shitposting rave 5: discount rejects from every genre

That´s not what I meant but I´ll try it? And I did Not! -nibbles honeycomb. It gets stuck all over him, honey dripping down from his mandibles. He tries to lick it up-

Sorry?

Yes What he said!

No, My name is Sprocket!

That´s very young.

-groom bugfriend!- Swarm is important. Need someone to be home.

-chittering that translates as scandalized giggles- Thunderwing!!!

 

-He is still covered in honey and unsuccessfully trying to get it off his face-

 

Spoiler

GET-A-LOAD-OF-THIS-GUY-CAM: THE THRILLING SEQUEL!

 

[SQUEEEEEEEEEEE]
It will be our little seeeeeecreeeeeeeeeet~

[winks and blows him a kiss. Somehow. Despite the full-face-and-head-mask. Don't question it.]

 

... No. Nope.

 

I have no idea what that means, but I feel like it was an insult.

[He snorts.] Thanks, Deadpool! I don't think I'd hear the end of it if that slipped.

 

awwwww :c

[He exaggeratedly mimes zipping his li- nope he's throwing a tantrum instead] FFFFFUCK X-MEN ORIGINS AND FUCK THE HORSE IT RODE IN ON!
THE THINGS! THEY DID TO ME!
I liked that gesture too :c

 

Also don't touch me. I'm Josh, you're a lot like Wrench. He can be annoying but he's smart, do you like robotics? Guns? Explosives?

 

IT ABSOLUTELY WAS! MAYBE YOU AREN'T AS STUPID AS YOU LOOK

 

Who is this wrench? I get this tingly feeling, my "spidey-sense" so to speak, that says he is a handsome beast and incredibly funny.
Yes to guns and explosives kinda EHHHH on the robotics part, kiddo I have a BUSY schedule so I don't REALLY have time for learning anything more sophisticated than POINT AND BOOM. I'm a simple man. Of simple tastes.

 

What's an X-Men?

Of course I'm not stupid! I'll have you know I'm detective-in-training under the best of the best!

 

A member of DedSec, he wears a mask all the time.
*waves a hand to make an image of Wrench appear*

... That worked. I like that. He helped me build a drone big enough to lift a person, he also does a lot of weapon stuff with the 3D printer. Also explosives. He likes explosives. He's loud. Crude. Just showed up one day, he's very important. Sitara picks on him but I know she loves him.

 

Um. Mostly learn, still? Learn and fight, when I have to. I'm not good for stealth, so unless someone messes up...

...oh, and eat! Lots of scavenging and eating, that's important.

Yes? It is a language!! My first, even!!!

Well he is.

 

I never met him. -groom face, trying to get honey off- This stuff is good but very sticky.

 

[breathes in deeply]
It aaaaaall began when a bald guy in a wheel chair realized that people other than him had freaky superhuman mutant powers so he-
Yknow. Yknow what? I'm SO not the exposition guy let's just.
HEY! HEY EXPOSITION GUY! ROLL THE THE DAMN CLIP!

... God fuck the 2000s. That was just. Just awful. Ugh.
Moooooving on.

Spidey-sense 1, Logic Zer-oooooohhhhh.
hey you don't coincidentally knwo where one may meet this handsome guy? Does he like ice cream? getting shot in the foot? Flowers? Ice cream? Fuck I already said that.

That's a man- bug? mech? AFTER MY OWN HEART!

 

AND I'M THE EMPRESS

 

There are two that show up here. My Wrench and a vampire one? My Wrench was awake before I napped. He will probably be here later? April 1st was his birthday. He does like ice cream, but he looks silly eating it.

 

That's sick, dude! Though I doubt I could learn to speak it. We don't have the same anatomy as bugs, haha. It would be really awesome though!!

Ooooh, that's so cool. So, they're like the Flash? Except... they're born that way? Man, that'd be so sweet.

You don't look much like royalty to me.

 

:O
GEE YOUR MOM LET'S YOU HAVE TWO HOTTIES?
AND ONE OF THEM IS A FREAKING VAMPIRE?
[It is time for a silly little victory dance. Pool, you haven't even scored with them yet calm down.]
DON'T TELL ME WHAT TO DO NARRATOR!
[... okay.]

 

It is pretty sweet aside from the systematic oppression, some of them accidentally fucking up people's lives, their own lives, the laws of physics and the fabric of reality- But all in all a pretty sweet deal!