shitposting rave 5: discount rejects from every genre

Okay. Well. That clarifies things.

... and I'm guessing that you're taking my words and recycling them, so... maybe I shouldn't have given you that one. Then again, well... I don't think anyone in here is gonna judge me about this. After all, I've definitely seen weirder in here. Robot porn, catgirl threeways, fanfic tropes that are actually pretty accurate...

*sighs* Alas. My ass-reaching capabilities have been compromised. For a while now.

 

Course he is. -she sounds amused, and gives ups a passing noof-

Pooor lil newspark. -she pads over and pounces up, expecting to be caught-

Hey, haven´t seen you before.

 

*Squinty face*

catgirl threeways.

*tempted to transform so he can talk...*

*alright FINE root mode it is*

Good, means I'm doing a good job. Seen you though.

 

Well. Okay, no. I didn't actually watch or participate in the catgirl threeways. But the fact that they exist in here - that was made pretty clear to me.

 

I don't think we have met yet? I am Updraft. [More people was clearly better. Always]

Yes how could I forget that. [Is he teasing him? Maybe a little.] People have clearly not written enough poetry about you yet.

 

Hey I resemble that remark :P

[He does indeed catch the catte]

Enough poetry? You mean someone's written poetry about me and I never got to see it? D8 [Venture splays his wings in mock-horror.]

 

Weird.

No, we haven't. *Squinty eyes*

 

'Cause you're a robot or 'cause you wanna fuck everybody? Or both?

... yeah. Kinda.

 

Both and also I'm pretty sure you've seen porn involving me here :P

 

... yeah. I might've.

Sorry?

 

Venture. Sweetspark. [He tries to look halfway serious but the success is debatable] I am sure that you have been leaving people in enough of a state to write poetry of questionable quality and not-work-safe content for a long while. Try looking up your name on the databanks at some point?

[He tilts his wings questioningly and waits for anything more to come]

 

Correction: I like Venture just fine. Unfortunately, have not met him outside of professional settings, where the ethical issues of pursuit are made abundantly clear.

 

... Quietstep... Of Carcer.

*What is trust? He don't know her*

 

It was a joke my guy
shhhh
unless you're apologizing for the porn case in which case don't??? We sell that slag on purpose?? If I had problems with being filmed I wouldn't be volunteering for it y'know?

that's cheating :< Gossip for the pool has to spread naturally and I've got a nice pile of shanix on someone besides Gears writing about me

 

....uh? Ethics of what now? Why would ethics get in the way of anything like that?? I mean unless it's for another "shit something's stuck" 'cause usually that just hurts worse if you stuff more up after it-- [someone shut ramblebird up please]

 

Doctor-patient relationship asks that flirting be off the table. Especially when we are removing things that you have managed to get stuck. [His voice is dryer than the sands of Velocitron.]

 

Nice to meet you, Quietstep. [No idea where Carcer is, but eh]

Of course you do. I suppose that would make it cheating if I went out and found it, too?

[He reaches over and very gently puts his hand over Venture's mouth, smiling at him] Slow down? and yes I think everyone in medical knows about that by now. [Yes he's fond, Venture is very nice, but then again he likes the whole trine more than he should, really]

 

... oh. I thought... I dunno... that you'd be mad or whatever. Most people would be pretty pissed if I happened across porn of them or whatever. If anyone happened upon porn of them, really. Not just if me, specifically, Church, happened across it. If anyone did. Yeah.

Happened upon it and... fuck... I didn't, did I? Godfuckingdammit I did!

Okay... you're going to have to decapitate me. Metaphorically. And in the least sexy way possible.

 

... Nice to meet you too, Updraft. I guess... Fragging big, aren't you?

 

Look my time is not infinite, I hve other slag to do throughout the cycle than keep up with weird tiny people and their weird tiny people problems.

[He pets Venture. More like he slaps his shoulder kinda ungently. Scanner no.]