shitposting rave 5: discount rejects from every genre

[Macaria eventuall begins dancing on Mala instead because she is nothing if not a terrible show off and taunting tease, seemingly entirely unbothered by the fangs and claws.]

 

... if you say so...

 

Best of my ability, cross my spark!

 

I suppose it might sound that way to you, but I imagine the actual metaphysical qualities are quite different. For those who indulged enough in demon-summoning and blood magic to write it down properly, it was assumed that every spirit had a purpose and a realm of ability that they were most apt at, but that didn't mean you couldn't summon one for something rather different.

Bit of a guessing game, though. Rage demons are surprisingly poor at combat, despite being summoned for it most often, but despair is one of the most efficient killers I've ever seen.

 

... thanks.

 

[Despite ongoing Tag, a hand emerges to make 'blah blah blah' gestures.]

[They could just open a mouth right beneath her, but that would be cheating. Much wriggle and wingflappy instead.]

 

A shame I'm not actually alive to take the message back to the rest of the world, then.

 

No problem. (ﾉ^∇^)ﾉﾟ

-Primus rolls his optics and ignores him-

-He smiles- You will be soon, I think. And you might not be you as you are now, and you won't remember this, but some of the truth will stick. Truth is a sticky, sticky thing at its core. Some nugget of it always survives.

 

[he gives them the apple and waves]
hi yourself hows it shakin
i think you just missed the demon party

no its a historical drama and is the hallmark of human achievement

yes
hell yes
hell fucking yes

[dave snops and some truly ill beats start playing]

 

[They wave a paw dismissively]
Again. I could be a Watcher if needed. It would just be a lot more costly than getting someone good at that kind of work instead. The masters know the consort is making me do work far beneath me, but he has the courtesy of paying well.

 

[She twirls, snickering.]

 

Really? But if The Birch Wolf was there it was probably booooooring.

 

Spock was real? Why hasn't my kind met Volkswagens then?

 

Do you always set rates based upon your level of skill, or is it a matter of being able to exact punishment against those who give you a contract that's demeaning?

A great deal of contract law, from what I caught of it. Some people find that thrilling.

 

No, no, the cool demons were having a real demon party with frilly drinks.

 

*head pixie and sanderson come in, dabbing, and then float out*

 

[...would it be weird to hug robot god? Probably. Let's. Not do that. Where did that impulse even come from? Switchboard nods instead, careful and polite.]

 

-Primus, not tied down by such petty things as propriety, slings an arm around Switchboard and pulls him close, into a more proper hug. It's like the Ultimate Dad Hug, fatherly and protective and so fuckin' proud of you.-

 

Eh. Depends on many factors. How dangerous. How generous one is feeling. How slim the pickings are. Moon Phase. If it sounds fun. If one likes the master's smell. What the courting gift was. If one feels like twisting oneself to appeal.

 

Is there still a driiiiink? Can I have oooone?