shitposting rave 5: discount rejects from every genre

[Vector laughs.] I know, so tragic. Most of them don't even know what a Klingon is and they're still disappointed in me!

 

[He points at him with a pizza slice]
This is why you're my least favorite brother.

 

Well, yes, but "sitting in an etheric pit waiting for your next body to exist in the physical world" isn't quite the same as what most humans mean by "dead," now is it? And for that matter the Well's quite nice, there are plenty of things worse than that kind of death.

 

-This seem a satisfactory introduction! And there is probably enough pizza for two wolves. Wolf play bows-

-Sphere beeps hello back! She introduces herself a New Genesphere, still in beeps incomprehensible to non robots-

I thought Klingons weren´t real.

 

Yeah, I'd give it a 3 out of 10 on the weird scale. Notable, but not really relevant past the first surprise. Wait until you meet one of the dead guys in here.

That's family for you. Or, I assume that's family for you, because to be completely honest, I could give fewer shits about family and find the whole... thing pretty stupid. Having kids is like painting a big red target that says 'hurt me now!' and you know what? Not really my deal.

[He waves a hand vaguely, then drinks. Who needs pizza when you have frankly lethal amounts of alcohol.]

 

*shifts to wolf shape again and play bows back before running circles. CHASE*

 

I don't think I've heard of those before! It's a pleasure, at any rate; I am Vector Prime, one of my universe's protectors.

Everything's real somewhere!

 

Somebody's gotta be the family disappointment.

-shrugs-
Depends on your religion. We got a lot of those.

-he laughs-
I'm a former dead guy. Be nice to meet some of my own kind.

 

Spoiler: translation

KLINGON ISN'T EVEN THAT OUT THERE, AS FAR AS ALIEN LANGUAGES GO. I MEAN, HUMAN VOCAL CORDS CAN REPRODUCE IT WITHOUT *TOO* MUCH TROUBLE. I WANNA SEE SOMEONE DO THIS AS A NERD CONVENTION.

 

u mention ded guys?

*He's floating upside down while sitting cross legged. Defalt has learned to take advantage of this space.*

 

No shit, huh? How'd you go and become not dead? Asking for a friend.

It doesn't count if an actual alien is speaking it. That's pretty much just straight up cheating.

Theeeere you are. Hey, look, there's a former-dead guy here, go make friends or whatever. You can do that, right? Make 'friends'?

 

-Definitely Chase! for such a grim looking animal, wolf can be remarkable goofy-

-Pleased greeting beep. Sphere is currently taking care of earth and also Connor and his friends, who are very brave but not very bright sometimes-

What do you mean former dead guy? Once you die you´re dead.

 

no im allergic. If i make friends i end up pissin' em off or something, idk.

 

*Gets so hype over chase that he sparks a little across his fur before skidding to a halt and play bowing again. PLAY.*

 

ive always wanted another hot mom

oh dude
i got legs for DAYS

if youre bad at it sure

 

Yeah but you don't gotta hog the position. You usurped my throne for that y'know.

[Oh it's really hard to keep a straight face about that. Oh boy.]
Nnnnnot really. At least not always. Death is complicated.

 

Yyyeah you cna tell her that, Not it.

 

r u fuckers tellin me that I can come back from being killed by neurotoxins? Cause. Dish. I got albums to make, fukkers to kill, systems to hack

 

Ehhh, depends on how you died, don't it? I mean, faking a death ain't that hard, and there's all sorts of people who get their hearts restarted after being dead as shit for twenty minutes or something. I've seen it on TV before.

[He sips at his drink, then grins.] They don't often stand back up after I'm done with them though. My success rate's pretty high.

It's fucking exposure therapy or something, go trigger your allergies for science.

 

but DAAAAAAAAAD