shitposting rave 5: discount rejects from every genre

[His grim frown softens just a fraction]
Allow yourself to try again. Not all is lost. Your destiny is not inextricably tied to suffering.

 

If your dead, how are you here?

 

-barely audible- Tell that to Updraft.

 

[Updraft perks up from the cuddle pile and looks around. He'd swear he'd heard his name.... but no, nothing there, so he settles back down]

 

...we were? Uh. I mean. We were! What would you like to know? What styles do you dance?

Shenanigans? I don't question much anymore, mech.

[Pet pet pet the new friend. Not on the wings, that would be rude, just... Smoothing down his arms and back.]

 

[He settles back somewhere below Ignis' wings, where he isn't touching them but still shielded by them. Talking about dancing sounds good, he's only ever watched, too large and unwieldy to go any of it himself but he's quite enjoyed watching in his time] I had no idea that there were so many different styles to begin with. [Please tell him about the nice and distracting thing, yes]

 

[Unicron glances over at Updraft, snorting, then resumes looking down at Shade.]
I do not have to. His opinion on this matters little on a cosmic scale. Besides he is fundamentally opposed to me in almost every conceivable way, there is little we would see eye to eye on even if he was tall enough to meet my optics unassisted.

 

-this does not seem to be especially comforting. Shade folds further down into himself and declines to answer-

 

[Unicron.... stares for a bit then turns away. HeTried.jpg]

 

"You were saying silk dancing could probably be done by someone my size, which makes sense, because I think I saw something similar at Cirque du Soleil once," says Lissa. "I love dancing. I can waltz around a ballroom, I can belly-dance...and I can pole-dance too." She grins. "I can't do ballet. My feet aren't right for it. Claws on my feet don't retract, so I can't dance on my toes. Jezebel was so disappointed when she couldn't do ballet either."

 

What's up?

 

....riiight, you would need to stay on your feet, wouldn't you? [He laughs a little, more at himself than anything.] A good bit of Vosian dance gets done flipping between alt and root, so feet aren't even an option half the time!

 

"Not on the silks, or on a pole," says Lissa. "But for ballet, yes. On a pole, I can spin around the pole holding on with any or all of my four limbs, and I'm assuming I'd use my arms and legs with the silks to hold on just the same. I've danced on scaffolding, too."

 

Yep! Well, and wings for us, but I don't think that's an option for you. [Ignis shrugs.] And, well, winddancing is obviously out of the question too, and that's the closest Vos ever came to grounder ballet, stylistically speaking.

 

"If someone made wings and attached them to my shoulders I could fly," says Lissa, "but first I'd have to learn to use them for transportation before I tried to dance!"

 

"That would be adorable." Ford grins. "I bet someone in the family could do that."

 

Ehhh, I don't think it's so much your shoulders as your entire back-- [rather than get up and demonstrate himself, Ignis summons a scaled-down model of a Perfectly Generic Seeker and gestures vaguely at the way the wings do indeed run all the way down its torso--] but point taken. I... have no idea where you'd find a teacher for winddancing, though. Maybe you could ask that Burlesque guy about silks if he comes back, but...

 

"Most things that fly also have tails," Ford points out, "but that would also be cute." He kisses the top of Lissa's head. She is the most precious and there isn't anything he wouldn't do for her. Or for their daughter. Or any other child of hers, if she ever manages to have one. "You'd be our world's first flying cat!"

 

-she'd woken up for a while. Now she's back looking like she might puke, and Absolutely Not Crying though it looks like that might change soon-

 

Eugh, PDA.

-Lacuna completely ignores the fact that she is suuuuper handsy with Burlesque whenever he pops in.-