shitposting rave 5: discount rejects from every genre

YES that would be the BEST

 

-She burrows into his tentacles.-

 

*Carefully folds his tentacles around her*

You're not afraid of me, right?

 

[Oh he'd be willing to teach. For free even, he owes Eda that much. He'd even be willing to sell the seeds! But teaching gets difficult without talking. And talking doesn't really happen anymore now that he moved away from The City. No need for it. Oak Tree Town is very understanding. But he's willing to try. The only thing he won't share are his secret ingredients for recipes. Those are for amassing comfortable wealth, because wealth is safety. And Safety means your favorite trees are safe and no one will take away your animal friends.]

 

Naw. You're a sweetie!

 

You'll never get him to leave you alone now, doll.

[He drapes himself across Req's back.]

 

Thank you! I don't WANT to hurt people.... always.

CUTIE FACE

*Grabs, no you're part of the pile now*

 

-considering... they look at the one they bit. No seeds. Ok yeah how the fuck to these grow- What kind of thing even is this? It doesn't have seeds on the inside, like greenfruit. And I can tell it's not a cactus. Those are the only two things that aren't made of seeds that we can really grow.

 

[When the picture comes out, they finally manage to approach; they blink perfectly in unison. Is that... some kind of beastformer? They look kind of organic, with such irregular markings... and how would anyone put a beastformer in a can, anyway? After another moment of scuffling-- they seem to be holding hands, not that it's stopping them from roughhousing-- the one with red optics speaks up.] How'd you get them in the can?

 

-a vent hisses-

 

[The twin not talking to a stranger waves at the nearest vent.] Hi, Kat!

 

[He does his best to explain by gestures. You have to let the root sit for a bit until it developes little green buds and then some, eventually you can plant those seedlings, which will grow a proper plant, that will have many more root-things-that-are-actually-edible when it is mature which you can dig up. "seeds" is rather misleading in truth but he does sell the "slips", the little baby plants budding from a sweet potato.]

[This, too, he tries to explain by way of gesturing (some of which is proper sign language even). It's not the cow in the can, but you milk the cow daily, because otherwise her udder will be painfully full. The milk is a gift even though both him and his cows benefit from this relationship he makes sure to always thank Hanako and Yuki for their hard work.]

 

I don't want to hurt people always, either. I wanna push Oar our the airlock, though!

 

Oar? A bot?

 

[These children have never seen a cow before in their life, much less enough to understand milking gestures. They do, however, understand not talking! One of them offers a dataslate tablet for typing on, should that be easier. Again, Aralia talks first:] Or do you know chiro? We can do chiro too! Or--

[Laeto:] I don't think they have comms, they look kind of organic?

[Aralia pouts.] We can still ask.

 

-a paw is poked out in response-

 

He's from Obrizon. He attacked me bc I'm mute!

 

[He shakes his head. Nope no whatever the heck those comms are. The tablet looks... weird. But typing he knows how to do even if no one in oak tree town has a computer. They're not needed there, not really. But yes. Typing. He types out a rather lengthy explanation of why cows give milk and why people keep cows to milk them, and also why Hanako and Yuki are the best cows and how much he loves them, intermittently pushing his glasses back up while he thinks of what else to add. He finishes with very deliberately adding that a fancy lineage isn't necessarily a good indicator for milk quality, elise.]

 

I think there are some plants in the swamps that might do that. They're probably poisonous, and I was busy trying not to get eaten by spiders. -this... might actually be viable? Ren is not thinking about the whole dreamspace thing, whoops-

 

[He allows this with the grace and resignation of someone long used to this behavior.]

See? He's a lovebug.