shitposting rave 5: discount rejects from every genre

h4h4, th1s POS3R do3snt 3v3n know wh4t 4 b3p1s 1s for!!!!!!!

 

... beeping?

 

noooooop3! >8)

 

... booping?

 

[flatly:] FRANKLY I'M OFFENDED THAT YOU PROFESS TO KNOW MEMBERS OF MY SPECIES AND AREN'T AWARE OF THE ALL-IMPORTANT BEPIS. YOU HOOFBEAST'S ASS

 

*frowns* ... is it how they do pregnancy if the mother grub's not around? I can see Sunshine not wanting to mention something like that...

 

1 m34n, sh1t, m4n! 1 dont 3v3n know 1f 1 should b3 t3ll1ng you th1s.

w3v3 got 4 c3r3mony on b3forus for th3 m1nut3 4n 4l13n f1gur3z out wh4t th3 b3p1s do3s 4nd 1t 1s som3 M4D sn4zzy sh1t. dont w4nn4 ru1n your sp3sh mom3nt!!!!!!!!

 

... a ceremony? I guess that means the bepis is pretty important to you guys, yeah?

 

th3r3z thr33 s3p4r4t3 cultz d3d1c4t3d to th3 t1p of th3 b3p1s 4lon3!!!!!

 

ive carefully considered my options and upon evaulating the amount of people whod see me grabbing my dick like its the last flatscreen on black friday
hard pass

dude

 

... wow.

 

Your boyfriend sounded pretty offended that I didn't know about it. And apparently it's a big thing on Beforus, so... maybe there is an actual bepis... I dunno and maybe Sunshine didn't trust me enough to tell me about it...

 

(shhhhhhh!!!!!!!!!!)

*Ofc, she is absurdly loud in all areas including shushing, so this probably just draws more attention to it.*

 

IN WHAT UNIVERSE DO YOU THINK WE'D HAVE ANYTHING EVEN REMOTELY RESEMBLING PREGNANCY IN OUR PERFECT, HIGHLY EVOLVED RACE? WE WOULDN'T, AND FUCK YOU FOR IMPLYING SO.

NO, THE BEPIS IS MUCH MORE SACRED THAN *THAT.* I'M BREAKING LIKE, SIX LAWS JUST BY MENTIONING IT BY NAME TO AN OUTSIDER. CONSIDER YOURSELF LUCKY I'M WILLING TO TAKE SUCH A RISK

 

*sighs* ... sorry...

 

b4rr1ng som3 R34LLLLL grody nook 1nf3ct1onz!

 

DUDE.

 

... yeah?

 

my boyfriend has a name and if karkat was actually for real pissed youd get at least five hundred more words explaining in exactly which festering orifice you could shove your putrid opinions
no man hes just fucking wi--

--consider me silenced

[he holds up his hands. latula is very intense and he has been cowed]

 

*She's 5'1 in heels and 50% extremely pointy pearly whites. Terrifying.*