Out of context quotes thread

@TwoBrokenMirrors :
spinal cord develops a pac-man-esque head on the head
end

@IvyLB :
autovoreing spinal cord disease

 

"Know, thou Wretch, that the Synod of The First Church of Jesus Christ Militant has duly resolved and commanded and commended that Wikipedia must be and shalt be Cleansed and Purified and be made a Ready and Fitting Vehicle for the True Word of God."

there's...a lot more, and it provides exactly 0 context

 

@Wingyl right up until Wikipedia I assumed this was Monty Python.

 

nope this is a message that I genuinely, actually received on my Wikipedia talk page

 

there's so much more

ETA: warning: fundie is apparently unaware of line breaks

Spoiler: post 1

"I am a faithful, zealous, righteous and upright Christian soldier, committed to fight for MY Faith with no hesitations and no qualms, and give No Quarter to all Enemies of Christ - be they Infidel, Backslider, Heretic, Papist or Atheist - as all these are but different face of the same ANCIENT FOE, all alike but bestial minions of Satan and the Antichrist, all alike enemies which the True Christian Knight is duty bound to fight and extirpate. So be it, so be it, Amen in the Highest! So Hast God Ordained At The Very Creation Of The World, and So Verily Shalt It Be! The Thrice-Cursed Witch and Minion of Satan and of the Anti-Christ Nicole calling herself "MereTechnicality" is a Prime Example of such Cursed Enemies of the Christian Faith and the True Christian Church. Along with All Other Minions of Satan, she shalt be EXTIRPATED! Begone, ye Creature of Darkenss, ere the Light of the Risen Jesus Christ Militant strike Ye like Unto Seventy-Seven Suns! Amen, Amen, Amen in the Highest - God's Will Be Done!A Humble Foot Soldier in Archangel Michael's Army (talk) 11:14, 18 February 2017 (UTC)[[User:A Humble Foot Soldier in Archangel Michael's Army|A Humble Foot Soldier in Archangel Michael's Army]] ([[User talk:A Humble Foot Soldier in Archangel Michael's Army|talk]]) 11:18, 18 February 2017 (UTC)"

Spoiler: post 2

Foul Fiend, though stands Unmasked and revealed as the Satanic Minion thou art! Yea Indeed! Being enmeshed the Coils and Most Nefarious Designs of thy Infernal Master, thou hast Transgressed, Blasphemed and Presumed to block the True Word of God in Wikipedia! For such an Enormity of Mortal Sin there is not – and cannot be – any Forgiveness! Know, thou Wretch, thou Foul Fiend, thou Satanic Minion, that the True Word of God issues and emanates from The Most Holy Person Now Living, none less than The Most Holy Reverend Ebenezer Abel Lux, Consecrated Pastor and Prophetic Leader of the First Church of Jesus Christ Militant, to whom were vouchsafed Divine Visions and Angelic Visitations and who is Fated and Destined to Stand at the Right Hand of Christ in the Second Coming. Know, thou Wretch, that the Synod of The First Church of Jesus Christ Militant has duly resolved and commanded and commended that Wikipedia must be and shalt be Cleansed and Purified and be made a Ready and Fitting Vehicle for the True Word of God. Know, thou Wretch, that I, Thomas Lucas McGregor III, am a faithful, zealous, righteous and upright Christian soldier, a True, Faithful and Loyal Son and Knight of the Church, and that I most willingly and happily do the bidding of the Synod and of the Most Holy Reverend Lux – so help me God Almighty and the Risen Jesus Christ Militant. Thereupon I, Thomas Lucas McGregor III, Soldier of Christ, hereby challenge thou, Fould Fiend and Minion of Satan, to single combat! Yea, to to single combat! Choose your Arms and Come to Me on the Field of Tournament! You may prepare all thy Infernal Devices, you may beseech the aid of Succor of thy Foul Infernal Master – but it would avail thee Naught. For it is God Almighty who Guides my sword arm, and it Jesus’ Bright Sword of Justice which I Bear. To the Righteous shalt Victory go, yea indeed, most assuredly! I shalt meet thou on the Field of Testing and I shalt mete out to thee thy Just Deserts. Thy Earthly Husk shalt go to a miserable shameful burial in Unhallowed Ground, and thy Doomed Immortal Soul shalt go down to Total Perdition and a million million years of unceasing Hellish Torture – as thou so very richly Deserve. So be it, so be it, Amen in the Highest! So Hast God Ordained At The Very Creation Of The World, and So Verily Shalt It Be! Amen, Amen, Amen! [[User:A Wayfarer Bearing the Sword of Jesus|A Wayfarer Bearing the Sword of Jesus]] ([[User talk:A Wayfarer Bearing the Sword of Jesus|talk]]) 15:44, 22 April 2017 (UTC)

 

next copypasta.

 

I'm on some group's shit list now but I don't care because these are hilarious

 

... what is that person even on
isnt there legislation against most mind-altering substances

 

this is your brain on fundamentalism

 

I wanted to add something witty to this, but it's almost 2 am so I'll only link the post that I immediately thought of.

 

I am thoroughly confused by that post

 

Basically a collection of 2013 tumblr memes. Mildly insane. My brain associated the "This is your brain on fundamentalism" with the passage about the MRI.

 

ah
also this

 

@cryptoThelematrix

 

"I will throw myself on the grenade of toasterlessness!"

 

Spoiler: context

YOI Badfic Friend found a masterpiece.

Yes, that was meant to be romantic.