why is 'ridiculous' always spelt "rediculous" in this thing when karkat says it? does he have an accent? or does the author simply not know how to spell 'ridiculous'?
I'm not entirely sure that when a guy is trying to kill you your first assessment of him would be the kissibility of his lips
The fact that someone's done a serious retelling of Sweet Bro and Hella Jeff which gives it some sort of continuity but nobody's done one for the similarly random Axe Cop. I want one, darn it!
YOI Badfic Friend just quoted this at me: How. How do you write something that so blatantly contradicts itself into nonsensicality and not realize it.
Oooh, apparently in that fic I just quoted, somebody is taken in off the street, is in the house all day, and the next day has suddenly developed heatstroke from being out on the street, and has an extended fever from it. Gotta love when writers don't even do the most cursory of Googling. :::')))
Spoiler: Nsfw adjacent “You’re in no position to tell me what to do, and good, you shouldn’t trust me. As you said, I’m a daemon.” The human looking daemon then reached out and pressed his hand against Gladiolus’ chest, letting his fingers hover for a few seconds before he dug his claws into his flesh causing the shield to grunt in surprise at the sudden feeling of pain. The blond watched the thin line of blood seep out of the shield’s flesh on his chest and slowly run down his chest, but before it got too far the daemon leaned in and pressed his tongue against the thin line of blood, running his tongue up and over the small wound he made on the dark haired brunette, licking up the blood. The man jumped and let out a small curse his entire body spasming causing the blond the grin. “Didn’t you know, daemons have one of the warmest tongues in the wide spread of creatures that roam these lands? The smallest of licks on a human body can either be very painful or very pleasureable, depending on the daemon’s nature. Daemon’s saliva is also either very venomous or it can heal wounds, again, depending on the nature of the daemon.” He then pulled away from the Shield, his glowing eyes narrowing as he continued to grin. “So tell us big guy, how did it feel?” He cooed. Gladiolus made a small sound, the heat of the lick continuing to travel through his body, causing his mind to cloud over slightly before he shook his head and blinked rapidly, looking up and glaring at the blond. “Fuck off, what the hell are you? A pervert who gets off by screwing around with their prisoners?” He snarled. This particular daemon is sentient but I'm 99% sure thats a pretty rare state of things
Smut gripe: Het sex scenes with no/minimal foreplay. Like, it's hard enough for me to find a het ship I actually want to read about gettin' busy, and then when it's all wham-bam-thank-you-ma'am? MEDIOCRE. (Obviously if the characters are just having a quickie, that's different—I mean the fics where it's supposed to be, y'know, proper sexytimes and is instead just…kiss kiss in-out let's have a cig the money's on the dresser.)
Me: *makes fun of epithet abuse* Also me: *has 9.5k of WIP where the POV character stubbornly refuses to think of 75% of the people he interacts with by name* Me: "...Okay, but I know what I'm doing, dammit."
I mean, yeah. Epithets aren't bad cause they exist, they're bad if you don't use them proper. If your POV character stubbornly dehumanizes people, then that's a character trait, not, like. Shitty writing. Like, Kylo Ren pretty firmly refuses to address people by name, unless you're Han Solo, which seems more like an attempt to say "hey no, not my Dad" than actually acknowledging his personhood. If you were to write a fic from his POV, i'd be pretty taken aback if everyone weren't an epithet. yunno, for an example.
Well, in this case it's "paranoid abused ten-year-old who assumes the only reason strange adults could possibly be trying to act friendly to him is to lull him into a false sense of security and nothing they say can be trusted," but yes. :::PPP
Handy uses them because we have no reason to remember anyone's name. Easier just to deumanize everyone too. What's the point. You have a hat. You are Hat Man. now you are dead well fuck
"Mistaken identity" is a great thing to play with when one of your characters has a mask and never reveals his face... except that he's also got very distinctive tattoos and wears things that show them off 24/7, so if you're going to play the 'he lost his mask and now NO ONE KNOWS WHO HE IIIIIIIS' card you have to come up with some really good reasons for why no one bothered to look at his hands. This fic did not come up with those reasons. (Also the premise in general was Bad, but this especially irked me.)
Fic advertised as graphic violence, H/C, plenty of good shit, pairing and main character focus I like, I'm like yeah okay let's do this. Get immediately yanked out of the mood because the whump target character is not just assaulted but tortured (hands and tongue cut off, words carved into his skin) for just being mouthy - as is his character - and the only people around to do it would be part of his friend/acquaintance group of which that sort of reaction to his usual behavior would be so far completely out of character for any of them, even the more violence prone ones, that the only god damned explanation I would be willing to buy is possession by an outside force. Which is not where the author went with that at all. Seriously, they could have kept the exact same characters and story and just put it in a different setting where there were people around outside of the friend group for an available pool of suspects and it would have worked fine. I would have been all on board that shit.
Another gripe from a friend ages ago: "Just found a broken link to Cloud Mows The Lawn. My instinct to fix broken links is now at war with my instinct not to link anyone to Cloud Mows The Lawn." Someone else's suggestion was "Fix the link by removing it entirely."
