shitposting rave 5: discount rejects from every genre

It's common? How'd that happen?

 

I have no idea. Geology isn't my strong suit at all. [Wrong kinda scientists here for that]

 

[dave has summoned a fork and is already chowing down by the time she says that last part; he looks up with a mouthful of delicious, delicious potato shavings]

no this is good
this is fucking great actually jesus fried christ
a little potato angel flew down from tuber heaven and waved her idk magic wand cause potato angels are pretty much fairies anyway
and blessed this pan to contain gods gift to spudkind

how do you keep them from turning into charcoal cause thats usually my problem

 

But energon isn't found naturally on planets other than Cybertron, I thought?

 

I'm the prettiest we've all agreed ;) But they are a lovely complement even if me and Curls never match to save our lives he's more into cool tones and I'm all reds all the time! Ooh ooh ooh he did do a sunrise swatch once here look-- [what do you mean he's interrupting the nerdery? Venture appearifies a dataslate with a picture of a slim-lined stealth jet done up in pinks and oranges; gold filigree glitters on his wings in stylized feather patterns. The jet himself is laughing at something off-camera, one hand badly hiding his smile.]

Oh hey I know this one-- because Nova did a lot of expansionist stuff before leaving on the Ark but most of the colonies and outposts he started died out so there's still energon seeded on those planets but not a lot of mechanoid life there!

 

Oh, that makes sense! So it's just not found naturally, depending on how you're defining naturally, but has been there so long it's a definite part of the ecosystem.

 

Ah, the other problem. Stop when they turn that nice underside-of-a-cookie color and the edges start going blackish. Also make sure whatever you coat the pan with you do it thoroughly. Shit sticking to your pan will thoroughly burn your shit.

 

[Snap-to-fingerguns expert maneuver!] Got it in one! All those boring history lessons turned out good for something in the end apparently

 

- you come over here where i can´t get you!

 

Who's Nova, though?

 

so like pam isnt actually a ripoff to see what people will shell out hard earned cash for then
like
it smells bad but you put it on food im pretty sure its safe so shut up and give me $5
ceos pimping out useless products left and right while starving johns come up and buy a banana slicer
or i guess maybe paula deen was more right about butter amounts than i ever anticipated
im having a fucking epiphany

[dave would stick a taco in a blender with salsa from a jar, set to puree, and call the resulting taco soup high quality cuisine. the things he is learning this day]

 

I like vegetable oil. Multi-purpose.

-yes that is a straight face. No eyebrows here, no sir. Is she making a rude joke? Yes and also no. itsatrap.midi-

 

"So he left the Autobots for the same reason you left the Decepticons?" ShockCollar asks. "What do you two even do?"

 

you know i love me a versatile tool
carry one with me at all times just in case

[dave makes the eyebrows back, although the effect is probably somewhat lessened by him finishing off the potates]

 

Awwww but nurse! I'm having an intercultural exchange! [Pout!]

Nova Prime may he return quickly and may we be found worth-- oh wait wrong not-deity. May he rest in fragging pieces. First Prime we have actual physical evidence of the existence of but blah blah apotheosis something something the Thirteen totally existed and he was literally blessed by one of them yeah right. [Venture rolls his eyes.] Reigned for something like three million years known in the later millennia before the civil war as the "Golden Age" did a bunch of science and slag and ran around expanding the empire For The Greater Good and-- oh yeah-- was responsible for the first cold-con runs and declaring us inherently lower-class. He fragged off on a ship called the Ark around 960 and... vanished after poking a spacetime anomaly near as anyone can tell. If the history texts aren't part of a coverup.

 

He sounds like an aft.

 

I wouldn't knoooow I'm a Sentinel-era mech :P He was all about the glorification of the Empire Nova was like his role model or some slag. Except Sentinel went and made everything like ten times worse but shhhh

 

So what's your culinary specialty? I accept drinks too.

 

This is why I think there shouldn't be primes anymore.

 

i mean
i LIKE apple juice but i cant make it
never squeezed an apple till it cried mercy and gave up the goods
my cookings a little uh
unique
sure youre ready to handle the culinary samplings of dave strider