pines fireworks show ever.

 

vwhy do i doubt that a male lowvblood is somehowv the newv empress.

 

"Because you're a bigot?" Ford shrugs.

 

i dont think you understand howv the role of empress is passed on.

 

Lissa curls up against Ford's side and gets comfortable, then begins to very loudly purr. The ear scritches she's getting are wonderful.

 

"I suspect in this case that it wasn't the usual manner."

 

THERE'S FOUR OF US. I SAID THIS BEFORE, WHY THE FUCK DOES NO ONE LISTEN TO ME FOR MORE THAN FIVE SECONDS?! ME AND TEREZI AND JADE AND DAVE.

NONE OF US IS THE ~EMPRESS~ AND I DON'T THINK WE REPLACED HER SO MUCH AS VIOLENTLY REMOVED FROM THE THRONE AND THEN LET A NEW SOCIETY FORM NATURALLY. GIVEN WE WERE QUITE LITERALLY THE LAST SEEDS OF TROLLKIND.

 

do you not understand howv empresses get replaced??

 

AS YOU HAVE POINTED OUT, I AM NEITHER TYRIAN NOR FEMALE

 

you dont havwe to be if you cheated, vwhich you apparently did.

 

"Do you not understand the concept of regime change?"

 

UH YEAH, OBVIOUSLY? WHEN THE LAST MEMBER OF YOUR SPECIES WHO GIVES A FUCK DIES YOU GET TO MAKE YOUR OWN RULES. SHOCKING.

 

do you not understand the concept of butting the fuck out of a species-exclusivwe convwersation.

 

first you bastardize our romance and nowv this. vwhats vwrong vwith sticking to your owvn goddamn culture, huh.

 

-the beast has returned. this time trotting alongside a jedi happily.-

 

-said jedi is tori who seems to have no reaction to jorin beyond occasionally being frustrated when the strill decides to play with his robes while he's walking-

 

"Not when I have to deal with the bitch, unsurprisingly." Ford grins. "Face it. She can be taken out. It's not impossible. It never is. No empire lasts forever. But it's very helpful that they always think they will."

 

"Cultural appropriation. It's what's for dinner."

 

OH, CHRIST, MY SNIFFNODE ISN'T PREPARED FOR A SECOND WAVE. IT'S BARELY RECOVERED FROM THE CASUALTIES FROM *LAST* TIME! WHAT DID I DO TO DESERVE THIS BRUTAL GAS BOMB.

I HAVE ME A SIP OF THAT THERE ~HUMAN ROMANCE~ AND GET MY SLIMY FRONDS ALL OVER IT IN THE PROCESS. IT IS A BEAUTIFUL SHARING MOMENT AND WE ARE ALL THE HAPPIER FOR DOING WHATEVER THE FUCK WE WANT. MAGICAL!