shitposting rave 5: discount rejects from every genre

-Most Innocent Expression. Did she draw blood? If she drew blood it's definitely on her face- I haven't a clue what you're talking about.

 

Sunshine has horns but he's never done that to me.

I dunno what hard guro is - Gandhi with an erection, maybe? - but... the way you're talking about it, well... I guess I don't want it.

So I'm not the only one confused by the slang the young folks are using. Good.

 

Look I didn't feel like the tail today.

-stop making it so hard to straightface at Dave. Good thing she's a goddamn pro-

 

[He's covering the dog's ears now too. Why are people like this?]

 

Tail. Eh. No big deal. I've got a tail.

 

-her spine makes a sound like cartilage tearing and bones grinding and a tail drops out of her skirt and into view. At the end the tail splits into three. One has a spearhead shape instead of the more traditional heart or spade, another is suspiciously cephalopodian, and the third is sleek like a cat's but covered in albino translucent-white feathers. They absentmindedly twine around each other, and the whole thing around her leg. It's not exactly standard, but does help the whole demonic #aesthetic, especially keeping the goetia in mind-

 

... okay. Wow. I guess it is a big deal then.

 

Have you figured it out yet or do I need to spell it out?

 

Please do enlighten the class; I for one have never seen kibble like that before, though to be fair I don't exactly have the Taxonomy memorized.

 

[oh boy]

[oh boy. dave presses his lips together into a thin line. Increase Pokerface]

youve got a little uh
gunk
on your face
careful your fetish is showing

dude context clues
im not gonna be your guiding light into the world of kink this is a duty im gonna have to pass off

 

Yeah. Okay. You're a demon. But you're not Bill. And I did not expect to get bitten.

Uh... biting? Blood?

 

youre getting warmer
but seriously can you puzzle this one out without me teaching you the ways other folks get down and dirty
normally id be all about explaining slash mocking a kink that aint my own but this ones kind of a special case
if getting frisky is the main game then this is a dlc im not buying you catch my drift

 

-LICK. Her tongue is healthy-tissue-should-not-bet-that-shade-of-purple and twice as long as it should be-

-jazz hands: glowing letters spelling "DEMON BITCH" appear around her, like Lichtenberg scars on reality. Kind of hurt to look at for too long, but they sizzle out pretty quick-

Just because I don't dick other dimensions for funsies doesn't mean I'm above random acts of cruelty. I think I may be contractually obligated to mess with anyone who ignores that many warning signs.

 

jeebus dude
that is at least three different kinds of nasty and all of them belong in a hentai

 

...demon. Well. I shouldn't be surprised, if both the Well and... whatever this place is exist. The temples just got the descriptions as wrong as everything else, I suppose. Thank you.

 

Ford groans. "Norm, there is a reason demons are edge cases in personhood debates, and that is because they may be people, but it is not safe to assume that they aren't malicious. There is a reason sorcerers who knowingly and willingly work with demons do not summon them unless they can bind them. 'Demon', like 'god', is a word that covers a wide variety of beings, some of whom want to be people and can, like my student Tom, but many of whom are purely malicious and have little to no choice about being that way, even if they wanted a choice, which they don't, and trusting them in good faith gets you and everything you love and care about fucked. Remember, I treated Bill like a friend, a lover even, and you saw where that got me."

 

Well, I think demons are still people, but it turns out that you can murder people quite often without repercussions if they hurt you first. Not that I'm advocating for that in this instance, of course, but... Are you a lust demon or a pride demon? I'm inclined to say pride, but you're a bit smaller than the ones I'm used to.

[He looks at @Poisoned Silk with the unnervingly interested expression of someone who's moved on from Fade studies to study of spirits in particular. Turns out, Tevinter has a lot of those.]

 

[Dryly:] Can't fuck what's already dead and gone, even if I were inclined to trust a self-proclaimed servant of the Unmaker.

Demons have categories wherever you studied?

 

Perhaps not your demons though. This place is outside of capital-C-Creation for me. Though I wouldn't put it past the featherdusters to repeat the experiment with actual machines.

Yes.

 

Wanna watch me lick my eyeball?