shitposting rave 5: discount rejects from every genre

Valiska laughs softly. "No," she says, taking Ford's hand and lacing her five fingers through his six. "We're not. It makes for an interesting household, since both of my mates are scientists, and I am also a scientist. But it's not out of disrespect for the people we question, it's out of respect for the truth."

 

I'm pretty sure science is why people who aren't magical genies or fairies or demons or whatever don't get polio anymore. And why they've went to the moon. And why people don't have to wash most of their dishes by hand anymore.

 

"Fine from your point of view," Ford says, "but I've noticed, throughout my travels, that people generally like having longer, easier lives--and seeing their children all survive to grow up."

 

[They grin at her, despite the human shape still looking decidedly wolfish]
Forgive me madam, but were you to never invite me to or near your home I would likely consider it payment, were it not for the exclusivity agreement currently binding my paws- er hands.

 

*laughs* I'm getting the impression that she'd be keen on you leaving, actually, so you've got nothing to worry about there!

 

"Be assured we have no intention of ever inviting you." Valiska smiles broadly, mischief dancing in her eyes.

 

-Billy's back, flopping down next to Grimm-
Hey old man. Share.

 

[Lazy drawl, impossible to tell if they are sincere or not:] How dare you a sibling of mine is starving because mortals invented the steam engine.

[shrug] I am not Eye of Snakes, I have little fondness for strangers just for their theoretic struggles. I am displeased with probing questions and mannerless know-it-alls, thus I am displeased with science. The demon consort at least concerns himself with keeping to ettiquette.

 

Sincerest thanks. I would offer you a sip to honor the agreement but you are with child.

[They snort and hold the bowl out.]
Jealous because no one has managed to extract a spirit from rubies yet, lad?

 

Jealous because I can eat whatever I like and gain nourishment rather than relying on appropriate offerings? -he takes the bowl, surprisingly politely, and drinks-

 

"And yet, you keep answering me, when nothing is compelling you to do it." Ford can't help being amused. "You want me to say that I was wrong, but until I have enough information to be sure that I am wrong, all you are going to get is that of course, there's a chance I am wrong--but I am working from a theory that fits the evidence I've got, and if you want me to abandon or alter it, you will have to provide me with evidence that it really is wrong." He shrugs. "If you're willing to let it drop on the grounds that I've said that of course it's possible I could be wrong, then we can drop it, though now I really do want to know, and I will probably pester Helios or someone else about it all. Because there's nothing compelling you to indulge me, and I'm not about to enter into a contract with you, not even if my lady wife were willing to permit it. But if you want me to say that I am wrong, I will have to know that I'm wrong. Which would be exciting. That would mean that the theory is incomplete at the very least."

 

Why would I bother with anything that is not birch? It is objectively the best. In truth you are the poorer one of us for not knowing this simple truth.

Boredom is compelling. How am I to provide satisfactory evidence besides "this is how it is, stop questioning my meals"?
Also do not bother the lad, he is not from my world, he is merely surprisingly polite. For example he has offered me payment for pestering me and has asked out of honest interest rather than out of an attitude of superiority.
If you must pester someone, pester the ribbon.

 

That attitude is merely because you can't get by on gemstones. -he drinks again, then passes the bowl back, wiping his mouth on his arm and sprawling out like the carefree youth of somewhat indeterminate age he is-

 

Valiska laughs out loud. "Helios made the mistake of asking Ford questions," she says. "And I did say we're not inviting you over. My husband does not have an attitude of superiority, though he did initially react rather badly to yours. I assure you, he's honestly interested. In just about everything."

 

[Grimm barks a laugh, taking the bowl back sipping again.]
Does the consort know you are letting your manners slip, lad?

 

He should work on communicating it better.
And so you did. Maybe that is why I am enduring the questions. Maybe it is merely because I am off the job. Maybe I am simply tired of simpering whiny nonsense and am trading one annoyance for another.

 

-Billy quirks a grin at him- Jus' enjoying not havin' to be bound by so many rules any more.

 

[Wolf grandpa rolls their eyes]
If the ribbon did not entirely lose every single inch of sanity that remained in their grasp I would muse about giving it a try but one of our cohort simply must keep their wits together, gemhide.

 

"You wouldn't be the first person to tell me my communication skills are subpar," says Ford, with a grin. "And I do work on them, but I'm not gifted in that area, I fear. I am interested. As entertaining as it would be to find out that my theory is correct and we're just arguing semantics, it would be much more exciting to learn that there's evidence which doesn't fit into my theory, and try and figure out what I've got wrong. You have no idea how much fun it would actually be if I could just do my research instead of having to defend my home dimensions all the time!"

 

Valiska reaches up to pet Ford's floof. He's so adorable when he's like this.