shitposting rave 5: discount rejects from every genre

Huh. I dunno honestly. Listening to some sloppy medic's files as they pass through isn't exactly a substitute for training.

[He immediately wraps his arms around her, propping his chin up on her shoulder, despite the little wobbly grimace he makes at her words he doesn't pull away.] Let's not advertise my already very obvious weakspots, sweetspark, I don't think I can handle more emotions today.

 

I mean, fair. Just kinda theorizing over here because... [Shrug!] Because medics, I guess.

[Quick, shove more rust in your face so you don't grin at the adorable couple. They are so cute and it's still nice to know Scanner has people looking out for him.]

 

No advertising. -she reaches up and pats his cheek- Just saying.

-she turns her head slightly to eye him, then gives him a flicker of a smile and a slight nod-

 

The tiny medic-... the sparkmonitor medic I guess, he doesn't really but then he'd probably crumple like tinfoil if he had to think too hard about how to hurt anyone in a way he couldn't immediately fix.

[He smiles like an idiot]
Ah yeah. And as always you're right, just to top it off.

 

Sparkmonitor... Half Life? Heh, we are both pretty tiny, aren't we. I meant more 'I have the information to theorize because I've got the training,' but yeah, ain't like I'm looking to hurt anybody.

 

Don't even suggest it to the medic.
And I will make sure you never run into said situation.

 

Sometimes havin' a hard time guessing what people mean by job or position names as categories. Seperating what someone does and what training they have and who they are... S'hard. And b'sides, predicting slag's pretty reliable if you just consider stuff like "tanks usually go here, medics usually go there, haulers and couriers run around along these routes" and so on. Didn't usually care to get to know mechs beyond general positions outside of some exceptions. Still kinda new.

Thanks.
[He kisses her cheek, pulling her closer briefly.]

 

Ah, fair. Only name you really needa know is Throttle's anyway, hey? [Crunching on a rustball does jack all to hide a grin that big, Wires.]

 

Hey now, watch it, gramps.
[He's grinning too though.]

 

What, should I give you a whole name of one'a mine in return? [Wires snickers. His official conjunx endura is still a matter of public record, it's not that hard to find out.]

 

No thanks, I like you, but I don't like you enough to want to know what your mouth does when you're with them.
[Scanner no, that's rood]

 

[Not rude enough to bother someone who grew up in a mining city. Wires just laughs.] Fair enough! We all know Throttle'd get me if I tried anything anyway.

 

That she would.
[He smiles dorkily, just for a moment.]

 

-a tired enters the rave. They look like they haven't slept in approximately ever- the dark circles don't show much on their skin but it makes the tired stare stick out more. They could also use a sandwich or twenty. There's sand and oil on their clothes, in their hair, and under their nails-

...fuck. -their voice has the distinct harshness of someone who's spent a lot of time yelling at idiots-

 

[oh, so similar hat]

WELL, YOU'RE DEFINITELY WITH THE RIGHT CROWD? HI

 

-they sloooowly drag their hands down their face- If Chung dosed my grog I'm going to murder him. I suppose Silvershade can run things for a while- he at least doesn't need a map to find his ass. Do hivers even have asses?

You're odd for a Shek. Short. And I've never seen orange spikes on them. I'm Ren, of Ren's Den.

 

I'M SURE AT LEAST 75% OF THAT WAS REAL WORDS. WHAT IN THE NAME OF SWEATY HUMAN CHRIST'S GREASY BURIAL SHROUD IS A SHEK??

I'M KARKAT, OF ALTERNIA I GUESS, IF THAT'S HOW WE'RE DOING INTRODUCTIONS. ALSO: NOT A SHEK. I'M A TROLL, NOT EVEN THE SHORTEST ONE HERE, AND THOSE CHARMING ORANGE SPIKES ARE MY HORNS THANK YOU VERY MUCH.

 

Shek are grey people from the Stenn desert. Tall and spikey. They have bone plates on their body that spikes grow out of. Usually have a few on their head. Some have really short ones that don't show though, like Ruka's. She's kind of tetchy about it. They're a military people. Believe the only way to get into their Holy Lands is to die fighting a worthy enemy. -they sound thoroughly unimpressed-

I've never heard of Alternia. But most haven't heard of the Den. We prefer it that way.

 

WELL, OK, I CAN UNDERSTAND BEING ~TETCHY~ ABOUT SOMETHING LIKE THAT. HORNS OR SPIKES OR WHATEVER CUT A PRETTY DRAMATIC SILHOUETTE AND BIOLOGY JUST LOOKS AT YOU AND GOES "NO, FUCK YOU IN PARTICULAR."

TROLLS WERE PRETTY FUCKING MILITARY, TOO, BUT OUR RELIGIONS BEGAN AND ENDED AT CULTS, FOR THE MOST PART. WHICH ARE PRETTY FUCKING OVERRATED, IF YOU ASK ME

YOU PROBABLY HAVEN'T HEARD OF ALTERNIA BECAUSE IT WAS ONE, IN A DIFFERENT UNIVERSE THAN YOURS OR THE ONE I'M IN NOW. TWO, IT WAS A DIFFERENT PLANET ENTIRELY, AND LET'S NOT EVEN *BEGIN* TO TALK ABOUT HOW EXPANSIVE THE EMPIRE WAS. THREE, IF ANYTHING AT ALL IS LEFT OF IT, IT'S NOTHING MORE THAN A HANDFUL OF SPACE DUST NOW.

 

They do make for pretty wicked silhouette. Ruka makes up for it with her assortment of swords. No less than two at any time. Giant-ass one counts as two.

I'm not one for any religion, but I'll play up the Cult of Narko stuff to mess with the Okranites when I feel like it. Stop binding and do a little "Hail to the wicked daughters!" and watch the uptight tin-cans flip their shit, always good for a laugh. They pretty much think I'm the Night Lady incarnate. Just don't realize the flat trader's the same person, which just makes it more funny.

-yawwwwwns- Wish I could find the bread leak. That's been pissing me off for weeks.

Other universes and planets sounds like Old Empire shit. Dunno if they ever achieved it though. These days people are lucky if they can hold all of three strongholds. Weak-ass excuses for empires. Still enough to be a pain in my ass though.