shitposting rave 5: discount rejects from every genre

*Time to ANGRILY GNAW at his nasty wrist bandages since he is not allowed 2 holler.*

 

No I'm a paragon of scientific curiosity
[... it's the fun game of "Is Scanner sincere or is he just that good at fucking with people?" again!!!]

 

Youre Gonna Get Some Nasty Parasite From That You Know, Sir.

 

Grrd.

 

Do You Want Grubsauce With Your Bandages Sir?

 

"That's nothing to be proud of," Valiska snaps back. "I understand you're one of the parents of an entirely new universe. Learn better. Set a fucking example."

"Not much, but it's as close to an apology as I am likely to get, so I'll take it?" Valiska can't help smiling a little. "And yes, fuck Alternian court manners, or rather don't, because they don't deserve to be given the pleasure. But we're the house of the Courinna, now, and courinni are wary and fierce, but also gracious and kind, like your precious son."

"Screaming is for the kind of pain where you are not coherent enough to ask for help by using your words, young man." Valiska sighs. "I know about always being in pain. Most of my household knows about always being in pain. We try not to add to that."

Valiska smiles. "Well, clearly you know what I meant."

"Cut it out, you two. Why are you trying to implode this person, anyway, Chroma?"

 

Ford can't help laughing a little, and he figures he's allowed, since Valiska's doing the parenting in the heat of this particular moment.

 

-he's right. tannig is literally hearing static right now, and is starting to zone out.-

 

Last time I heard a mom use that tone of voice, it was my sister and a houseful of five year olds had just declared war on her plants. Does it work better when they get older?

 

Mostly Cuz Hes Easy To Annoy And If He Didnt Want Asshole Wigglers Trying To Annoy Him Into An Early Grave He Wouldnt Have Lead A Fucking Rebellion On Alternia. This Is How We Are, Trying To Piss Someone Off Is An Expression Of Deep Respect.

 

The guY was harassing Me. It wasn't exactlY a normal situation.

 

*GNAWS HARDER. You're not his REAL mom.*

 

*Spits out his wrist.*
I didn't lead a re6elli9n and I still d9n't kn9w why every9ne insists I did.

I simply suggested t9 a few rand9m pe9ple that may6e su6jugating half the planets' fucking p9pulati9n wasn't "just h9w it's always 6een".

 

Thats How You Lead A Rebellion, Dipshit.

 

I can confirm that actually.

 

N9 it isn't.

 

[karkat looks taken aback, and opens his mouth once or twice to say something before closing it again. he inhales deeply in an attempt to collect his thoughts and prevent another tantrum]

...OK, I AM GOING TO MAKE THE *MONUMENTAL* EFFORT NOT TO HAVE A CONNIPTION OVER THIS, BECAUSE POINT: TAKEN, BUT, LIKE.

I CAN'T JUST "LEARN BETTER"
I'M AN ADULT BUT I'M ONLY *NINE,* I DON'T HAVE EVERYTHING FIGURED OUT! I DON'T HAVE *ANYTHING* FIGURED OUT, ACTUALLY, AND I DON'T HAVE ANY ~ROLE MODELS~ BECAUSE I'M SUPPOSED TO BE SOME ALL-POWERFUL GOD AND INSTEAD I'M AN OBNOXIOUS WIGGLER WHO SCREAMS UNTIL HIS PROBLEMS GO AWAY.

I'M SORRY I FLIPPED OUT AND STARTED SHRIEKING LIKE I WAS GOING TO WIN AN AWARD FOR IT, OK? IT'S KIND OF MY DEFAULT STATE BUT I WILL MAKE AN EFFORT TO CONSIDER FOREIGN CONCEPTS SUCH AS "ACTUALLY COMMUNICATING WITH WORDS" THE NEXT TIME I HAVE TO SHIT MY PANTS AND ACT LIKE A HOWLER MONKEY

 

who4. th4ts pretty deep.

 

Apparently it does. Consider me informed.

 

=(] i hope you rea7ize that the person you are speaking to is the man there was a g7oba7 manhunt for some time ago.......and that what he is suggesting is comp7ete and utter heresy