shitposting rave 5: discount rejects from every genre

can i introduce you to my middle finger

 

Hello Mr. Middle Finger. Nice to meet you.

 

"What creepy second-rate comic book did you crawl out of and how do we send you back?"

 

Mii! -how dare touch paws! the mi tries to catch the finger-

Mixed with clouds!

No, mixed with clouds.

 

-a Vent appears, with a ventcat in-
What the frag is this, a party or a brawl? If it´s the second wait till I get some rustflakes ok?

 

I 5ay, you could really u5e 5ome work on your 5ales pitch.

 

I mean I have been to a few parties that turned into brawls later. Or brawls that turned into parties. Decepticon quarters were wild, on occassion. Rust stick? [He holds so up into vent-reach.]

 

-the ruststick get snatched- From hearin you scraphelms talk you did nothing but party, with some light fighting when even the fragging got boring.

 

I mean a lot of fighting also happened but mostly on the battlefield. Though that gets talked about less because people tend to die in those and that makes it painful to talk about. Easier to focus on kinds of fighting that didn't result in casualties.

 

Ah, I getcha. I never did give hlf a scrap about the "glory and dignity of Vos", but you do you!

"Evil"... "better". Yeah, okay, I believe you, I don't think there's ever been an Autobot who would've said that. I don't know about dashing, though, that's gonna be a personal opinion thing.

Party with some blood?

Yeah see this guy gets it.

 

Hello Ignis! [He's mindful of the humans still hiding behind him, but his wings are mostly out of reach, so a tiny little flare-and-angle wouldn't hurt them, or even thouch them, being far above their heads]

 

Heeeey! [Ignis has no such restrictions on his movement; his wings perk up and flick a greeting.] Updraft, right? How you been?

 

Yes, and quite well, thank you! I have started to write my research up into publishable forms. It's so nice to see you [Asking Ignis how he's been is... probably a bit rude, considering that the answer's likely to be 'still dead']

 

Fair, I guess. So do something interesting!

I think I like you! Glory and Dignity of Placeholder can lick my shiny aft.

 

I mean I could tell you about my research but it is a bit niche and I doubt you would find that interesting?
Or about the ship, it's a holovid drama played out live. You wouldn't believe it.

 

The kind where people die or the kind that´s all about who´s fragging who up which jack?

 

Both, with a generous helping of 'why is everyone stupid about talking to each other'.

 

You could lock then in a room together until they do?

 

Sweet! Seriously, man, good for you, that's gonna be awesome.

[Snickering] I know, right?

I mean usually the answer to that is "trauma and/or too many feelings," but what do I know about how things are going in peacetime?

 

I suspect that people would die if we did that. Potentially, parts of the ship would explode.

Yeah I am aware, but that does not make it any less frustrating to watch from the outside. Especially because I am no longer allowed to just pick people up and physically haul them around if they are being stupid.