shitposting rave 5: discount rejects from every genre

Functional, non-corrupt and ethical governments are a myth.
(Since when has Apostasia been sitting there? She's got a datapad and something that suspiciously looks like it might be moonshine in her hands.)

 

Aw shit girl, you're from a Trump timeline? D: D: D:

 

[He´s so small and soft!]

 

<He is!!! We will keep him the safest.>

 

"You're not a ditz," Ford says gently, scritching her ears. "You are also not a slut in the pejorative sense of the word, and I obviously like your promiscuity as I've encouraged it with all my heart."

 

"Trump and the fucking Condesce. If America gets worse than this I'm not sure I want to know."

 

That's where she ended up? We've been wondering...

 

He never went into politics for us, just made a lot of noise about it. There was no big blow to rights. Just. Quiet erosion. And now shit's fucked and people don't even know.

 

"So I've always believed, but I do wish my partners had not had to die from it." Ford kisses Lissa on the top of her head, right between her ears. "I know I don't deserve to have you and the two of them at the same time, but it would have been nice."

 

Lissa snuggles him hard. "You do," she says, "and I'm sorry you don't have all of us."

"Well I'm not sure that's better, exactly. Although no Condesce is better, since she not-so-secretly wants to genocide all of us and the fucker thinks they're friends."

 

My condolences. I... know the feeling.
Scelus is not perfect, even if Kynvakyrei, I, and eight thousand generations of Judges have incessantly worked on making it better.

 

...So, Tuesday.

 

"Yes. You're one of our counterparts' girls?" Lissa smiles.

"Well, Ford and I have a plan now that our daughter's gone AWOL. She was using her as a hostage. See, if they helmed Jezebel, they could pilot that ship through dimensions. We obviously objected to this."

 

"I am sorry you know it." Ford smiles at her, sadly.

 

No genocidal aliens for us yet. Just humans deciding some humans aren't people enough.

 

(Oneira nods)
Oneira Eluvei e Courinna, greenblood caste, symbol Canes Venatici. You look a lot like Ma'Vali, but there's enough differences to tell. I hope your daughter finds her way back to you safe and sound.

The Tuesday comment was in regards to 'that fucker' thinking he's friends with the Condesce. It's sort of classic.

 

You'd think it would stop hurting after half a million years, but...
(Apostasia shakes her head) I am not drunk enough to go down that particular memory lane. That being said, can I offer you some of my moonshine?

(Apostasia winces) Sucks you guys have to deal with that sort of scrap as well. Best of luck in getting that sorted out, and if not, you can try and make your way to Scelus.

 

...where's Scelus and why do only people with engex ever mention it?

 

(Apostasia slides over a dataslate with a set of coordinates. It's a bit far out from anything and the frontlines of the war especially, behind a stretch of space that is pretty empty on most maps.) Around Sol-x367-y458-z780.
Because we're perpetually drunk, or would otherwise not be able to stand the utter stupidity of everyone else without bashing our heads in on the nearest wall.
(Apostasia grins)
Mostly kidding. Who else didya talk to that mentioned Scelus?

 

[Take the slate. Stream will be able to read it, probably. Thunderwing doesn't seem to realize he can't take things out of the rave.]
Flier? Forget his name. Standard flier, jet maybe? Velocitronian, eats light, very reflective. Round helm. Tried to trade me Scelan engex for something I was already eating. [This last bit is said like it's the worst offense possible.]