shitposting rave 5: discount rejects from every genre

Oh, no no no-- if one gets any idea in their silly little head, they might make others wonder! And we can't have that, now can we? Best to just take out those silly little thoughts before they can spread too far.

 

With literal mind control, no less! But if that seems like too much effort, well, there's always some sort of blood magic ritual in need of a sacrifice. You can even make one up on the fly if you're bored enough.

 

You are doing that on purpose? Why?

-Libby smiles. It is not a very nice smile- My thoughts exactly Captain.

 

"Well, it might be different for mechs, but among organics that sort of thing always goes south very fast. Generally, oppressive organic societies have some sort of age and gender stratification going on, which means that innocent people who were not given a choice about who their parents were or to whom they were married get raped, murdered and eaten as well." Ford shrugs.

 

Not to mention that systemic oppression is. Well. Systemic. You're not going to solve societal issues by killing whoever is enforcing them the most visibly. Though people keep just assuming it works that way.
I think it was someone in the UNNC that dubbed this "Who do we have to shoot" syndrome.

 

Then thed better join us, hadn´t they?

 

[dave spreads his hands in a "why not"
gesture. honey drips onto his shoe.]

for reals dude this kind of reaction is EXACTLY why i toil in the oversaturated sweatshop hand crafting some designer garbage
like
shit hes got to have SOME reason to do this right?
he put in too much effort for it to just be a shitfest free for all didnt he?
and then they scour the earth trying to figure out what the great dave strider intended
but there is no greater meaning
and thats the greatest meaning of them all
now if youll excuse me i have to go blow my pretentious fuckin load all over my internet money
nah but for real its just fun to make shit that bad
how bad is it possible for something to be
im gonna find out

 

So, a sort of performance art? -sips something that sure looks like tea-

 

Exactly. Or you can just have them vanish! Quite useful, vanishing.

And yet people still wonder why we had problems with the Autobots' plan to install a new, theoretically "better" Prime and Senate.

 

i mean if you wanna put it like that sure
sbahj doesnt really have to like HAVE a greater purpose though
the whole point is its shit and its deliberately shit and it will always be a big ole glittery turd and people eat it up anyway
like im sure someone could put a spin on this to make it sound like some
choice ass wisdom nugs but really im just doing whatever and letting shit happen
i need to stop saying shit

 

We have nigh infinite life spans. Our ruling class does not die off unless they get help with that. I never spoke of rape, I am not some sort of tasteless towerling. I speak merely of eating. If the rich will not equalize fuel allocations among all of cybertronians then I will make them my fuel and see how they like it.

beautiful rhetoric you have there, it would be a shame if I was to have a violent revolution all over it because I am a wee bit bitter about the mechs who literally owned me and my brethren getting away with it unscathed for so long. No.

What Libre said.

Right? You'd think they could put two and two together.

 

Oh, please. You and I might not be willing to cross that line, but it's near-impossible that every Decepticon is so considerate.

 

Yes, you went and killed the planet. Very good job, all of you, we're terribly impressed.

 

Well if you want people to question things, I will say you have achieved your purpose. Even if they merely question their own sanity.

I thought that was what the justice division was for?

 

Ah, yes, the madness of a few is absolutely the fault of many. How dare so few of us be capable of redirecting Thunderwing, or forseeing Galvatron's return? A true failing.

 

[Glow barks a single short, sharp note that might have been a laugh at some point in the distant past.] The Justice Division ensures loyalty to the Cause, not morality. And it's bad even at the former.

 

Oh, you really did not need either of them for that. Megatron was very capable of doing so all on his own, especially with his conjunx Optimus Prime over there goading him and stomping all over the ones lucky enough to escape the glorious revolution freeing them of their suffering through the most brutal way possible.

Really, you ought to have told them to take the day off. Might have had a planet for slightly longer!

 

what i want is that sweet sweet ad revenue and if i cause some existential breakdowns in the process then thats just a bonus
nah im kidding i dont need the ad revenue i mostly foist my sbahjdollars off on other people
my purpose got achieved a while ago im enjoying the fruits of retirement

 

-She pats his leg.-

 

-unimpressed face is unimpressed-

I´m glad someone here is happy.