shitposting rave 5: discount rejects from every genre

Oh... MY GOD.

 

Oh my!

 

ASLEEP OR NOT, BUBBLE OR NOT, GLITTER AND CONFETTI ARE LITTLE ANGEL TURDS OF MISERY THAT FLOAT THROUGH THE AIR IN WAIT OF AN OPPORTUNITY TO GLUE THEMSELVES TO YOUR BODY.

MY CONDOLENCES FOR THAT, TOO. ENJOYING THE COMPANY OF DOUCHEBAGS MEANS ACTUAL NICE PEOPLE WILL BE DRIVEN OFF BY YOUR "ASS AURA" IF YOU WILL.

DEFINE "LEGAL TO DRINK." I'M AN ADULT, FOR ONE, SO FUCK YOU VERY MUCH. BESIDES, ALCOHOL JUST MAKES PEOPLE FUNNIER AND LESS ANNOYING, USUALLY. I'M PERFECTLY CAPABLE OF DECIDING FOR MYSELF IF I WANT TO BE FUNNIER AND LESS ANNOYING.

OKAY, WHAT THE FUCK, WHY NOT. I WILL PROVIDE A EULOGY FOR QUILLBEASTS AT YOUR IMPROMPTU WEDDING, AND THEN KICK YOU DOWN THE AISLE FOR SHITS AND GIGGLES. WHAT A THRILLING GESTURE! I'M SURE YOUR HYPOTHETICAL FIANCE WILL OVERCOME WITH JOY AND AFFECTION.

 

Oh yours!

[She's grinning.]

 

-Can robots blush? Archive certainly gives the impression of blushing, even if her cheeks don't actually color.-

Oh, you!

 

YOU'VE MADE ME SO HAPPY, I CAN DIE FREE OF REGRETS NOW!
^_^

 

Oh, me!

[She scales LORGE WIFE to give her a smacking kiss on the cheek.]

 

I'm kind of an ass, no joke. I got a lot of friends though.

*Beaming award winning smile*

 

-She swings Index up in the air and then catches her in a hug.-

I don't even know what you're teasing me about.

 

@WRENCH callout

Spoiler: Big Image

 

I don't either! You're just so cute I can't stop teasing you about everything!

[She laughs and peppers kisses all over LORGE WIFE.]

 

I'M SO THRILLED I COULD JUST SHIT DIAMONDS.

[ |:B face]

OH, I'M SURE! I HAVE A VERITABLE ARMY OF FRIENDS. BUT THEY'RE ALL ALMOST AS REPREHENSIBLE IN THE PERSONALITY DEPARTMENT AS I AM, FUNNY HOW THAT WORKS.

 

-Archive whispers something extremely dirty into Index's ear.-

 

Aw, well, I guess that's true.

 

Spoiler: gif

 

[Giggle shriek of delight, followed by Index pressing her hands to her cheeks.]

 

C'mon, let's wake up, eh?

 

*Snickers like an asshole*

 

Ford cracks up. "If it wasn't meant to be an erogenous zone there wouldn't be all of those nerve endings there."

 

"...were there people here who didn't know that yet?"

Lissa shrugs.

"...are there even people here to whom that wouldn't actually apply?"